Week 1: Go Away I'm A CucumberNji gently - but with great haste - trods towards the princess. "Welcome child. Do not scared, for you are in good and responsible hands. Now, first things first. As your first mentor I must impart to you a most vital skill for any princess, prince or member of the royal line. Now, observe." With a flourish of hands he points towards the ground and generates a mushroom with a large umbrella. In somber silence he tears it by the stem and presents it to the princess. "This shall be your weapon. The enemy is a group of bandits disguised as giant spiders in the basement. Squash them before they break and/or steal all our stuff, but be careful not to kill them. If they die, they can't pay taxes."
[2] Throughout the week, you continue to shove improbable weapons into the princess' hands and send her on noble quests. Throughout the week, she continues to stare at you like a confused puppy before being disarmed by one of your well-meaning comrades. You start to despair at her poor tax collecting abilities.
Princess: Noodle ArmedThe dragon-hybrid of dubious threat level steps forward after the mage guild receives their newest delivery, and he wastes no time in introducing himself. Actually he does, if only to puff himself up like a peacock preparing to show what he's got.
"Greetings, Princess Marcille. I am Nallihen Talandr, Black Dragon of Doom!!!" Despite the fact he's speaking, it's almost possible to count the amount of exclamation marks Nallihen used to try and put emphasis on his theoretically impressive credentials. They'd be much more impressive as soon as he showed her his amazing powers, though. "You will respect me and in return I will impart my amplearcane knowledge unto you!" Yes, it was probably better than trying to convince those damned peasants he wasn't a gigantic arctic crab.
Gods-damned peasants and their crabby cults.
Teach the princess some Vitamancy. Also use the opportunity to heal her using Vitamancy in case things go pear-shaped.
[5] The princess reacts with wonder and grace at the secrets of Vitamancy, seeming to revel in the ability to heal and empower herself and others. By the end of the week she's downright versed in the very basics!
Both: +2 Vitamancy((Goodness Cookies. Everyone else has an awesome title. Mine is slang. 
An "Instrumentalist" is okay too!
Also uh, are we...hum! What's our goal here other than taking care of the 100%-proof of human, human?
...Wait, are we wizards in the theme of 'We know many things' and treat mundane things as if they're esoteric? Because that's the dialogue-theme I've been detecting ever since, backedup by the first paragraph.
...Well! Eccentricity, ho! :3))
Cio hears the rambling of a noble, tired soul on the floor above. On this sunny day, she finds herself tidying up the mage tower (or what is left of its refurbished and remade state), whisking her air magic to get those spots of dust, dirt, and tiny nice spiders off to somewhere more beneficial for them, like the soil outside and the plants in the blooming garden. Or what should be a garden!
She climbed back upstairs, whisking her scarf around her neck, giving the princess and anyone else the image of a fashionable adventuress ready for winter, and-...stops. Nallihen seems to be taking the time to tutor the princess already!
The (planned) garden outside seemed to be a good spot, though, to start her lesson.
Cio teaches the importance of compassion--a precursor with life magic and starting up "princess' first garden" outside the mage tower, of course; these lessons are partially important everywhere else.
And, if the princess is occupied, she works on the ground floor outdoors area, training her life magic for gardening and making produce (for abstracted money in the local market!)
If I can make an action after all that--organize a timeschedule for the Princess' lessons. (Probably a regular 1d6 to help everyone lesson her up)
[1] You, ah... fail to quite imbue the feelings you were aiming for. In fact, she seems to take lectures on compassion poorly, bitterly noting her own condition instead. By the end of the week you fear you've either revealed or imparted meanspiritedness rather than compassion.
Princess: Cruel"Greetings. I am Enoch. The stars have alinged and gods have chosen you as their prophet. My duty is to educate you in the priestly magic and grant you boundless knowledge not meant for mortal minds. You will learn how to manipulate the minds of the people. You will learn how to summon abominations as slaves. You will be able to become immortal and trascend time and space. You will become a god. One of many, weak gods.
And yet, you will still be nothing compared to the rest of the universe. Because reality is unreal, the dead can never die and the eternal dreamer will wake up from the dream. We are more insignificant than vermin itself. We are nothing more than just a figment of it's imagination. And when the dreamer, the daemon-sultan eternally asleep, the mass of chaos around which grotesque beings play infernal drums and blasphemous flutes, and the blind idiot which rests on the black throne in the ultimate, nuclear chaos; when he wakes up, reality ends. And the unspeakable being will shrug it off as a bad dream. Because reality was a mistake in his eyes.
But let's stop thinking of this grim, inevitable future of our existence. We have teaching to do."
Hmmmm... I think we should start with some lessons of Dagon magic. Everyone knows that some of the lesser gods rest in the depths of the sea, and it's reason why it has so much magical potential. Get some sea water and fish to start with some basic lessons. And with basic lessons, I mean summoning horrors from the depths. I feel the basement II would be perfect for summoning some deep ones or other nightmarish fish abominations.
