Apparently having nothing better to do, I've decided to bring some sense into the whole TWO_HANDED and MINIMUM_SIZE thing for weapons. Going down the curious hole of square-cube law, I've found out a couple of interesting little facts about humanoid creatures of DF:
- Bronze colossus, being the largest humanoid monster, is only about 12 m (39') tall. That's about a five story building, if being generous. Not the Colossus of Rhodes I've been picturing, merely a third of that. It's still a ~140 ton bronze dude though.
- Giants, assuming they have a mostly human build and are not the squat and sturdy type, are about 9 m (29-30') tall. Roughly three and a half stories. Not like in the famous "The Giant and The Wall" strip, probably, but if one stood right by my apartment, I still wouldn't be able to look it into the eyes. Cyclops and ettins are a wee bit shorter, so their eyes could be about right.
- Ogres would be almost 8 m. Seems a lot closer to giants than I thought, at least, in giant terms. Blind cave ogres are slightly more voluminous, although, I pircture them to be shorter and broader instead.
- The largest animal person cabable of breathing on land is elephant man, standing at about 6 m (19-20'), if it is more human than elephant in build. Else, it's probably more squat. For a walking and talking fella it's still notoriously terrifying, you'd have to shout for it to hear you from up there. The largest, heaviest spear a human can wield is barely a pointy stick for an elephant man. Two-handed sword handles are easily one-handed to them.
- Sasquatch and yeti are barely 3 m (9') tall. Meanwhile, trolls and are ~1.5 times taller than humans, so, a little less than 9'. Resent portrayal of bigfoot in games is somewhere at this spot. Minotaurs are only slightly shorter than that.
- A giant rat standing up would still be looking down on an average human. Same could be said about any upstanding giant vermin.
- Kobolds are probably conventional halfling height, not smaller, as sometimes assumed. Gnomes are shorter, but the difference is very subtle, not like with garden gnomes. Fire imps are a head shorter and probably more lithe; for them, a dagger is as big as a longsword is for humans.
- Fairies, at the most generous assumption, are 18 cm, but probably shorter, accounting for wings. Pixies, on the other hand, are insect size.