Turn 24Cast a horrible face melting curse on the cowardly traitors in my cult. Attempt to bolster my realm even further.
3,4You detect betrayal from some of your followers and issue the only punishment such a crime can have. You're a little distracted at the moment, so you aren't able to really make it fancy. You sense the traitors faces simply fall off, followed by their heads. You then return to the more important work of protecting your dominion. Clouds roll overhead, their tendrils desperately grasping for prey as you force them together. Your realm is thoroughly protected now. The only way the Sun could hurt it is by destroying the rest of the planet around it.
"Get out of here and give up your evil ways and I'll spare you, if you don't I'll destroy you."
Look at all of the equipment I haven't destroyed to see if I can use it to find out where Goatsby is currently.
3You command the cultists to turn over a new leaf. Their response is best described as...ambiguous. Their faces fall off and then their heads. Moving on, you try to find Goatsby. You don't quite have the occult experience to make sense of it all, but you determine that Goatsby is roughly on the other side of the world.
"Wait a second is a Martheus?"
Distract the woman for a second via pointing her dress and naming an dead famous tailor. Use that second to double stab her.
4, 6+2 vs 5The woman slowly walks toward you, but stops to consider your question.
"Actually, yes...I got it from my-" While she's distracted, you dart in for a pair of quick stabs to the gut with your double swords. She shrieks in rage and the shadow pours forth toward you. It bypasses the impressively shiny armor.
Continue polishing, blissfully unaware of the presence behind me. I must achieve radiance.
3+1 for previous successYou polish yourself to radiant glory. Your plates are now bright enough to be the pride of any noble tourney. The question of course strikes you-Could you be even shinier? Could you be the one to uncover yet undiscovered heights of radiance that have never before been seen in this world?
"Okay, guys. Our next destination is Castle Adjilia. I'll lead the way!"
Lead the way, try to avoid bandits and other hazards.
5+1Help by providing light, protection and healing magic in the way
6Alright, let’s get going! If any bandits or similar annoyances try to attack us along the way, make it their last mistake.
3The party sets forth, now certain of their destination. Anna leads the way and the Pail's magic helps the party past certain natural obstacles. The light and chanting of the mug attracts bandits at one point, but Aaron eagerly stomps through them. It's not their last mistake. Some are just severely injured and live on. They use their new lease on life to abandon banditry and find legitimate work. However, they accidentally waste all their gold on dubious real estate purchases.
Anna leads the group across a log bridge and over a hill to see Castle Adjilia below. The sky is red and crackling with lightning here. An unholy light glows from the keep. The ground outside is littered with the remains of endless battle. You approach from behind the attacking lines. One of the invaders is leaning against a tree in exhaustion. When you get close, you realize he's a skeleton, with flames emerging from within his armor. In fact, everyone you can see is cursed with such a form. They seems much more sentient than the others you've encountered. The soldier notices your approach with relief.
"You! You're...Uncursed! How did you find this place? This is Castle Adjilia, the place of our torment.
Once, long ago, we fought a war here. It was for something...foolish, I think. It's been so long. The defenders were throwing such strange defenders at us. We hit them back, too. We had...a weapon, of some sort. Everything changed when the Unholy Pail arrived. One of the defenders called the thing. It certainly kept them from losing. It cursed us. Every day, we go to war again. We march, they man the walls, and the battle goes on until the Pail is summoned and it all starts again. We cannot break the cycle. But you, perhaps you could save us? Either join us, or fight for them. No matter which you choose, the siege must be broken before the Pail returns or you will be trapped with us. I beg you, please, save us! SAVE US!"
After his longwinded speech, the soldier runs screaming into the battlefield and is torn to pieces by a similarly undead elk.
Run away from the forest fire back to the alchemy hut, leave the athame and take the probably milk and run off back to the village.
5You deftly escape the flames and leap in a graceful roll through the alchemist's window. You toss the athame into a prominent location for display and snatch up the spider milk with your other hand. You don't spill any as you flip through the opposite window and slide down a hill into the village and land in a cool pose that causes a flock of doves to fly away around you.
-Snipped out zombie-bear stuff.-
(HONESTLY, IRL I SHED A SINGLE, JOYOUS TEAR AT THE SHEER BADASSERY OF THIS AS I READ IT. BRAVO.)
MAKE AN EXPLORATORY ATTEMPT TO CAREFULLY CUT DOWN A SMALLISH TREE USING MY MAKESHIFT AXE. PONDER WHETHER MY NEWLY-ZOMBIFIED BEAR PALS WOULD FIT INTO MY STEAM WAGON.