[3] You pry open the basement somebody sealed a living nightmare in to summon your own living nightmare, and are not surprisingly immediately overcome by horrifying dread. When you regain consciousness, the princess and nightmare are both gone, but fortunately the princess is easily relocated and your plans put back into motion.
Unfortunately the princess is... middling at calling forth the unseen powers. She keeps crying about the dark and the things moving in it, but she's talking about the shadows of the walls and not the bucket. The week isn't a complete loss, but it's a little frustrating.
Princess: Basement Phobia
Both: +1 Dagon MagicNji gently - but with great haste - trods towards the princess. "Welcome child. Do not scared, for you are in good and responsible hands. Now, first things first. As your first mentor I must impart to you a most vital skill for any princess, prince or member of the royal line. Now, observe." With a flourish of hands he points towards the ground and generates a mushroom with a large umbrella. In somber silence he tears it by the stem and presents it to the princess. "This shall be your weapon. The enemy is a group of bandits disguised as giant spiders in the basement. Squash them before they break and/or steal all our stuff, but be careful not to kill them. If they die, they can't pay taxes."
Maxime hastily interrupts Nji's monologue when he gets to the bit about giant spiders, and takes the mushroom away from her.
"This man is joking, my dear, the spiders are fine where they are, and besides that they are very small really. Apprentices do not clean out the basement on their first day, most especially not royal ones."
She then leaves Princess Marcille to the instruction of her fellow tutors, and picks up a tiny, unobtrusive parasite. She transforms the bug into something capable of understanding the princess's mental state when attached, and remotely transmitting the information to an onyx pendant for Maxime to read. The idea is that Maxime will be aware of when her charge is awake, asleep, terrified, in agony, or hypnotised by Unseelie bastards. Not intended to track location, as the growth of young minds requires some freedom and independence.
If there is any time left for Marcille which Maxime has charge of, she lets her wander around or stay in her room as she likes. Bug attached, naturally.
"...Also, someone should perhaps prevent Enoch from doing what he intends to."
[2] You snatch the mushroom out of the princess' hands, pat yourself on the back, and begin crawling around the floor looking for parasites while another mushroom is placed into her grasp.
Sadly, your results are, uh... well, the thing about mites is... anyway, you have an eightball mite that sort of answers questions sometimes, but you're not sure where it gets its information from. Needless to say, it does not attach elegantly to the princess, partially by virtue of being larger and heavier than her, and is unable to accurately sense and report her status.
Hoping to distract from the discussion on eldritch tutors, Archeux spoke up.
"Perhaps I can introduce myself now. The name is Archeux Venison, main contributor to the Arkanikon. Yes, THE Arkanikon. I've taught many a man, and even a rock, the principles of magic. I'm sure that my compatriots are more eager to teach you their magics than I am, but I'm sure that the persons of the Council were unwilling to teach you what a spell even is. The first part of your magical education here should be handled by none other than me.
Friends, I will make sure she knows the basics of magic required for her to understand half of what you do. I will avoid bias toward or away from any of the main branches of magic, and will go into some detail on the exotic branches some of you frequently use. So, will you all accept my request?"
Teach young Marcille some of the basics of magic. Mainly, what the basic and advanced schools are, and the nature of the exotic branches. Explain some simple magical jargon to her, if she's still willing to listen to my teachings for the time being.
"Ah yes, Marcille, I almost forgot. Our tower only has 8 beds, so someone among us will have to sleep elsewhere. I, personally, offer you a bed in my stead. I can simply sleep on one of the chairs on another floor; I had done so frequently while working on the Arkanikon, and I can do so again".
Let the princess sleep in a bed for her stay, and sleep in a chair at night.
[6] She gets a little in over her head, magic is large and sprawling after all, but seems to pick up the idea of magical theory well enough.
She doesn't seem to sleep in your bed very soundly though, despite the best efforts of the dreamlouse matriarchs infesting the bedroom level. Maybe she's used to fancier accommodations, beds made out of... peasants or something, you're not very fancy.
Both: +2 Magical Theory"Princess! I am Mordred! Hero of the People!" He flashes a dazzling smile, and raises his arms in a strong-man pose. "It is most fortunate for you to have been brought here to learn from us. Did you know that peasants are actually people? They are! I will teach you to recognize this, and to shun your evil, oppressive heritage!"
Speed the week trying to teach the princess revolutionary sentiment. Maybe taking her to a tavern to observe how miserable peasant people are under the rule of uncaring aristocrats.
[4] You take the young princess out to see
the plight of the common man. This succeeds in persuading her of the necessity of your noble cause. Well, a noble cause. Of some kind.
Princess: Noble Cause
+1 Public SpeakingDennis wanders in. A lump of bread is in his hand, which he eats in turns with the cucumber draped across his shoulders. After a moment, he focuses on the young ruler.
"So, you're Princess Marcille. Hello and greetings and all that. First things first, no titles. I'm gonna call you Marcy, and you can call me whatever you prefer. I'm probably named Dennis the Mage, but I've never seen any proof. Second, there's one truth in the world, and I'm gonna tell you now, before these other weirdos get in your head.
