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[Yoink]

CONSUME DUSTAN'S LIFE FORCE TO REPAIR MYSELF!
ALSO ADD SPIKES, BECAUSE WHY NOT  

[wertyzerty]

Make myself a wand from a nearby tree.

[Doomblade187]

TURN 5: CAVES

HAPPY PLACE HAPPY PLACE. TELEPORT TO MY HAPPY PLACE.

[6] HAPPY PLACE HAPPY PLACE HAPPY PL- YOU BLINK OUT OF THE GROUND AND APPEAR IN THE MIDDLE OF AN ENDLESS FIELD OF FLOWERS. AD ENDLESS. FIELD. OF FLOWERS. ENDLESS.

NO WAY OUT

pull out another probe to start teleporting in the pylons while i attack anyone that a threat and to close to the base

[1] YOU OUT OF PROBES! RUNNING LOW ON POWER OVERALL. YOUR FANCY WEAPONS NO WORK!

NO THREATS SPOTTED AS YOUR BASE EMERGES.

Psychically commune with cat, drive it mad, make it my fearsome eldritch cat mount

ride it around, breaking random folks' necks like it did to that shifty nurse

ooh, shiny wheelchair! Maul it, ignoring everything else unless attacked.

[4 VS 4] YOU BATTLE WILLS, BUT DUSTAN JUMP AWAY BEFORE MIND PROBE DRIVE HIM MAD. [4 VS 3] DUSTAN SMACK WHEELCHAIR CAUSING SCRATCHES IN FINISH. NOT THE PATENT LEATHER!

TEAM ELDRITCH EVIL

Attempt to cast raise dead.

Join Team Eldritch Evil, turn hairball into undead minion, order it to consume essence from hut wall.

[1,6] {RAISING THE DEAD} SYLVESTER AND QGGLN RAISE THEIR HANDS! SYLVESTER LOAN ESSENCE QGGLN TO CONVERT HAIRBALL INTO UNDEAD HAIRBALL OF DOOM, SEND AT TIKI BAR! [4 VS 2] {DRAINING TIKI BAR OF LIFE FORCE} THE UNDEAD HAIRBALL OF DOOM HOPS TO TIKI BAR AND

GROWS

TO BE FIVE FEET TALL. WITH FANGS.

YOU SEE, WHEN YOU CREATE EXPENSIVE HAIRBALL, YOU SPEND LOTS OF ENERGY AND HAVE BARELY ENOUGH TO CONTROL.

NOW YOU NO CAN CONTROL.

ALSO, THE TIKI BAR IS NOW WEAKENED BY THE DRAINING! BOARDS ARE NOW MORE FRAGILE.

Get businessman's briefcase, inspect for bones.

Make myself a wand from a nearby tree.

[1] {NIX} [1] {FIELD} NIX BARK AND RUN AFTER BRIEFCASE, BUT AS HE DO SO, FIELD WALK UP TO NEARBY TREE, WHO DID NOTHING TO ANYONE, AND TRY TO BREAK OFF BRANCH AND DRAIN LIFE ESSENCE TO MAKE WAND FOR PERSONAL USE.

TREE TAKES OFFENSE!

TREE SMACK FIELD IN FACE WITH BRANCH HE WAS TUGGING AT, LEAVING BLEEDING SCRATCHES! NIX JOG UP AND LEAP FOR BRIEFCASE, BUT MISS AND RUN INTO TREE TRUNK! TREE NOW ANGRY AND SWINGING!

BRIEFCASE FALL DOWN AND OPEN UP, [4] A FEW BONES FALL OUT.

Try and find a town or some thing away form this madness.

[4] YOU WANDER FURTHER AWAY. YOU SEE BIG SCI-FI BASE RISE OUT OF GROUND BEHIND YOU, BUT THAT SEEMS MAD AS WELL. SO YOU WANDER TO NEARBY COZY MEDIEVAL VILLAGE.

Scream and try to wheel myself away to safety.

