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OOOOOOH, BEEF HAS EXPIRED! AUUUOOH, IT GOT PARASITES!

2 (28.6%)

HOW MANY BREADS HAVE YOU EATEN IN YOUR LIFE?!

0 (0%)

I. LIKE. JUICE!

0 (0%)

HOW CAN YOU HAVE ANY PUDDING IF YOU DON'T EAT YER MEAT?!

1 (14.3%)

PINGAS!

4 (57.1%)

Total Members Voted: 7

Voting closed: August 18, 2018, 03:36:57 am

[Yoink]

RUN TOWARDS TANK WITH INTENTION OF DE-CREWING IT AT SWORDPOINT!
IF TURRET POINT TOWARDS US, ZIG-ZAG WILDLY TO THROW OFF AIM!

[Doomblade187]

USE TIKI POWERS TO DE-CREW TANK AND THEN FIRE ON SOLDIERS IN BUILDING!

[CABL]

TURN 21

>Organize all rebels to siege the HQ, using military grade explosives to breach through.

If any players want to assist me, then go for it.

RUN TOWARDS TANK WITH INTENTION OF DE-CREWING IT AT SWORDPOINT!
IF TURRET POINT TOWARDS US, ZIG-ZAG WILDLY TO THROW OFF AIM!

USE TIKI POWERS TO DE-CREW TANK AND THEN FIRE ON SOLDIERS IN BUILDING!

(5+2 VS 2) (1) THE MOB COOPERATES WITH 0CRA, TARGETING THE TANK TOGETHER! THANKS TO THE TIKI POWERS, THE TANK COMBUSTS FROM INSIDE OUT, EXPLODING INTO FLYING BITS OF METAL! YOINK WAS UNABLE TO WAKE UP; EVEN WORSE, HE EVEN STARTED TO HAVE DREAMS ABOUT JESUS SCORNING HIM FOR FAILING HIS MISSION! (4+2 VS 2) 0CRA AND THE RESISTANCE LADY USE "THORN BUSHES" TO WIDEN THE HOLE IN THE WALL, ALLOWING THE MOB TO THROW FIREBALLS AT THE INFANTRY INSIDE: MOST OF THE INFANTRY GOT BURNED INTO ASH FROM THE FIREBALL VOLLEY, AND THOSE WHO WEREN'T BURNT, WERE DECAPITATED BY DOOMBLADE FLYING AROUND AND BOUNCING OFF THE WALLS! A FIRE ALARM'S LOUD RINGING CAN BE HEARD IN THE ENTIRE DISTRICT!

" I guess pretending to be a potted plant is out of the question. Maybe if we used the desk as a sort of shield and just ran for it? Ooh! I'll pull the fire alarm, you grab the fire extinguisher!"
Ally pulls the fire alarm and dive rolls into the elevator, hoping that Igor uses the extinguisher to lay down a smokescreen and making the infantry duck by spraying it at them. f it makes the infantry into ducks, all the better! (what? Sally's in a lot of pain and is doped up, can't expect clarity here.)

(5-1) THE FIRE ALARM ALREADY GOT TRIGGERED WITHOUT SALLY'S HELP, BUT THE EXTINGUISHER WAS ACTUALLY HELPFUL AND NECESSARY: SALLY AND IGOR GET TO THE ELEVATOR, THEN RIDE IT TO THE SERVER ROOM! SINCE THE ELEVATOR USES EMERGENCY MODE, THE ELEVATOR WILL ARRIVE AFTER A TURN!

Go and ride the train to china town, and get me some Chinese booze.

(4) YOU AND THE OTHER SOLDIERS ARRIVE AT THE CHINATOWN! WHILE THE SOLDIERS ARE BUSY EXAMINING THE BODIES, YOU DECIDE TO VISIT LOCAL BAR AND DRINK SOME OF THE FAMED CHINESE BEER MADE FROM RICE! (3) IT'S A DECENT BOOZE! (2) A SOLDIER ENTER THE BAR IN SEARCH OF YOU, TELLS YOU TO HURRY, SINCE THE MILITARY HAS RECEIVED NEW ORDERS TO QUICKLY REINFORCE THE CITY'S CENTER! (6) YOU HURRY TO THE METRO STATION, VOMITING ON THE WAY FROM BEING DRUNK AS FUCK! ALSO, AN OFFICER YELLED AT YOU FOR DRINKING DURING MARTIAL LAW!