(Thanks, I appreciate hearing that. Things like that are what make these games worth running.)
3The porcelain axe snaps as you do it, but you do successfully knock over a small tree. You also consider seeing if your bears fit into the wagon. It occurs to you that they were originally circus bears as you turn around to find them already arranged into a neat pyramid in the back of the wagon.
Cast Stone to Flesh on the Moon, in hopes that it will fight back against the Sun.
3You target the Moon with Stone to Flesh. For a little over a second, you don't see any change. Then, it warps into a hideous mass of living flesh. A giant mouth and blinking eyes form over the usual Man in the Moon image. It looks down at you as you try to explain the war against the Sun.
"I don't know, man. I'm not really into violence, you know? It's not cool what the Sun's doing to you, but I can't see why I have the right to tell it how to live."A ray of heat and flame then lances out at you from the Sun. You barely manage to Shapechange into a fire elemental, saving yourself from incineration. The blast still hurts and shoves you into the ground.
>Grab a toolbox
3There don't seem to be any full toolboxes around, but whoever buried you left his shovel and the hammer used to nail your grave marker together. You take them.
I believe you're still accepting new players
Name: William
Description: Nod cultist
Why do you want milk? Kane requires Milk for his "waffles", what ever those may be William does not know.
Set out from the presence of Kane in search of milk or cows to buy or steal.
(I am indeed taking new players. Also, KANE LIVES.)
6You are William, of the Brotherhood of Nod. The Prophet has ordered you to go and acquire milk. You take up your sword and head out. The first possible location you find is a farm with several cows milling about. It doesn't look like the people who run this place intend to give it up easily. Wooden stakes face outward in all directions, a crude moat has been dug, and pit traps can be seen to dot the area. On the farthest outskirts, you see skeletons wearing signs commanding all outsiders to "LEAVE OR BE SHOT". Each sign is written in English, French, German, Arabic, and Chinese.
"This absurdity shall not continue!"
Use mug demon powers to punch Luck in the face and mug them for control of my die rolls.
(No roll, due to potentially unexpected complication. If you still want to do this, I'll give you an updated turn.)
*(Later edit, he decided to try and go through with it. Rolling to find Aaron.)
You consider punching out Luck and taking its lunch money, but then you sense a presence that might cause you to reconsider. Aaron Blaze, the god of luck, will likely put up a major fight to defend his domain. You'll have to take him down to get to Luck. Do you want to do this anyway?
4You decide to do it. You use the powers of a mug demon to sense the location of the guardian you must defeat and teleport to him. You find yourself above a corrupted battlefield near a castle.
Hold on, if I can use the power of belief to become god of the sun, then that means...
I have to try this.
Order the sun to attack Goatsby instead and then, use the power of belief to become god of MILK!
1+1, 6You try commanding the Sun to go after Goatsby.
"Yes, master...NO! No, I don't want to! I think I'll kill the elf now." The Sun then ignores you and launches a micro-solar flare at some point on Earth. Being the sun god hasn't been very helpful so far. You decide to change up your domain. The people's faith doesn't help you here. They believed in you in the hopes you would save them, and this doesn't have much to do with that. Your subconscious is thus forced to come up with the milk deity form on its own. It goes too far. You briefly lose awareness. When you come back, you sense flames around you. You also realize your limbs are gone, and your skin is hard and cold. You're also a lot bigger than before. Then the terrible truth hits. You've become a Doom Mug powered by divinity. Your consciousnesses rebel at the thought, but their shared body is currently hurtling toward the Earth. Someone flies up and punches you, which slows your momentum somewhat.
(You can still think and try to take actions to stop this, your mind is just trapped inside the Doom Mug.)
[Fair enough.]
Wait and watch. If anyone starts dooming the world, beat them until they die. Thos conflict may work itself out, then I can go back to my wandering.
6 vs 1Another Doom Mug appears in the sky. That seems like a big enough threat to warrant your attention. You fly up and give it a good warmup punch. The thing is cracked and slowed, but still oncoming. Strange that you didn't sense any ATHATHs involved with this one.
Sun Action:Attack Vaarsuvius4 vs 2Narrowly managing to ignore Adam's authority, the Sun decides to go nuke the fleshling that annoyed it before. The creature survives with injuries.
6 turns to Doom Mug Adam impact