Dennis tears a final chunk off the bread, holding it in his mouth for a moment and tossing the remainder to his pet.
"Never, ever, EVER, let somebody tell you what's most important. Everybody back home, they called me mad for devotin' my time to these cucumbers. Well, I like sea cucumbers. I also like baking. Well, I'm happy, and they're gonna DIE FORGOTTEN. So, you do what you want with your life. If that's princessin', then do it. Not sure what that entails, probably ponies and dresses and dragons, right? If you want something else, say, art, or religion, or Necromancy, you do it, understand? You've got the money and the power. Crush anyone who says you've gotta be what THEY want."
Dennis takes off his hat, and draws the Lexicon Holothuroidea from within its depths before falling back into a chair. It rocks precariously back before falling back to normal.
"I'm gonna teach you what I know, if you allow it. If'n you enjoy sea cucumbers, or cooking, I'll teach you everythin' I know. Otherwise, it's up to you what you learn here. ONLY you."
Teach Marcy Sea Cucumber Magic.
[6] Marcy takes well to sea cucumbers. A little
too well. Maybe it's their fluid nature, their stoic silence, their elegant grace. Or maybe she's just figured out that it's way safer in the cucumber tanks than anywhere else in this tower. Regardless, she doesn't want to come out now, and keeps insisting she's a sea cucumber whenever somebody tries.
Princess: Cucumber Princess
Both: +2 Sea Cucumber MagicPrincess Marcille
Terrified
-
+0 Dabbling Vitamancer (0/2)
+0 Dabbling Magical Theory (0/2)
-1 Incompetent Dagon Priest (1/2)
-
Enthusiastic Vitamancy: One thing has gone right so far!
Noodle Armed: Poor Marcy is not very martially inclined, tending to quake and quail at calls to valorous combat.
Cruel: The princess is a little... bitter.
Basement Phobia: The princess doesn't like going down there.
Noble Cause: The princess believes that something must be done about the plight of the common man.
Cucumber Princess: Little Marcy insists she's a sea cucumber whenever somebody tries to drag her out of the sea cucumber tank to force her to learn eldritch magic.
Nallihen Talandr (Caellath)
Healthy
-
+3 Adept Polymorpher (0/16)
+2 Apprentice Vitamancer (28)
+1 Novice Resilient (0/4)
+1 Novice Charismatic (0/4)
-
The Great Crab: Worshiped by a nearby cult of terrified peasants who occasionally leave offerings to The Briny One. Attempts to explain that he is an evil and fearsome dragon rather than an arctic crab have failed.
Maxime Pfeiffer (NJW)
Healthy
-
+3 Adept Psychoarthropodist (0/16)
+2 Apprentice Subterfugist (0/8)
+2 Apprentice Gemcrafter (0/8)
-
Overlouse: Seems to have some kind of cultural or spiritual significance to the dream lice now infesting the tower, and who will occasionally leave her strange offerings or... maybe just garbage for her to take out? She's not really sure.
Nji (Secheral)
Healthy
-
+3 Adept Mycomancer (0/16)
+2 Apprentice Life Mage (0/8)
+2 Apprentice Dagon Priest (0/8)
-
Above the Law: Your reckless disregard for civility and law has earned you a fearsome reputation as a ruthless outlaw, not to be lightly crossed.
Enoch (randomgenericusername)
Healthy
-
+3 Adept Dagon Priest (1/16)
+2 Apprentice Archarus Priest (0/8)
+2 Apprentice Hag Magic (0/8)
-
Starsucker: Has a knack for sucking nightmarish abominations into the world. Does not have a knack for controlling nightmarish abominations.
Archeux "Archie" Venison (OceanSoul)
Healthy
-
+3 Adept Academic (0/16)
+2 Apprentice History Mage (0/8)
+1 Novice Enchanter (0/4)
+1 Novice Polymorpher (0/4)
-
Arkanikon: Has glimpsed the terrible truths of basic magic and recorded these unspeakable secrets into a blasphemous tome, available at most book shops and read widely by children. Has more familiarity with basic and intermagic principles, and haunted by swarms of living and ghostly children wanting autographs and deeper fell knowledge.
Cio Cioae (Tiruin)
Healthy
-
+3 Adept Air Mage (0/16)
+2 Apprentice Prophet (0/8)
+1 Novice Life Mage (0/4)
+1 Novice Illusionist (0/4)
-
Philosopher: Renowned as a guru and philosopher, granting improved understanding of foreign, sometimes downright alien and inexplicable, psychology and conditions.
Mordred (Nirur)
Healthy
-
+3 Adept Public Speaker (1/16)
+2 Apprentice Poll Mage (0/8)
+1 Novice Tactician (0/4)
+1 Novice Sacrificer (0/4)
-
Noble Hero: Celebrated as a noble hero, especially by the vile aristrocracy and hungry wraiths of the Untouchable Wastes.
Author
Topic: Wizard Princess RTD [Turn 15: Sideshow] (Read 46830 times)