Was without internet for a fair bit again. Still, at least this didn't take a whole week. Will try to raise my standards a bit more. I don't have an action from Failbird, but I'll just auto them this one time. Firing the fission cannon at the acid soaked weak spot sort of seems like a no brainer.
Initiatives:
EDGECAT PIRATE MECHA SHIP: 7+3=10
EPM-SC: 4+4=8
Captain Nico: 7+1=8
George Washington: 4+2=6
Captain [REDACTED]: 4+1=5
DOOM CRUISER: 6-3=3
>Shoot the fore using edge guns before grabbing an upgrade.
2: One of the edgeguns is still jammed! You don't manage to clear it yet.
6+2v3-3, 2+2v3-3, 3+2v6-3, Armor 8+3, 7+3, 4+3: The spiky exploding projectiles break open hull of the DOOM CRUISER for 120 damage. After, you finally clear the jam. The upgrade happens.
"Hull at 35% of its full integrity! Which means there is only one sensible thing to do:"
Tear open a path with the KATANA CLAWS by following the Edge Guns' wake!
7+4, 8+3: The KATANA CLAWS tear at the stern of the DOOM CRUISER, devastating it for 650 damage. The Ship Ram is now fully charged!
FIRE THE HARPOOOOOONS, USE THE CAT-EARS TO FIND OPENINGS, AND THEN SHOOT BOARDING PODS AT THEM! [I'll shoot ones with people with rifles in them later, FB.] ALSO, RUM/BOOZE.
(It was just the one rifle. Not multiple. It is a really good one though.)
You down a bottle of booze. That's the stuff. No one else partakes.
3+4: You scan the cruiser, trying to detect any place you could shoot your pods. A few weak spots creates by previous attacks reveal themselves to you, and you open fire! (Armor temporarily reduced by 2 for you.)
3+4v7-3+4v4-3,4+4v8-3 Armor 4+1, 8+1, 1+1: The boarding pods soar toward the doom cruiser, and smash through the weakened defenses! All the men unload and join the remaining squad from before. 150 damage.
Fire a Molten Plasma Missile at where we are going to chomp into
4+4v7-3, Armor 8+3: The missile is unleashed, and sails into the DOOM CRUISER's keel for 230 damage. Things are really heating up over there now.
Open fire with the plasma-magma gun on the keel, continuing to try and tunnel through the thick hull to the dimensional ripper module, it can't be allowed to remain. Scan for other systems that we might be able to hit along the way to soften up the cruiser further.
2+4: You scan the cruiser to see if there are any other nearby modules. It actually finds something interesting nearby.
2+4v4-3, Armor 5+3: The plasma-magma gun fires off at the keel, searing yet more of the armor of that section of the ship. 250 damage. The heat is near maximum!
What's next is fairly obvious. PLANETARY BOMBARDMENT! EAT IT! Then use the claws again.
-100%: The nations of the PLANET get together and coordinate a launch of ALL their missiles. Every single one. All aimed at the DOOM CRUISER. They're now traveling through the solar system, enroaching on the target that menaces the people of THE PLANET. They'll arrive at the end of the turn.
7+3: Afterwards, you fly back in and swing your claws for 100 damage.
Drive up closer to the Doom Cruiser and fire the hood mounted guns and the roof rifle at the closest looking weak point.
(Sometimes I wonder why I bother showing the aim/dodge rolls. The DOOM CRUISER has only ever dodged like three times. Should I stop? I do definitely like the thing I did by putting Armor rolls on the same line at least. That was a long time coming.)
7+2v8-3, 5+2v8-3, 2+2v5-3 Armor 8+3, 8+3, 7+3: You drive through the void of space, mounted guns at the ready. You're not sure you see any particularly weak spots, but firing at the acid soaked stern seems a good idea. This deals 50 damage.
2+2v3-3 Armor 1+3: You follow up with the roof rifle! It penetrates the stern for 120 damage!
Fire the cannon at the weak spot for massive damage!
4+3v7-3: Your crew finally finishes writing up all the forms they need to authorize firing the anomalous cannon you technically are supposed to just transport. At your behest, the cannon unleashes a truly devastating projectile at the DOOM CRUISER's stern. The area is atomized by the power of nuclear fission to an absurd degree, taking 650 damage! The cannon will be fully reloaded at the start of turn 10.
