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Author Topic: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Fifteen!)  (Read 20281 times)

Secheral

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Five!)
« Reply #60 on: February 02, 2018, 12:22:02 am »

"Did you not claim that the noble Capri-Sun is the gift of god? Why then do you quench your thirst on the blood of my holy brethren? I see their crumpled remains in the corner and it saddens me, yet I see no remorse in you. Someone once slowly drank my father over the course of a month. Endless agony plagued him and all I could do was watch. Was it you, monster? Does your blasphemy know no bounds? Does your heart know no mercy?
How many more must die to sate your apetite for suffering?"

Make the GM feel bad about himself so he'll put me down and give me stuff.
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King Zultan

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Five!)
« Reply #61 on: February 02, 2018, 03:10:31 am »

Forget the mountain, just wonder around hell for a bit, take some nice pictures treat it like a vacation.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

ziizo

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Five!)
« Reply #62 on: February 02, 2018, 04:33:26 am »

walk trough the hole in reality end somewhere at random.
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GG, Ziizo. May my spirit live on in your boobs.

sprinkled chariot

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Five!)
« Reply #63 on: February 02, 2018, 07:13:16 am »

Walk into star wars reality.
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Doomblade187

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Five!)
« Reply #64 on: February 02, 2018, 07:49:40 am »

Use cannon to fire self through tear in reality.
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In any case it would be a battle of critical thinking and I refuse to fight an unarmed individual.
One mustn't stare into the pathos, lest one become Pathos.

Lovefool

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #65 on: February 03, 2018, 12:00:25 am »

All people sipping Capri-Suns will die next inning! Inning Six!

Leap through the rip in the universe and travel somewhere with aliens. Any universe with aliens.

[6+1(Forgot to put the plus one in the last update, but you got a 5)=7]: You not only jump through the rip and find a universe with aliens... No... That'd be too cliche! You wanted more, so out of nowhere, you gained the ability to create one universe for yourself filled with whatever you want! Now you can date hot alien babes, like you've always wanted... But you know, you could also get rejected by the aliens too. (-1 point to your next roll)

Possess the umpire!
Good job on another unintentional reference to the OG game

[3-1=2]: You don't decide to possess anyone. You just sit absolutely still, wishing that you were still human so you could slurp on that delicious Capri-Sun... Its sweet, sugary flavor. Fruit Punch, Tropical, Strawberry Kiwi, things you will never experience ever again. It is a sad existence.

Zero

"I have no use for this timeline."

Kill myself. Respawn as a version of myself from an alternate time line where I never killed Gary.

[6+1=7]: You kill yourself in Hell. The demons all look in shock and confusion. A dead person killing themselves? It's unheard of, but you managed to do it. Your spirit passes by many dimensions, including one that is very similar to your own, and you wind up in Universe 545. A Universe where the apocalypse has already occurred, and none of your friends are anywhere to be found. But in all of this, you find a lone snail... A lone snail that is the exact same as your Gary. You take him in, and name him Gary the Second. Hopefully this time he won't betray you... but who knows? (-1 point to your next roll)

Accuse Ryden of cheating, and turn this match around!

[5]: You accuse Ryden of cheating, and successfully manage to convince, even Ryden that he cheated. So you both restart the game! John and Matt are both out, and you all have full health! Game... START!(+1 to your next roll)

[1 for John/5 for Matt]: John pitches the ball to Matt, Matt scores a homerun, resulting in John being discarded to the graveyard. Ryden has no cards on the field currently, which means he is defenseless.

Ryden
Encourage john to pummel ocean.

[2]: You can't do this action, as John has been discarded to the graveyard. You need to draw another player!

(Sorry for not explaining this earlier, but when an action is impossible it gets an automatic 2, since physically it is impossible for John to pummel Ocean since John is dead.)

"Did you not claim that the noble Capri-Sun is the gift of god? Why then do you quench your thirst on the blood of my holy brethren? I see their crumpled remains in the corner and it saddens me, yet I see no remorse in you. Someone once slowly drank my father over the course of a month. Endless agony plagued him and all I could do was watch. Was it you, monster? Does your blasphemy know no bounds? Does your heart know no mercy?
How many more must die to sate your apetite for suffering?"

Make the GM feel bad about himself so he'll put me down and give me stuff.

[6+1=7]: You make me feel so bad that I begin to worship you! I bow down to your greatness and put you on a shrine. I grab various dollar bills as offerings, and burn a lot of incense around you!

