Summon Super Mario 64's Mario
[6] You summon a hostile Bowser.
[6 vs 6] You have managed to severely damage Bowser's eyes, but he incinerates you with his breath. Respawn?
*collect the fallen occult book from the cabbage khabala cultist.
*Use whiteout and black pen to substitute every reference to cabbage being sacred, to read how tasty it is instead.
*Use disc-world logic to alter all the magical incantations for use against heretics, such that the eating of cabbage is now the sacred thing, and those that consume said cabbage are blessed, rather than heretical.
*Jokingly cast one of the modified spells
[Auto-success] You get the book into your hands.
[3] The paper of the book is somewhat tattered from the combat, though.
[2] Somehow, you just have managed to make the book unreadable. The pages of the book are covered with whiteout and weird symbols, which look like a mish-mash of broken Modern Arabic and Ancient Hebrew. There are also individual words, which make no sense when the other parts of sentences are hidden with whiteout.
[2-1 for the tarnishing of the holy book] You alter the magical incantations. Now simply touching a cabbage without wearing Cabbage Amulet is considered blasphemy, selling cabbages is forbidden under the fear of exile, and eating cabbages is considered unforgivable sin. Bravo, you have radicalized Cabbanity!
[Auto-fail] Specify your 'modified spell' next time.
Go and gather as many cabbages as I can and put them some where safe.
[4] You have gathered 10 cabbages.
[4] You succeed!
You hide the cabbages under the local Temple of ACE.
Heavy Inquisitors ((Yes, Egan_BW, Heavy Inquisitors, not Arbiters. It's not WH.) split into four squads, 125 men each:
[2+1 for being ANGERY vs 4] Squad 1 charges at wierd, who is in turn performs some crazy acrobatics to barely escape lucerne hammers!
[1+1 vs 2-2 for exploded limbs] bloop_bleep gets brutally smashed into blood paste and thrashed innards by Squad 2. Respawn?
Squad 3 begin chanting for a summoning ritual![4+1 vs 5-1 for heavy losses] Squad 4 smash and pierce the remnants of the Bay12 army apart! The dwarves were trying to split out and flank heavy inquisitors of Squad 4, but the Squad 4 splits out too, countering the flanking!
[6 vs 6+1] Chickens do a suicide attack on Squad 1, which causes the chickens to suffer moderate losses and retreat!