Squad action: 3v2, 6v8, 7v1, 1v1: A few men are killed on arrival, but the squads annihilate many of the internal systems of the DOOM CRUISER! 800 damage. The acid is now gone.
Finally, the PLANETARY BARRAGE arrives! The DOOM CRUISER reacts to the huge threat by acting out of turn, firing countless varieties of weapon to try and shoot down the incoming missiles. Though they are largely successful, there's simply too many missiles to shoot down! Countless atomic explosions erupt all over the DOOM CRUISER's hull! A veritable storm of metal and other materials flies off of the DOOM CRUISER, filling the battlefield with an extreme amount of debris. 5000 damage dealt.
A mysterious automatic system is engaged within the DOOM CRUISER, and a powerful signal is sent out. Who knows what that was for? Furthermore, an auto-repair system appears to have been engaged. A great many drones exit the DOOM CRUISER, trying to put it back together! Don't let that happen!
3020 damage was dealt by players this turn! 61% SQUAD POWER CHARGE has been added!
Players:
Pilots: Captain Blackbeard, Pilot Varkan, and MIDNIGHT EDGEMAN
Description: The EDGECAT PIRATE MECHA SHIP is a fusion of three ships. It takes a large, roughly humanoid shape. The head is red and spiky, under the control of Captain Blackbeard! Eclipsing the craft on both sides are a pair of enourmous power fists guarded by gauntlets and tipped by claws mode of katanas. The remnants of Blackbeard's Ship Ram are also mounted on the outer edges of this awesome vehicle, and can be combined for an attack once charged. All this is controlled by Pilot Varkan! The body is highly bulky and spiked all around, protected by a trenchcoat. An extra pair of arms hold the EDGY GUNS. This area is under the control of MIDNIGHT EDGEMAN! The whole vehicle is covered in red and black paint, with a cape reminiscent of a nautical sail.
Hull: 350/1000
Shields: 500/500
Regen: 100
Aim: +2(+1)
Armor: +2(+1)
Dodge: +1(+2)
Initiative: +3 (+1)
Equipment:
Captain Blackbeard controls:
Cat-Ear Radar: A small scanning array. Not very powerful, but also improves dodge by 1 due to detecting incoming attacks.
Space Harpoon Gun: Does a little damage and stabilizes the ship. Can be used to tow ships or be towed. 50 damage per hit. Can be fired three times per turn. Best at close range. Now shoulder mounted, and can be reeled in at high speed to slightly boost melee damage.
Boarding Guns: These fire pods containing crew members into the target. Said pods are tipped by drills. 6 ammo, can't be replenished easily. Damage varies, but is highest against weakened areas. The DOOM CRUISER's thickest armor won't be penetrated by this weapon yet. 3 shots per turn. Best at close range.
Super Space Booze: Emboldens the pilots, giving them a +1 to most actions. Lasts 2 turns. Does not stack. Can be declined. 4 bottles. Active Blackbeard until end of next turn.
Pilot Varkan Controls:
Katana-Claw Powerfists: This system accounts for a huge amount of this robot's mass. It is a giant pair of arms mounted to the vehicles sides. The fists are guarded by gauntlets and tipped with three claws each in the form of the katana from EDGEMAN's ship. Swings twice per turn, and inflicts 300 damage. If swung at full force, can punch so hard it rips space. Extremely powerful, but strenuous. 67% charged.
Ship Ram: A truly humongous mounted spear. It is split into two halves, which each half attached to the outermost part of one of the Powerfists. They can be merged into a powerful ramming weapon at the cost of all other actions. Deals massive damage and reduces armor on hit, but can't be used consecutively. 100% charged.
MIDNIGHT EDGEMAN controls:
EDGY GUNS: A painful looking pair of red and black guns. They launch spikes that embed into the target and explode. 50 damage per hit. Each fires up to 3 shots per turn. Best at short or mid range. 12 ammo. The smaller arms of the EDGY FIGHTER CRAFT OF EDGE are mounted beneath the vastly larger power fists.
EDGY AOE: On command, this vehicle shoots out spikes from all over its body like a pufferfish to attack all nearby enemies! 300 damage. 3 turn cooldown.
EDGY COAT: Can be activated to reinforce defenses by posing dramatically. 3 turn cooldown. Now worn by the entire machine.
Auto:
Spinning Blades: A series of sharp circling blades that line this vehicle. Inflicts about 75 damage to nearby targets every turn, possibly more.
