Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Blastbeard]

Source: ate at chipotle once. Once.

Given all the shit that's gone wrong with their food, I don't get how their still open.

US food regulations theoretically allow you to sell minemeat that's 50% sawdust as mincemeat. So, well...

Not to mention that bit where an "acceptable amount of insect parts" in certain foods happens to be a value above 0%. At least we get some extra protein out of it.

Dwarves are lactose intolerant.  Consuming milk or cheese will cause them to generate miasma explode.  Consuming any imported food has a 25% chance of doing the same.  Additionally, dwarven digestion gets more sensitive with age, adding one additional random food every year after reaching adulthood.

Apart from the exploding bit, not that terrible. Humans are able to drink as much milk as they can thanks to some good fortune with genetics. In DF you could translate it to a worldgen parameter where a civ has a chance to spawn lactose tolerant citizens or not. If they can't hold their milk, they can't produce dairy products.

Dwarves and humans should have allergies. There's no way of knowing what they are allergic to or how severe the allergy is until they trigger it.

Urist McEveryone'sfriend, grand master armorsmith, has died of a peanut allergy.

[Naturegirl1999]

Source: ate at chipotle once. Once.

Given all the shit that's gone wrong with their food, I don't get how their still open.

US food regulations theoretically allow you to sell minemeat that's 50% sawdust as mincemeat. So, well...

Wait what?

[MachoNacho]

Dwarves poop now, but their poop is just magma.

[Abyssmo]

Every time your dwarf has to craft something, there is a chance of them completely messing it up and harming themselves in the process. Depending on how skilled they are at something, this chance will obviously be decreased for that specific action.
Dwarf trying to craft wood furniture? They accidentally sawed their fingers off.
Dwarf trying to craft armor? They accidentally burned themselves from the sparks of smashing red hot stuff on an anvil.
Dwarf trying to heal another sick or injured Dwarf? They mixed up their medicine with magma and injected it into the injured Dwarf.
Dwarf trying to train a goose? They were mauled to death.
Dwarf trying to cook a simple biscuit? They screwed up the recipe and now everyone has parasites from eating raw Elk Bird.
Dwarf trying to make soap? Well...

[BigUglyWorm]

Every time your dwarf has to craft something, there is a chance of them completely messing it up and harming themselves in the process. Depending on how skilled they are at something, this chance will obviously be decreased for that specific action.
Dwarf trying to craft wood furniture? They accidentally sawed their fingers off.
Dwarf trying to craft armor? They accidentally burned themselves from the sparks of smashing red hot stuff on an anvil.
Dwarf trying to heal another sick or injured Dwarf? They mixed up their medicine with magma and injected it into the injured Dwarf.
Dwarf trying to train a goose? They were mauled to death.
Dwarf trying to cook a simple biscuit? They screwed up the recipe and now everyone has parasites from eating raw Elk Bird.
Dwarf trying to make soap? Well...

Additionally, there's a chance for a given workshop to be "cursed", especially if a dwarf dies near there; these workshops will cause significantly more, and worse, injuries than normal.  Animals will have a similar state, defined in-game as having acquired "a taste for dwarven blood".

[!!Urist McMagmadiver!!]

Apple Partnership: DF is now only available on IOS mobile devices. The control scheme and graphics are completely unchanged.

[MachoNacho]

Miasma is now infectious. Dwarves exposed to miasma for too long begin generating more miasma.

[nezclaw]

add Diseases, Vaccines, and Antivaxxers.

Now I know what you're thinking. Diseases that could be transmitted from dwarf to dwarf? Possibly mutating and causing new and !!FUN!! syndromes? Why that's almost a good idea!

But the power to vaccinate? And then some dwarves deciding not to? Allowing the diseases to mutate within them into a form the vaccines don't defend against? Well! That's truly a !!FUN!! concept!
Particularly as the clowns can catch these diseases and mutate them into even more dangerous forms.

Apple Partnership: DF is now only available on IOS mobile devices. The control scheme and graphics are completely unchanged.

Framerate tanks once your fort reaches a certain age, regardless of the worldgen parameters. A tiny fort in a pocket sized world with only about 35 dorfs? After two in game years, it runs like a large world with a large fort with ten million items and 200 dwarves, an oldstyle magma pumpstack, and all while being besieged by a couple hundred invaders.

Also you need a proprietary bluetooth keyboard. The battery lasts ten minutes and the charging cord is too short to do anything with.

[Urist McUristUrist]

Apple Partnership: DF is now only available on IOS mobile devices. The control scheme and graphics are completely unchanged.

Framerate tanks once your fort reaches a certain age, regardless of the worldgen parameters. A tiny fort in a pocket sized world with only about 35 dorfs? After two in game years, it runs like a large world with a large fort with ten million items and 200 dwarves, an oldstyle magma pumpstack, and all while being besieged by a couple hundred invaders.

Also you need a proprietary bluetooth keyboard. The battery lasts ten minutes and the charging cord is too short to do anything with.

You can buy an Apple DF-playing stand for a better experience (costs 9999$)

[Azerty]

Apple Partnership: DF is now only available on IOS mobile devices. The control scheme and graphics are completely unchanged.

Framerate tanks once your fort reaches a certain age, regardless of the worldgen parameters. A tiny fort in a pocket sized world with only about 35 dorfs? After two in game years, it runs like a large world with a large fort with ten million items and 200 dwarves, an oldstyle magma pumpstack, and all while being besieged by a couple hundred invaders.

Also you need a proprietary bluetooth keyboard. The battery lasts ten minutes and the charging cord is too short to do anything with.

You can buy an Apple DF-playing stand for a better experience (costs 9999$)

And every two years, there's an update of the mobile device, and you will have to rebuy the application again.

[MachoNacho]

Dwarves can now deep fry themselves.

[nezclaw]

Dwarves can now deep fry themselves.

isn't that just magmadiving?

[MachoNacho]

Dwarves can now deep fry themselves.

isn't that just magmadiving?

No, that burns them too far to even consider it deep frying.

[nezclaw]

Apple Partnership: DF is now only available on IOS mobile devices. The control scheme and graphics are completely unchanged.

Framerate tanks once your fort reaches a certain age, regardless of the worldgen parameters. A tiny fort in a pocket sized world with only about 35 dorfs? After two in game years, it runs like a large world with a large fort with ten million items and 200 dwarves, an oldstyle magma pumpstack, and all while being besieged by a couple hundred invaders.

Also you need a proprietary bluetooth keyboard. The battery lasts ten minutes and the charging cord is too short to do anything with.

You can buy an Apple DF-playing stand for a better experience (costs 9999$)

And every two years, there's an update of the mobile device, and you will have to rebuy the application again.

and you can't transfer your saves

[Urist McUristUrist]

All the Apple partnerahip stuff above but with the simplification thing from a few pages ago.