Although I don't know what I expected either, other than the impression that its a girl's magazine.
((This legitimately made me burst out laughing. A girlie mag is
not meant for girls, it's basically a WWII name for Playboy-style mags. Softcore porn. PW's definition of porn is just...
girthier than that of regular people.))
At the request of Radio, I'm updating the pokemon game. Why does he want this? I'unno, but whatever, not like it's hard.
Huh. Well, hopefully I don't live in a false illusion world now!
Remember what I was doing and use my charmander to burn some nazis.
Ahh fuck everything is on fire over here too.
This is neither an action, nor correct! But it is freeform, so it gets a roll regardless.
[6]
Nevermind, you were quite correct. Everything
is on fire, because Charmander starts coughing and vomiting gouts of flame everywhere. None of it hits you, but things are getting
very hot now, and Charmander looks... well, as sick as a baby dinosaur that's vomiting literal fire. Pretty sick.
Zoroark's
still gone, too.
Distract Arbok from how juicy and delicious I look by making him help me with this:
-snipped quote about armor thickness testing-
Eager to do some proper science, and inspired by how shitty space marine power armor
apparently is, you pull paper and a couple pens out of nowhere. You offer one pen to Arbok, and then start scribbling.
[1]
You barely get through "7. Same test as 4, but this time the penetrator is made from a carved ponyta hoof. How many space marines are penetrated, and how many of them suffer a lethal wound?" before you realize Arbok isn't helping
at all. You look up from your work, and see it utterly failing to grasp a pen with its tail. After a few more seconds of rolling the pen around on the ground, Arbok frustratedly swipes the pen away with its tail, then hisses angrily at you. Venom drips from its fangs as it begins to coil in preparation for a bite.
Breath daemonic fire at him, then grab and stomp him into the ground.
[6]
Well then.
[217] (Ursaring)
[26] (Raichu)
You angrily roar at the glowing marine, and as the five images of him start to roll back together, you realize he's turned yellow and started to shrink. Undaunted by chaos' strange whims, you attempt to breath fire at the fuzzy space marine... and completely fail. You roar again, this time in ursine rage, and charge the now-tiny enemy. Picking his mouselike body up in one paw, you slam it back into the ground, and move to stomp on him. You pause upon realizing that your leg is now covered in brown fur, rather than the glorious armor and blood it had been mere minutes ago.
[3]
While you're distracted, the small yellow mouse thing that has replaced the terminator marine starts rolling away from you. It gestures at you with one small fuzzy paw, then starts inspecting itself in confusion.