DEATH RECHARGER: Destroying ships recovers 100 points of hull and shield if done at close range. Halved otherwise.
Pilots: E.P.A.S. AI and Darkwarlock3
Description: This ship, the Experimental Plasma-Magma Chomper and Scanner Corvette (EPM-SC) is a synthetic ship that runs extremely hot, and is coated all over in magma and plasma. Just being close to it is unpleasant. It boasts support capabilities and weapons that'll heat up the target.
Hull: 500/500
Shields: 400/400
Regen: 50 base +25 hull and shields when above 200 hull.
Aim: +1(+3)
Armor: +1(+3)
Dodge: +1(+3)
Initiative: +1(+3)
Equipment:
Experimental Scanner: Scans targets for information. Can reveal sub-system locations. Very powerful, but results may not be perfectly accurate.
Plasmagma Gun: Fires a single 200 damage bolt of plasma. Heats up the target. Fired at low velocity, so it works best at close or mid range.
Eruption Shot: Fires molten rock at the target. 3 shot burst. 50 damage per hit. Inflicts heat. Best at close to mid range.
Molten Plasma Missile: Superheated projectiles that immensely heat up the target. 175 damage. 5 ammo. One shot per turn.
Plasmagma Chomper: A super-heated weapon at the front of the ship coated with magma and plasma. Shaped like a powerful jaw, it rips into targets effortlessly. 250 damage+50 to highly heated targets. Inflicts heat. Restores hull by 50 on kill.
Name: Captain Nico
Description: Feline Optimization Engineering Vessel. The Feline Optimization Engineering Vessel is a humanoid ship that can augment other ships with feline parts. It also has a repair function.
Hull: 250/350
Shields: 250/250
Regen: 50
Aim: +1(+1)
Armor: +2(+1)
Dodge: +0(+2)
Initiative: +0(+1)
Equipment:
Catastrophe Cannon: Launches cubes of condensed cat meat at absurd speeds. Why? Because it can. 200 damage per hit. 0 ammo. Best at short or mid range.
Claws: These work as you'd expect. 100 damage.
Cat-Ear Radar: A small scanning array. Not very powerful, but also improves dodge by 1 due to detecting incoming attacks.
Repair Kit: Comes with 500 metal. Restores 1 hull to the target for each point of metal used. Non-Organic ammo can also be refilled.
Augmentation Machine: Allows the attachment of Claws and Cat-Ear Radar to a ship. 1 use left.
Name: Agent [REDACTED]
Description: SCP Anomaly Esoteric Transport Carrier
The SCP Anomaly Esoteric Transport Carrier is a ship built by the SCP Foundation. It wasn't supposed to show up in this universe, but that's just how anomalies are sometimes. Protect humanity!
Hull: 300/300
Shields: 200/200
Regen: 50
Aim: +3
Armor: +2 (+1)
Dodge: -1 (+1)
Intiative: +1
Equipment:
Cat-Ear Radar: A small scanning array. Not very powerful, but also improves dodge by 1 due to detecting incoming attacks.
Claws: These work as you'd expect. 100 damage.
44: World War II Era Molecular-Fission Cannon. 500 damage, but takes 3 turns to reload. 5 ammo. Best at close range.
148 Armor: This ship is lightly coated with Telekill Alloy. This keeps the anomalous properties of this ship localized, and also protects it slightly from a variety of things.
914 Replica: Can modify objects according to the rules of said SCP. GM decides results. Starts with generic materials that the player can define. Veto allowed.
914 materials: Loaded Helicopter Missile Pod, A Grenade Launcher, Four grenades, Rifle ammunition, A toy robot, A space suit. One bottle of space booze.
914 results: None on board.
2722 Parts: Sub systems copied or recovered from a curious space ship.
Instance 12-1131: A set of laser point-defence systems, mounted on the outside of the hull, each 1 meter in diameter. Each capable of power in excess of █████ kW. Consumes shields.
Instance 93-0983: Roughly spherical automatons equipped with nanometric motile parts acting as drones of various sections. Drones able to adhere to most surfaces, perform delicate repair and cleaning tasks. Internal storage seems to act as a valid chemical reactor. Extremely efficient, able to self-repair, grow in size and replicate through a mechanical "mitosis" after a period of growth. Automatically repairs hull by 50 each turn.
Anomalous Transport: This ship is carrying a variety of things are simply not meant to be. Damaging or destroying this ship may have metaphysical consequences.
