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[BlueManedHawk]

Bogeymen will occasionally spawn with golf clubs and use them as a weapon.  This is the only way to obtain golf clubs.

[Starver]

...however, bogeymen will always take one more attack than expected to kill their victims. Eaglemen, meanwhile, will take two fewer attacks to incapacitate.

[A_Curious_Cat]

Toady One should implement an entire type of magic based around the use of thyme called “Thyme Magic”.

[methylatedspirit]

Toady One should implement an entire type of magic based around the use of rhyme called “Rhyme Magic”.

FTFY

[A_Curious_Cat]

Toady One should implement an entire type of magic based around the use of rhyme called “Rhyme Magic”.

FTFY

Why do people like you always have to show up and ruin the pun?

[King Zultan]

Anytime a pun is made in a fortress 1000 goblins should appear and ruin said pun.

[Mr Crabman]

Port the game to the Nintendo Switch.

[Starver]

Port the game to the Nintendo Gameboy Game & Watch.

FTFTFY

[Mobbstar]

Everytime a joke gets generated in dialogue (usually adventuremode) the age and generation of the jester should be considered to determine the nature of the punchline. Punchlines can be obscene, patriarchal, self-deprecating, or plain bizarre.

[A_Curious_Cat]

Necromancers can now raise bags that are made from leather or woven hair.  If these bags contain seeds, they can now spit them at your dwarves.

[Nordlicht]

Every seed is also undead and will start growing under the skin of dwarves into zombie plants.

[King Zultan]

Every seed is also undead and will start growing under the skin of dwarves into zombie plants.

These undead plants can take over a dwarfs body making some kind of plant/dwarf hybrid zombie.

[Bumber]

Every seed is also undead and will start growing under the skin of dwarves into zombie plants.

These undead plants can take over a dwarfs body making some kind of plant/dwarf hybrid zombie.

In undead Dwarf Fortress, plant humps elf!

[hedgerow]

How would they know if you're not just playing with yourself?

DF deploys a network of ceiling cats to watch DF players.

Yes, and hedgehogs.  And carp cultists.

[A_Curious_Cat]

Whenever you open dwarf fortress, it automatically sends an email to your boss telling them exactly when you opened it and what computer you are running it on.  A similar email is sent when you exit the program.