[3] YOU SCREAM, BUT WHEN FRONT WALL TURN INTO TIKI BAR, IT BECAME WHEELCHAIR INACCESIBLE! YOU SETTLE FOR CORNER AWAY FROM GROWLING UNDEAD HAIRBALL.

CONSUME DUSTAN'S LIFE FORCE TO REPAIR MYSELF!
ALSO ADD SPIKES, BECAUSE WHY NOT

YOU STILL CLOSE ENOUGH TO DRAIN CAT, SO YOU REACH OUT WITH DEMON POWERS. [3 VS 5] HM. CAT SEEM RESISTANT TO YOU POWERS. MAYBE NEED TO BE STRONGER THAN MINOR DEMON POSSESSING GLOWING WHEELCHAIR. OR YOU COULD STOP GLOWING. TAKES LOTS OF ENERGY.

[1] YOU TRY TO ADD SPIKES, BUT BY MOVING ENERGY TO MAKE THE SPIKES, YOU DEFORMED THE WHEELS! YOU A NORMAL CHAIR NOW.

ARENA NEWS

THE PROTOSS BASE IS COMPLETE! NOW THE READY TO TAKE OVER!

Spoiler: AREA STATUS (click to show/hide)

GENERIC GREEN FIELD: GREEN
WOODEN HUT: DOOR BROKEN, BLOODIED, WEAKENED, SCORCHED, UNDERGROUND
PROTOSS BASE: COMPLETED
MEDIEVAL VILLAGE: INTACT

Spoiler: NPC STATUS (click to show/hide)

SENTIENT RAINBOW DIRT: GLOWING ORB
UNDEAD HAIRBALL OF DOOM: HIGHLY POWERED
TREE: HEALTHY, ANGRY

Spoiler: PLAYER STATUS (click to show/hide)

YOINK
NAME: GESHOR THE INSATIABLE
CLASS: MINOR DEMON
STATUS: HANDLE MISSING, NORMAL CHAIR
NRDL
NAME: NIX
CLASS: GIANT DOG
STATUS: HEALTHY
SECHERAL
NAME: FRIENDSHIP
CLASS: UNICORN
STATUS: SUFFOCATING! [1 TURN TILL DEATH]
ROSEHEART
NAME: HUT
CLASS: FRONT WALL OF HUT
STATUS: TIKI BAR, STUCK IN CAVE WALL, WEAKENED
WERTYZERTY
NAME: FIELD
CLASS: BUSINESSMAN
STATUS: HEALTHY, SCRATCHED
CROCANDBEARLOVER
NAME: KONSTANTIN VSELODOVICH KALASHNIKOV
CLASS: MARTIAL ARTIST/GUNATE (BASICALLY KARATE, BUT WITH GUNS)
STATUS: BLEEDING!
DARKWARLOCK3
NAME: VOLCANIS
CLASS: PROTOSS ZEALOT
STATUS: HEALTHY, OUT OF POWER
KING ZULTAN
NAME: MR. MONEY
CLASS: HOBO
STATUS: HEALTHY
SPRINKLED CHARIOT
NAME: SYLVESTER
CLASS: LICH
STATUS: LOW ON MAGIC
MAXIMUM SPIN
NAME: QGGLN
CLASS: ELDER GOD
STATUS: MISSING PART OF TENTACLE, LOW ON MAGIC
GIGAGIANT
NAME: DONNY HORMLESS
CLASS: HANDICAPPED
STATUS: HAS NO LEGS; IN A WHEELCHAIR

Spoiler: GM (click to show/hide)

LET THE ADVERSARIES EMERGE!

[GigaGiant]

Wish for a miracle that will save me and grant me the ability to walk.

[darkwarlock3]

recharge my tech continue to expand protoss base by have it produce more probes to gather res

[Secheral]

Open and connect portal to hut. Kindly ask endless flowers to spread through it.

[sprinkled chariot]

Drink coffee to recharge my magical powers,
Search for suitable vile minions, while laughing as cartoon villain.

[NRDL]

Tree is just big stick. Pull big stick out of ground, play fetch with someone.

