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Creatures Uncovered (Concerns the secrets of the beast warrior)

5 (6.4%)

Misconceptions About The Dragonlord (Concerns the secrets of dragons)

10 (12.8%)

Foundations of Blizzards (Concerns the secrets of wind and air as magical weapons)

6 (7.7%)

The Meaning of Dragonfire (Concerns the secrets of dragons)

5 (6.4%)

Book of Coagulation (Concerns the secrets of legendary cheese making)

42 (53.8%)

Look for more books, I want a different secret

1 (1.3%)

Let's just steal a slab and hope for the best

9 (11.5%)

Total Members Voted: 78

[MottledPetrel]

I find it pretty ironic that Derpy Dev was the original bad pun maker, and now that he hasn't said anything in the thread for a while we've had someone else step up to fill the void. I didn't expect puns would become such an integral part of the narrative.

Update hopefully some time this weekend. I'm sorry that its been slow guys, but after finals I should be able to crank out a lot more content.

[Lunardog15]

well i guess that i cant be called hell no more
cuz there's not eternal PUNishment 

[auzewasright]

Will make a journal update tomorrow.

[Aurum System]

Can I be Koopaded as an architect with the next migrant wave, if the losses are replaced with some leftover?

[Lunardog15]

If i die I wish to be reincarnated as a cat like creature or a cat

[MottledPetrel]

Can I be Koopaded as an architect with the next migrant wave, if the losses are replaced with some leftover?

I could just koopa you as one of the most recent migrants if you want, I kinda completely skipped over them because of the fight and I could just say that the demon koopa got your name wrong.

[auzewasright]

If i die I wish to be reincarnated as a cat like creature or a cat

IRL or in Modded Hell? /s

[scourge728]

I just realized, you know how I made a dolphin civ for the mod.... well, dolphin men are all all legless, so that's gonna be.... interesting

[MottledPetrel]

Better than the snakes with fire arms coming out of their eyes I'm sure it will be fine, we're living nowhere near their civ. Even if they do come, I'd imagine they'd just inchworm their way along. I can see it now, seemingly normal dolphins dressed up in diplomatic suits inchworming their way across a field of smoldering ash.

[scourge728]

Actually I'm pretty sure you would just end up with a bunch of dead dolphins with arms

[Aurum System]

Let me guess you forgot to make them able to breathe on land, scourge.

I'd be fine with being a skipped over Koopa from the last migrant wave.

[scourge728]

I... don't know actually

[MottledPetrel]

Actually I'm pretty sure you would just end up with a bunch of dead dolphins with arms

I might put this in the quotes section for out of context humor, but for now, it's raw analyzing time.

I'm only five seconds into the raws, and what do I find?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[ENTITY:DOLPHIN]
   [ALL_MAIN_POPS_CONTROLLABLE]
   [CREATURE:DOLPHIN_MAN_BOTTLE_SCOR]
   [TRANSLATION:HUMAN]

(Turns out that 'totally normal' human civ we were joking about at the beginning might actually be a pod of dolphin men)

So it turns out Bottlenosed Dolphin men are based almost completely off of Bottlenosed Dolphins, who do in fact have arms but no legs.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[CREATURE:DOLPHIN_MAN_BOTTLE_SCOR]
   [COPY_TAGS_FROM:DOLPHIN_BOTTLE_SCOR]
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:ANIMAL_PERSON_LEGLESS]
   [GO_TO_END]
   [SELECT_CASTE:MALE]
      [CASTE_NAME:bottlenose dolphin man:bottlenose dolphin men:bottlenose dolphin man]
   [SELECT_CASTE:FEMALE]
      [CASTE_NAME:bottlenose dolphin woman:bottlenose dolphin women:bottlenose dolphin woman]
   [SELECT_CASTE:ALL]
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:PUNCH_ATTACK]
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:TAIL_ATTACK]
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:TOOTH_BITE_ATTACK]
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:STANDARD_WALK_CRAWL_GAITS:900:750:600:439:1900:2900] 20 kph
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:STANDARD_CLIMBING_GAITS:2990:2257:1525:731:4300:6100] 12 kph
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:STANDARD_SWIMMING_GAITS:900:528:352:176:1900:2900] 50 kph
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:STANDARD_CRAWLING_GAITS:2990:2257:1525:731:4300:6100] 12 kph
   [GO_TO_START]
   [NAME:bottlenose dolphin man:bottlenose dolphin men:bottlenose dolphin man]
   [DESCRIPTION:An aquatic person in the shape of a bottlenose dolphin with arms.]
   [POPULATION_NUMBER:5:10]
   [CLUSTER_NUMBER:3:5]
   [MAXAGE:30:40]
   [CREATURE_TILE:'D']
   [COLOR:0:0:1]