Name: George Washington
Description: 1978 Lincoln Continental Car Guns
Hull: 100/100
Shields: 200/200
Regen: 50
Aim: +2
Armor: -1
Dodge: +1
Initiative: +2
Equipment:
Hood Machine Guns: Not from the hood, but on the hood. 15 damage per hit. A three shot burst from each for a total of six shots.
Rear Machine Guns: The same as above, but pointed backwards. It'd be quite the feat to hit the same enemy with both of these on the same turn. Drifting recommended.
Roof Rifle: Not quite a railgun, but fairly strong. Can swivel in any direction, but requires the car to be stable to fire. 100 damage. 5 shots.
Missile Mounts: Hidden beneath the body of the car. One missile can be fired per turn for 120 damage. These have a homing effect. 6 shots.
Flares: Pop these to dissuade attackers. Can be activated automatically. Only one use.
Time Machine: Obviously Washington used this to get here somehow. Probably an interesting tale, but this isn't his story. Anyway, this time machine only goes forward. Be careful what turn you choose to arrive on. Has a cooldown of 3 turns after the car arrives.
Next attack on turn 8.
Health: 6,620/25,000
Stats:
Aim: +0
Armor: +3
Dodge: -3
Initiative: -3
Known Weapons and Equipment:
Medium machine guns: THE DOOM CRUISER fires many medium machine guns. 24 attacks at random targets, 25 damage per hit. -2 to aim.
Heavy machine guns: THE DOOM CRUISER fires many heavy machine guns. 24 attacks at random targets, 50 damage per hit. -2 to aim.
Full machine gun barrage!: THE DOOM CRUISER fires both sets of machine guns! No multi attack penalty. Still -2 to aim.
DOOM REPAIR: THE DOOM CRUISER launches a fleet of nanobots to repair damage to it. The ships of destroyed players will be used for materials. This status lasts for 4 turns, or until the players cancel it. THE DOOM CRUISER doesn't heal very fast, but every bit counts.
DOOM DRONES: THE DOOM CRUISER deploys 6 drones to attack the party! Drones have 100hp, no shields, and a light machine gun. They have +1 to dodge and initiative.
DOOM MISSILES: THE DOOM CRUISER launches a whole bunch of missiles! 15 attacks at random targets, 80 damage per hit. +1 to aim. (-1 to aim.) Location: Stern. Destroyed.
DOOM ARMAGEDDON: THE DOOM CRUISER fires 3 powerful homing nuclear missiles at random targets! Those targets almost certainly die if they get hit. I'll tell you the damage if it is relevant. The team has 1 turn to shoot down/jam/redirect/delay them. +4 to aim. (-1 to aim.) Location: Stern. Destroyed.
DOOM EMP: THE DOOM CRUISER fires an electromagnetic pulse, potentially disabling many ship components! May inflict damage directly. Location: Keel.
DOOM PARTICLE BEAMS: THE DOOM CRUISER fires a blast of tiny particles at relativistic speeds! Particle beams ignore almost all defenses. 12 attacks at random targets, 100 damage per hit. +4 to aim. Located in the fore.
DOOM DIMENSION RIP: THE DOOM CRUISER fires a weapon that tears space itself to attack every ship on the field! all valid players take 1 nigh unavoidable attack for 300 damage. Located deep in the middle of the keel.
Ranges:
Blackbeard, Varkan, MIDNIGHT: Close to fore
E.P.A.S. AI, Darkwarlock3: Close below keel
Captain Niko: Close to fore
Agent [REDACTED]: Close to fore
George Washington: Close to fore.
SQUAD POWER: 68%
Buffs and Debuffs:
DOOM CRUISER:
Repair Drone Fleet: Numbers 12 drones. Each requires 100 damage to destroy, and will repair the DOOM CRUISER's hull by 100 points per turn by salvaging nearby scrap metal.
Boarded: Will take damage over time based on crew competence. 4 squads on board.
Heated up: Large increase to damage caused by hot attacks to the stern and keel.
Notes: We're entering last stand territory here now. Best of luck to you all. Also that "probably 500 hull per turn" thing on the repair drones was severely out of date and I'm a little embarrassed I let it slip through into the final turn data. That'll be corrected. At any rate, you're able to outpace the new value even if none of them are destroyed.
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Topic: DOOM CRUISER 2 ELECTRIC BOOGALOO: Turn 7: PLANETARY BARRAGE (Read 21458 times)