[Maximum Spin]

Team Eldritch Evil:

Invite obvious wheelchair demon to join team Eldritch Evil, stop being a wheelchair, and start being my new replacement tentacle. If he accepts, draw on all the magic of all of Team Eldritch Evil to teleport the three of us to a pleasant medieval village where we will have a much easier time inflicting our evil upon the land.

[King Zultan]

Look around the village before it gets destroyed.

[Dustan Hache]

continue to violently maul the glowing chair till it stops glowing or I get attacked.

[Yoink]

((OH SHIT SORRY I FORGOT BOUT THIS))

Wish for a miracle that will save me and grant me the ability to walk.

TWIST AND COMPRESS MY METAL FORM INWARDS, CRUSHING THIS COWARD AFTER SENSING HIS TRAITOROUS THOUGHTS

THEN JUMP SHIP TO TEAM ELDRITCH EVIL I GUESS BECAUSE WHY NOT
BE A THICC AF TENTACLE WITH LIKE SUCKERY BITS AND ALL THAT SHIT            

[Doomblade187]

TURN 6: A PEACEFUL MEDIEVAL VILLAGE

Wish for a miracle that will save me and grant me the ability to walk.

[5] HURRAH, YOU CAN WALK NOW! YOU LEAP OUT OF CHAIR, DANCE JIG OF JOY.

Wish for a miracle that will save me and grant me the ability to walk.

TWIST AND COMPRESS MY METAL FORM INWARDS, CRUSHING THIS COWARD AFTER SENSING HIS TRAITOROUS THOUGHTS

THEN JUMP SHIP TO TEAM ELDRITCH EVIL I GUESS BECAUSE WHY NOT
BE A THICC AF TENTACLE WITH LIKE SUCKERY BITS AND ALL THAT SHIT

[2 VS 2] {CHAIR VS HUMAN} THE CHAIR LUNGE AFTER HUMAN WHO DANCING JIG OF JOY, BUT JIG TOO JIGGY!
YOU JOIN TEAM ELDRITCH EVIL AND [2] FAIL TO BECOME A TENTACLE. YOU STILL ON TEAM THOUGH.

recharge my tech continue to expand protoss base by have it produce more probes to gather res

[5] YOU RECHARGE TECH AND EXPAND PROTOSS BASE. THE PROBES LURCH ACROSS THE LAND IN ALL DIRECTIONS!

Open and connect portal to hut. Kindly ask endless flowers to spread through it.

[4] PORTAL AQUIRED! YOU WALK THROUGH PORTAL AND FIND YOURSELF UNDERGROUND. BEHIND HUT, AS FRONT EMBEDDED IN WALL. YOU WAVE A HOOF AT THE ENDLESS FLOWERS AND [5] THEY BEGIN TAKING OVER THE UNDERGROUND! FLOWERS EVERYWHERE.

Drink coffee to recharge my magical powers,
Search for suitable vile minions, while laughing as cartoon villain.

[5] YOU FIND MANY SUITABLE VILE MINIONS INDEED, ALL SORTS OF MOLES AND VOLES AND RATS AND FERRETS... WAIT. IS THIS REDWALL? YOU FIND ARMY OF VERMIN UNDERGROUND, ARMED TO THE TEETH.

[3] YOU TRY LAUGH LIKE CARTOON VILLAN, BUT ONLY MANAGE LAUGH LIKE AVERAGE JOE. DISSAPOINT.

Tree is just big stick. Pull big stick out of ground, play fetch with someone.

[5] BIG STICK AQUIRED. YOU DROP THRASHING TREE AT FOOT OF BUSINESSMAN, AND [5] HE THROW IT INTO DISTANCE LIKE JAVELIN. YOU RUN OFF AFTER!

Team Eldritch Evil:

Invite obvious wheelchair demon to join team Eldritch Evil, stop being a wheelchair, and start being my new replacement tentacle. If he accepts, draw on all the magic of all of Team Eldritch Evil to teleport the three of us to a pleasant medieval village where we will have a much easier time inflicting our evil upon the land.