Grab their walkie-talkies and whack them with it! I don't actually have a pun for this!

(5-1 VS 5) FRANCIS ATTEMPTS TO STAND UP, BUT GETS SMASHED IN THE FACE WITH AN ELECTRO-BATON! FRANCIS' FACE IS BURNT BY HIGH VOLTAGE! OUCH! ALSO, 5 TURNS UNTIL THE DS REINFORCEMENTS ARRIVE!

MOVE REINFORCEMENTS TO THE CITY CENTER/COMCAST HQ!

THE MILITARY IS REGROUPING, AND THE REINFORCEMENTS WILL ARRIVE AT THE COMCAST HQ IN (6) TURNS!

MOVE TO THE CITY CENTER, ATTACKING EVERY POTENTIAL ENEMY!

(3+2) THE CAT ARMY ARRIVES AT THE CITY CENTER, NOTICING AN UNCONSCIOUS HUMAN AND SEVERAL HUMANS ASSAULTING THE COMCAST HQ!

[Ozarck]

Sally awaits the arrival of the Elevator to the level on which the servers are located. She hums along with the elevator's piped in music.

"This is nice."

[King Zultan]

Get on the train and ride to the destination.

[Yoink]

OH RIGHT, I FORGOT I WAS UNCONSCIOUS.

WAKE UP! GROGGILY PROFESS UNDYING LOVE FOR NURSE WHO SAVED MY LIFE!

...UNLESS THEY A MALE NURSE, IN WHICH CASE BREAK HIS JAW FOR TOUCHING MY CHEST WHILE I ASLEEP OFFER MANLY NOD OF THANKS BEFORE GETTING BACK TO GRATUITOUS ASSKICKING

[The_Two_Eternities]

Make a run for the zoo! Something something political expediency?

[Screech9791]

>Shoot any security forces, and use the buckshot from my underbarrel shotgun to open up walls to breach through. Also use explosive charges and breaching rounds for grenade launchers for making new doorways to go through.

[Doomblade187]

SEND SCOUT TO FIND TOWER WHERE CROC AND BEAR LOVER IS BEING HELD!

[CABL]

>Shoot any security forces, and use the buckshot from my underbarrel shotgun to open up walls to breach through. Also use explosive charges and breaching rounds for grenade launchers for making new doorways to go through.

I hate to break it to you, but there's already a huge breach made by you and the Yoink's mob. Also, the security on the first floor is dead, and the higher floors don't have that many guards like there was on the first floor/entrance.

Anyway, I'll post the next turn tomorrow.

[CABL]

TURN 22

Sally awaits the arrival of the Elevator to the level on which the servers are located. She hums along with the elevator's piped in music.

"This is nice."

USE BANDAGES TO HEAL MY WOUND AND STOP THE BLEEDING!

(5) WHILE SALLY HUMS THE MELODY OF ELEVATOR MUSIC, IGOR PATCHES HIMSELF UP BY SUTURING AND BANDAGING HIS TORSO! BOTH THE PAIN AND THE BLEEDING HAVE STOPPED! (2) UPON LEAVING THE ELEVATOR, A HIDDEN CAMERA DETECTS SALLY AND IGOR, WHICH RESULTS IN A FORCE FIELD LOCKDOWN OF THE DOORS TO THE SERVER ROOM!

Get on the train and ride to the destination.

(1) THE SQUAD GETS ON THE SUBWAY TRAIN TO THE CITY CENTER/COMCAST HQ! UNFORTUNATELY, IT LOOKS THAT SOME RESISTANCE CELL USED THE CHAOS IN THE CITY TO THEIR ADVANTAGE, LAYING DOWN PLASMA BOMBS ON SUBWAY'S TRACKS! THE TRAIN EXPLODES BEFORE ALMOST REACHING THE DESTINATION, (5) WITH ONLY BILLY MIRACULOUSLY SURVIVING THE EXPLOSION WITHOUT SLIGHTEST SCRATCH!

OH RIGHT, I FORGOT I WAS UNCONSCIOUS.

WAKE UP! GROGGILY PROFESS UNDYING LOVE FOR NURSE WHO SAVED MY LIFE!