"PRAISE BE TO THE CAPRI-SUN LORD! PRAISE BE TO HIM! PRAISE BE TO THE PACIFIC COOLER FLAVOR!!"

Sadly, you can't grab any of the money offerings, as you don't have arms. (-1 to your next roll)

Forget the mountain, just wonder around hell for a bit, take some nice pictures treat it like a vacation.

[4]: You take your Hellcation, enjoying all of the different layers of hell. You found Zero's dead body on the first layer, took a selfie with it. You got to see hell frozen over in the 9th layer, You even got a picture of the Prince of Darkness himself while you were out there. You have had a pretty decent day today.

walk trough the hole in reality end somewhere at random.

[2]: You do not walk through the wormhole,  because this world's Capri-Sun is just way too good for you. You can't separate yourself from its seductive, summer flavors. It's irresistible.

Walk into star wars reality.

[1]: You attempt to do that, but then you find out the terrifying truth. As a god, you cannot leave the universe you got your powers in without either losing your godhood, or dying. This isn't going to end very well for you. (-1 to your next roll)

Use cannon to fire self through tear in reality.

[6]: This works a bit too well, as you shoot yourself into the wormhole, but wind up going through the multiverse constantly, with no stop in sight... If you keep flying around in the multiverse, it will eventually consume you, so you might wanna fix that ASAP. (-1 to your next turn)

STORY EVENT: ESCAPE FROM THIS DIMENSION!

NRDL has torn a hole into the fabric of space-time, causing this dimension to collapse in on itself! You might think that everything is hopeless, but you still have a chance to survive! Just travel to any universe of your choosing, and do it within the next inning... Or else you die! So get going

If you die, you will lose all of your current abilities.

Inning Finish!

Spoiler: Safe (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Not Safe (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: February 03, 2018, 07:33:40 am by Lovefool »
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Present Day... Heh...

Present Time... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Consider supporting my friends' SRPG project! I voice in the trailer!

Puppyguard

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #66 on: February 03, 2018, 01:17:13 am »

Ryden
Draw another card and flip through the rule book to see if I can catch ocean cheating.

[2 for Ocean/3 for Ryden]: You manage to spook Ocean enough that he decides to pull back Matt. Leaving him defenseless and ready for an attack from John!

[5 for John/3 for Ocean]: Ocean takes 2 damage to his person! He only has 2 bases left before it is game over!

(+1 to your next roll)
*Cough*
[2, no bonuses?]: You can't do this action, as John has been discarded to the graveyard. You need to draw another player!
« Last Edit: February 03, 2018, 01:22:23 am by Puppyguard »
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TamerVirus

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #67 on: February 03, 2018, 01:19:48 am »

Travel to the Jojo’s Bizarre adventure universe and become someone’s punch ghost
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What can mysteriously disappear can mysteriously reappear
*Shakes fist at TamerVirus*

Secheral

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #68 on: February 03, 2018, 01:31:34 am »

Grow limbs.
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NRDL

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #69 on: February 03, 2018, 02:55:12 am »

Create a universe filled with constantly shape shifting, ever evolving monstrosities, all of which worship me as a god.
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GOD DAMN IT NRDL.
NRDL will roll a die and decide how sadistic and insane he's feeling well you do.

sprinkled chariot

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #70 on: February 03, 2018, 04:07:18 am »

Gather up legions of undead badass romans to fix hole in space and time and stop world collapse.
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ziizo

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #71 on: February 03, 2018, 04:26:41 am »

grab duct tape and seal the hole in reality.
« Last Edit: February 03, 2018, 09:51:16 am by ziizo »
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GG, Ziizo. May my spirit live on in your boobs.

King Zultan

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #72 on: February 03, 2018, 09:26:34 am »

Wander a round hell some more, look or interesting places to go and see.
Logged
The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

GigaGiant

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #73 on: February 03, 2018, 05:52:56 pm »

Zero

"There are moments when a single snail can make the world go extinct. Reveal to me your full potential, Gary."

Teach Gary II how to use the full potential of his mind hacking abilities. Have him mind hack all of humanity, excluding myself, and order them to kill themselves.
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Insert witty signature here

Doomblade187

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Re: Batter Up! - A Minimalist Roll To Dodge (Inning Six!)
« Reply #74 on: February 03, 2018, 06:41:52 pm »

CEASE THE SPIN, STABILIZE AND DRAW ALL PLAYERS INTO MAGMAVERSE TO PLAY MAGMABALL.
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In any case it would be a battle of critical thinking and I refuse to fight an unarmed individual.
One mustn't stare into the pathos, lest one become Pathos.
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