HE ACCEPT! [2] OOPS, MAGIC DOWN. TIME TO CALL CUSTOMER SERVICE FOR YOUR MACIC ABILITY PROVIDER.

Look around the village before it gets destroyed.

[5] The village shines like a rustic gem in the setting sun as the peasants lay down their hoes and rakes and go inside to cook and sleep. The ring of the local smith's hammer rings out from the stable as the church chimes the tenth hour of the afternoon. It is truly a perfect vista, only made better by the Protoss probes walking towards the village in the distance.

continue to violently maul the glowing chair till it stops glowing or I get attacked.

[6 VS 2] YOU LEAP AT CHAIR, AND GESHOR HAS NO TIME TO MOVE OUT OF WAY! [5 VS 2] YOU BAT IT ACROSS THE HUT AND POUNCE ON IT, RENDERING IT INTO A FINELY COMPACTED PATTY OF METAL AND LEATHER. GESHOR FLOATS OUT, BATTERED AND DISORIENTED. HIS VESSEL IS GONE, HIS BEING WEAKENED!

ARENA NEWS

THE UNDEAD HAIRBALL OF DOOM LOOK AROUND SHACK FOR TARGETS. BPURRRRRR. [5] {TARGET IS DONNY} [3+1 VS 4] {POWERFUL HAIRBALL STRIKE!} DONNY DANCEDIVE OUT WAY OF INCOMING UNDEAD HAIRBALL OF DOOM. CLOSE ONE!

Spoiler: AREA STATUS (click to show/hide)

GENERIC GREEN FIELD: GREEN
WOODEN HUT: DOOR BROKEN, BLOODIED, WEAKENED, SCORCHED, UNDERGROUND
PROTOSS BASE: COMPLETED, EXPANDING
MEDIEVAL VILLAGE: INTACT

Spoiler: NPC STATUS (click to show/hide)

UNDEAD HAIRBALL OF DOOM: HIGHLY POWERED
TREE: RIPPED OUT OF GROUND AND THROWN SEVERAL HUNDRED FEET, ANGRY
PROTOSS PROBES: LOYAL
VERMIN HORDE; LOYAL
[/b]

Spoiler: PLAYER STATUS (click to show/hide)

YOINK
NAME: GESHOR THE INSATIABLE
CLASS: MINOR DEMON
STATUS: MISSING VESSEL
NRDL
NAME: NIX
CLASS: GIANT DOG
STATUS: HEALTHY
SECHERAL
NAME: FRIENDSHIP
CLASS: UNICORN
STATUS: HEALTHY
ROSEHEART
NAME: HUT
CLASS: FRONT WALL OF HUT
STATUS: TIKI BAR, STUCK IN CAVE WALL, WEAKENED
WERTYZERTY
NAME: FIELD
CLASS: BUSINESSMAN
STATUS: HEALTHY, SCRATCHED
CROCANDBEARLOVER
NAME: KONSTANTIN VSELODOVICH KALASHNIKOV
CLASS: MARTIAL ARTIST/GUNATE (BASICALLY KARATE, BUT WITH GUNS)
STATUS: BLEEDING!
DARKWARLOCK3
NAME: VOLCANIS
CLASS: PROTOSS ZEALOT
STATUS: HEALTHY
KING ZULTAN
NAME: MR. MONEY
CLASS: HOBO
STATUS: HEALTHY
SPRINKLED CHARIOT
NAME: SYLVESTER
CLASS: LICH
STATUS: UNDEAD
MAXIMUM SPIN
NAME: QGGLN
CLASS: ELDER GOD
STATUS: MISSING PART OF TENTACLE, MAGIC ABILITY PROVIDER DOWN
GIGAGIANT
NAME: DONNY HORMLESS
CLASS: FORMERLY HANDICAPPED
STATUS: HEALTHY

Spoiler: GM (click to show/hide)

IN WHICH SURPRISINGLY LITTLE HAPPENS.

[NRDL]

Pick up giant stick, gnaw on it.

[darkwarlock3]

start teleporting more zealots in by using base. while upgrade my self to high Templar