You decide that the noisy chair has to go.
Picking up the essays, you march back into the living room, heading straight towards Lord Woodenheim with merciless determination. You shall make an example out of him to put the others in line. Just like what you always done to delinquent students.
"What has gotten into you, wizard!?" Lord Woodenheim stammers as you take hold of him by the crest rail.
"Need I remind you who is master of the household!? Unhand me at once!"Now, how does this work again? You ponder for a moment as the hapless chair wiggles in your unyielding grasp.
Ah yes, an entropic binding spell should do.You place the essays on the table and take out your wand as you begin to prepare the ritual, magically binding Lord Woodenheim to the desecrated essays.
"S-sir Oakenbord of the Four Legs, aid me immediately! You must obey your lord! Together we can dethrone the wizard and rule this place together!"As the chair to the north looks slyly at its distressed cohort, you take the chance to root out any and all furnitures who may be tending towards dissidence.
"All of you, listen up! Either announce your loyalty to me, or join Lord Woodenheim in utter annihilation!" You yell to the other furnitures, your voice ringing with ruthless ferocity.
"If you wish to live, make your fealty known, now!"After a few short seconds of what seemed like gloating, the northern chair Sir Oakenbord quickly announces his allegiance to you.
"I am with you, Master Jess, one hundred percent. Strike down this villainous cur for all to see!""What!? You scheming son of a log!" screams a desperate and struggling Lord Woodenheim.
"Anyone else!? Declare your allegiance now, or pay the wooden price!" You narrow your eyes at the suspicious chair under the table, who has kept its quiet for too long now.
The seemingly inanimate creature soon hops to life, knowing of its dire situation.
"Err--y-yes, I-I am with you as well! May the, uh, the chair god, b-bless you! On your, uh, y-your wizardly throne!" It squeaks in a strange voice. You narrow your eyes some more, still a bit suspicious of its odd behavior, but satisfied by its response.
The table soon announces its allegiance to you as well.
"Oh yeah me too I'm with you too.""Looks like it's just going to be you, Lord Woodenheim." You look to the angry panicced chair in your grasp.
"It's time... to meet your Maker!"In a swift motion, you throw Lord Woodenheim to the floor, and, pointing your wand at him, utter the final words that the chair would hear.
"Entropicatus decicras!""N-NOO--!"*FROOM!*In an instant, the fallen chair bursts into a firework of sparks and ashes. The shiny little particles float around the room for a bit before gathering near the essays, soon becoming a part of the papers as the missing sections are restored. Several moments later, nothing remained of the loudmouthed chair, and the essays had returned to their previous, unmauled condition.
So I guess that is
how magic really works. You let out a sigh of relief and of a job well done.
You soon take a glance at the reassembled essays; they are for the new course that you are teaching this semester, 'Advanced Death Magic for Beginners', which is part of the General Arcane Studies faculty.
You ponder the reason why such a class wouldn't be reserved for students of necromancy, and why the school would let a teacher of General Arcane Studies be teaching that of all things. Is the principal and the school board behind this? They can't be bothered to pay actual necromancers to teach and just let the least paid teachers do it instead?
You consider quitting this teaching gig... but if you quit, how would you get your 'recreational substances'? Alcohol doesn't just grow on trees!
...Maybe you could become an adventurer? Sure that's a somewhat dangerous career that might not be economically stable. But at least that beats what you get from teaching. And you are a well experienced wizardess, you would do fine with dungeon delving.
You continue to ponder the possibilities of a career change as you absent-mindedly read and grade the papers written by freshman wizards, many of them part of the local gangs no doubt, expressing their avid curiosity and interest in mastering advanced death magic.
Jess Bluethorn
Health: Excellent, Somewhat drunk
Equipment:
- Master Wizard's Hat
- Master Wizard's Robes
- Master Wizard's Wand
- Magic Watch
- Silken Shoes
Inventory:
- 120 Gold
- Bumbleton Arcane University Teacher's ID
- Finer Tastes Cult Insignia
Feel free to control any characters, create any events anywhere, or make any kinds of suggestions you want!> Optional: Do you have any previous experience with adventuring and dungeon-delving? Are there any places in particular you'd like to go adventuring to?> Optional: Who/what is the chair mimic, and what are they doing here?