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Author Topic: Terrible Suggestions Thread  (Read 541008 times)

Naturegirl1999

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #660 on: June 26, 2019, 05:19:41 pm »

Introduce marijuana, derived from existing hemp plants.  Dwarves who use it experience a drop in stress and are far less likely to start fights, but will also devour mass amounts of food and booze until they come down off their high.  There's also a small chance they'll have a bad trip, resulting in a huge burst of stress.
This sounds like a good idea
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UristMcVampire

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #661 on: June 26, 2019, 10:00:23 pm »

The exact opposite of food.
Anti food: when ingested, makes them more hungry. Anti feces slow down plantgrowth when used as fertilizer
Anti diarrhea: It somehow gives dwarves explosive diarrhea. Literally. They just explode into a cloud of magma mist and miasma.
Anti miasma caused by the explosions smells like the best thing ever, since it’s the opposite of miasma. This causes dwarves and other creatures to be starved or dehydrated to death by standing in and smelling the stuff while forgetting about their survival needs
Anti magma mist: It's dangerously cold and will turn dwarves into *ice statue of a dwarf*.
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GENERATION 10: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig on any forum and add 1 to the generation. Social experiment.


 Naga/Lamia race

xZippy

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #662 on: June 27, 2019, 12:06:54 am »

Dwarves should quote YTP's.
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Criperum

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #663 on: June 27, 2019, 04:13:46 am »

I hope all those anti things will be in magic release
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Naturegirl1999

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #664 on: June 27, 2019, 07:19:32 am »

Dwarves should quote YTP's.
What’s ytps?
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LordBaal

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #665 on: June 27, 2019, 07:30:55 am »

Dwarves should quote YTP's.
What’s ytps?
All of them, at the same time.
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I'm curious as to how a tank would evolve. Would it climb out of the primordial ooze wiggling it's track-nubs, feeding on smaller jeeps before crawling onto the shore having evolved proper treds?
My ship exploded midflight, but all the shrapnel totally landed on Alpha Centauri before anyone else did.  Bow before me world leaders!

BigUglyWorm

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #666 on: June 27, 2019, 07:45:56 am »

Dwarves should quote YTP's.
"Mah boi, this peace is what All true warriors strive FOR!"
"I just wonder what the Goblins are up to!"

"Sure was nice of da dwarves to invite us over for a siege, eh, Udoz?"
"I Hope they made Lotsa BABIES!"
« Last Edit: June 27, 2019, 08:02:36 am by BigUglyWorm »
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xZippy

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #667 on: June 27, 2019, 05:53:45 pm »

Dwarves just stop doing whatever they're doing at random times to just think about Bruce Willis. Dwarves might actually starve to death doing this.
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PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #668 on: June 27, 2019, 05:58:30 pm »

There should be some magical equivalent of the internet (maybe a crystal-ball-esque device of some kind), which once your dwarves get a hold of it will gradually keep them from work as they spend more of their time arguing with the other civs on social media and watching cute animal videos. The most obsessive dwarves will eventually become engrossed enough to deprive themselves of sleep and food.

*Urist cancels Mine: interrupted by video of fluffy wambler sneezing*
« Last Edit: June 27, 2019, 06:15:27 pm by PlumpHelmetMan »
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

UristMcVampire

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #669 on: June 27, 2019, 06:26:17 pm »

Dwarves can eat magma but they will get explosive diarrhea.
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 Naga/Lamia race

xZippy

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #670 on: June 27, 2019, 08:48:03 pm »

Dwarves, humans and even elves quote Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff during non-full moons.

"today i put.............JELLY on this hot carp"
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Craftsdwarf boi

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #671 on: June 27, 2019, 10:48:33 pm »

*Incomprehensible vocalizations*
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DEATH THO THE THE IGNOBLE NOBLES
Come and amuse oneself the Game of Skirmishes and Transpiration!
...and Engine Heart!
"It was inevitable"----Urist Mcphilosopher
"Losing is !!FUN!!"-----Pretty much every forum member
"#Proletariatinsurrection"-----Every Non-noble dwarf when under rule by nobility

BigUglyWorm

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #672 on: June 28, 2019, 12:12:12 am »

Dwarves can eat magma but they will get explosive diarrhea.
Literally explosive.  It's a quick, efficient way to dig through large volumes of waste rock, and an excellent use of any unskilled peasants or persnickety nobles you have milling about.
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Bumber

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #673 on: June 28, 2019, 01:49:59 am »

Dwarves should quote YTP's.
"Mah boi, this peace is what All true warriors strive FOR!"
"I just wonder what the Goblins are up to!"

"Sure was nice of da dwarves to invite us over for a siege, eh, Udoz?"
"I Hope they made Lotsa BABIES!"
"That's a stone, Urist. You didn't make it."
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

SixOfSpades

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Re: Terrible Suggestions Thread
« Reply #674 on: June 28, 2019, 02:48:48 am »

Dwarves should be able to mine . . . for dwarves. Just dig them out, and they get to work.

Some professions occur as layer dwarves--Planters are sedimentary, Furnace Operators & Wood Burners are igneous (intrusive and extrusive, respectively), and Pressers are metamorphic. Gem Cutters & Gem Setters occur frequently in small clusters, and your embark may have one or more types of Blacksmith, Armorsmith, Weaponsmith, and/or Metalcrafter available, appearing in veins.

You have selected an embark with an aquifer. You may be flooded with Fisherdwarves. Continue anyway [Y/N]?

You have struck Strand Extractor! Praise the miners!
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Dwarf Fortress -- kind of like Minecraft, but for people who hate themselves.
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