...UNLESS THEY A MALE NURSE, IN WHICH CASE BREAK HIS JAW FOR TOUCHING MY CHEST WHILE I ASLEEP OFFER MANLY NOD OF THANKS BEFORE GETTING BACK TO GRATUITOUS ASSKICKING

SEND SCOUT TO FIND TOWER WHERE CROC AND BEAR LOVER IS BEING HELD!

(2+1) YOU AWAKE WITH YOUR VISION BEING EXTREMELY BLURRY! (1) YOINK THEN PROCLAIMS UNDYING LOVE TO THE NURSE WHO SAVED HIM: WITH HIS BLURRY VISION, HE SEES THE NURSE AS A HOT BRUNETTE WOMAN, BUT IT TURNS OUT THE NURSE IS A MAN! (5) NURSE REALIZES THAT YOINK IS BEFUDDLED FROM AWAKENING, GIVING HIM A SLIGHT SHAKEUP, MAKING YOINK'S VISION CLEAR!

(2) EVERYONE IN THE YOINK'S MOB BUSY CAUSING MAYHEM IN THE HQ BY TOPPLING VARIOUS FURNITURE, SO NO ONE IS INTERESTED IN VOLUNTEERING FOR SCOUTING DUTIES!

Make a run for the zoo! Something something political expediency?

(5-1 VS 4) FRANCIS BULL RUSHES ONE OF THE DEATH SQUAD MEMBERS, CRIPPLING HIS SPINE! FRANCIS THEN GETS SHOT IN THE FOOT WITH A TRANQUILIZER DART! (1-1) RUNNING AWAY HALF-BLINDLY, FRANCIS FALLS DOWN THROUGH AN OPEN MANHOLE, BREAKING HIS LEGS! FRANCIS ALSO FEELS SLEEPY! 4 TURNS TILL THE DEATH SQUAD REINFORCEMENTS ARRIVE!

>Shoot any security forces, and use the buckshot from my underbarrel shotgun to open up walls to breach through. Also use explosive charges and breaching rounds for grenade launchers for making new doorways to go through.

(1) HAVING NO EXPLOSIVES, 0CRA PUNCHES THE WALL, (1) BREAKING HIS RIGHT KNUCKLE! (4-1) WHILE IT'S HARD TO HOLD A MACHINE IN ONE HAND, 0CRA IS PREPARED TO FACE REMAINING SECURITY ON THE UPPER FLOORS! (4 VS 3) 0CRA AND THE WOMAN FROM RESISTANCE NOTICE AN ACTIVE LASER TURRET: 0CRA MISSES MOST OF HIS SHOTS, AND THE WOMAN DEALS THE MOST DAMAGE TO IT! THE OPTICS AND HULL SUFFER SEVERE DAMAGE, WHICH CAUSES IT TO SPEW RED LASERS IN ALL DIRECTIONS! 0CRA AND THE RESISTANCE WOMAN DODGE AND HIDE IN A CORNER!

MILITARY REINFORCEMENTS: 5 TURNS LEFT UNTIL ARRIVAL AT THE COMCAST HQ!

STRIKE THE COMCAST HQ DOWN WITH MY PAW!

(1+2 VS 2) FELIUS THRASHES THE BUILDING WITH HIS MIGHTY PAW, BREAKING A LOT OF WINDOWS AND TEARING THE MIDDLE FLOORS' FLOOR APART!

[The_Two_Eternities]

Command whatever animals might be in the sewers to attack the death squad members.

[Screech9791]

>Patch up my right hand, then use my M249 and it's underbarrel shotgun to open up new murderholes and also break the turret. If we find another one, hack it to make it so that a resistance member can use it as a camera with a gun.

[King Zultan]

Gather all the guns from the dead death squad members and combine them in to a super gun.

[Yoink]

PLACEHOLDER ACTION: FIND AN INJURED ENEMY PERSON, ENSURE THEY UNARMED, THEN POLITELY ASK FOR DIRECTIONS TO SUNRISE TOWER
IF THEY REFUSE TO HELP, TICKLE THEM MERCILESSLY. ALL WHILST DEFENDING SELF AND COMPANIONS FROM ANY ATTACKS USING MY SPARE HAND.

OH AND SMASH ANY PINGAS I HAPPEN TO HAVE ON MY PERSON, AS SUGGESTED BY POLL ABOVE