Bottlenosed Dolphins are in fact immobile on land and are completely aquatic, which as far as I know means that they will suffocate on land.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[CREATURE:DOLPHIN_BOTTLE_SCOR]
   [DESCRIPTION:A medium sized ocean mammal. It is known to be playful.]
   [NAME:bottlenose dolphin:bottlenose dolphins:bottlenose dolphin]
   [CASTE_NAME:bottlenose dolphin:bottlenose dolphins:bottlenose dolphin]
   [CHILD:5][GENERAL_CHILD_NAME:bottlenose dolphin calf:bottlenose dolphin calves]
   [CREATURE_TILE:'D'][COLOR:0:0:1]
   [LARGE_ROAMING]
   [CREATURE_CLASS:AQUATIC]
   [CREATURE_CLASS:MAMMAL]
   [CREATURE_CLASS:DOLPHIN]
   [AQUATIC][UNDERSWIM][IMMOBILE_LAND]
   [BENIGN][NATURAL]
   [PETVALUE:750]
   [BIOME:ANY_OCEAN]
   [POPULATION_NUMBER:15:30]
   [CLUSTER_NUMBER:3:9]
   [PREFSTRING:calls]
   [PREFSTRING:intelligence]
[BODY:BASIC_2PARTBODY:BASIC_HEAD_NECK:SIDE_FLIPPERS:TAIL:2EYES:2LUNGS:HEART:GUTS:ORGANS:NECK:SPINE:BRAIN:SKULL:MOUTH:GENERIC_TEETH:RIBCAGE]
   [BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:STANDARD_MATERIALS]
      [REMOVE_MATERIAL:HAIR]
   [BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:STANDARD_TISSUES]
      [REMOVE_TISSUE:HAIR]
   [BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:VERTEBRATE_TISSUE_LAYERS:SKIN:FAT:MUSCLE:BONE:CARTILAGE]
   [SELECT_TISSUE_LAYER:HEART:BY_CATEGORY:HEART]
    [PLUS_TISSUE_LAYER:SKIN:BY_CATEGORY:THROAT]
      [TL_MAJOR_ARTERIES]
   [BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:STANDARD_HEAD_POSITIONS]
   [BODY_DETAIL_PLAN:HUMANOID_RIBCAGE_POSITIONS]
   [USE_MATERIAL_TEMPLATE:SINEW:SINEW_TEMPLATE]
   [TENDONS:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:SINEW:200]
   [LIGAMENTS:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:SINEW:200]
   [HAS_NERVES]
   [USE_MATERIAL_TEMPLATE:BLOOD:BLOOD_TEMPLATE]
   [BLOOD:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:BLOOD:LIQUID]
   [CREATURE_CLASS:GENERAL_POISON]
   [GETS_WOUND_INFECTIONS]
   [GETS_INFECTIONS_FROM_ROT]
   [USE_MATERIAL_TEMPLATE:PUS:PUS_TEMPLATE]
   [PUS:LOCAL_CREATURE_MAT:PUS:LIQUID]
   [BODY_SIZE:0:0:30000]
   [BODY_SIZE:4:0:90000]
   [BODY_SIZE:10:0:650000]
   [BODY_APPEARANCE_MODIFIER:LENGTH:90:95:98:100:102:105:110]
   [BODY_APPEARANCE_MODIFIER:HEIGHT:90:95:98:100:102:105:110]
   [BODY_APPEARANCE_MODIFIER:BROADNESS:90:95:98:100:102:105:110]
   [MAXAGE:40:50]
   [ATTACK:BITE:CHILD_BODYPART_GROUP:BY_CATEGORY:HEAD:BY_CATEGORY:TOOTH]
      [ATTACK_SKILL:BITE]
      [ATTACK_VERB:bite:bites]
      [ATTACK_CONTACT_PERC:100]
      [ATTACK_PENETRATION_PERC:100]
      [ATTACK_FLAG_EDGE]
      [ATTACK_PREPARE_AND_RECOVER:3:3]
      [ATTACK_PRIORITY:MAIN]
      [ATTACK_FLAG_CANLATCH]
   [ATTACK:SLAP:BODYPART:BY_CATEGORY:TAIL]
      [ATTACK_SKILL:STANCE_STRIKE]
      [ATTACK_VERB:slap:slaps]
      [ATTACK_CONTACT_PERC:100]
      [ATTACK_PREPARE_AND_RECOVER:4:4]
      [ATTACK_PRIORITY:MAIN]
      [ATTACK_FLAG_WITH]
      [ATTACK_FLAG_BAD_MULTIATTACK]
   [ALL_ACTIVE]
   [NO_DRINK]
   [HOMEOTHERM:10067]
   [APPLY_CREATURE_VARIATION:STANDARD_SWIMMING_GAITS:900:528:352:176:1900:2900] 50 kph
   [SWIMS_INNATE]
   [CANNOT_JUMP]
   [MUNDANE]
   [CASTE:FEMALE]
      [FEMALE]
   [CASTE:MALE]
      [MALE]
   [SELECT_CASTE:ALL]
      [SET_TL_GROUP:BY_CATEGORY:ALL:SKIN]
         [TL_COLOR_MODIFIER:GRAY:1]
            [TLCM_NOUN:skin:SINGULAR]
      [SET_TL_GROUP:BY_CATEGORY:EYE:EYE]
         [TL_COLOR_MODIFIER:BLACK:1]
            [TLCM_NOUN:eyes:PLURAL]

Maybe we should have thought this through a little bit more. Why did this even come up?

[stingpie]

just smack some horse legs on them, should be fiiiiiiiine.just don't question why Armok would put horse legs on dolphins...

[MottledPetrel]

The irony of this plan is that even with horse legs they would be immobile on land because of their tags...