Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

No it is really <comfy> here :^)

Sorry what was the question?

The galaxy is a hoax, nothing exists outside of planet earth.

Why don't scientists do something useful like fix the economy instead?

We don't need to go to vacuum in space, we have vacuums here.

[Loud Whispers]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

We're still on planet Earth

2280:02:25: Mankind's traditions of scientific discovery and economic prosperity left a gap that is waiting to be pursued in this golden age of decadent and opulent wealth: the pursuit of harmony. Guru Tandas on a live mindlink stream tells mankind a simple message every 7PM: "Let us be grateful to those who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls bloom." His teachings are universally praised as environmentally friendly.

2281:09:23: The lowest approval rating of the United Nations government stands at an all time record of 95% approval, 5% disapproval, with highs of 100% approval & 0% disapproval. No one admits to being the 5% at local bacchanals, as it would be impolite.

2282:09:16: Local astronomers realize the moon isn't actually tidally locked for some reason and ponder over how long it has been in this state of affair.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This revelation comes as planet Earth's laboratories begin researching better laboratories to begin researching the most intrepid and esoteric answers of the cosmos from the comfort of terra firma. Humanity seems to be reaching closer to uncovering the limits of material understanding, and is working towards achieving full comprehension, using crude knowledge to discover refined knowledge, ad infinitum.

Spoiler: 2285:12:30 (click to show/hide)

Today comet seen,
Shining and alone it gleams,
For a planet dream,
Human bean.

2288:03:09: Aarohi Varma is re-elected President of the United Nations.

Spoiler: 2290:01:03: (click to show/hide)

Earth sensors have over the centuries grown more and more advanced, and reached the level of technical progress where they covered the Iblyrian home-system. As a result the United Nations Observatory gained the ability to reliably track the ingoing and outgoing fleets of the Mandasurans, with some notable alarm occurring when Mandasuran Admiral Honeydew was spotted leading an attack squadron out of Iblyria. Curiously these warships did not head to Earth, instead following some other alien craft on an attack vector. The United Nations is put on a heightened state of alarm, but no resources are diverted away from further futurising Earth's scientific and recreational facilities.

Spoiler: 2291:07:12 (click to show/hide)

18 months after Admiral Honeydew left Iblyria, the 1st Corolla fleet is spotted returning to their home system to merge with a small reinforcing fleet of two corvettes and to dock at the spaceport for repairs. The 1st Corolla is suffering damage and considerably reduced in strength, though what caused such damage is unknown.

Spoiler: 2291:11:09 (click to show/hide)

A science vessel briefly warps into the Altair system, yet curiously panicks and jumps out of the system the moment it realizes it is being observed. What manner of creatures are this? A possible ally against the Mandasura?

[IronyOwl]

Just as our pursuit of ultimate harmony has freed ourselves, so too has it freed our moon.

[Xantalos]

This is amazing why have I not found it sooner

[Egan_BW]

Dunno how much my opinions matters, but I think it's justified to put unmanned lasers in orbit to burn down those dastardly Plantpeople missiles. Purely as point-defence, you understand. Aaaaand maybe later we could form a temporary fleet to go to Iblyria and "enforce our sanctions". With fire.

[NJW2000]

By no means! Space is an environmental haven, unsullied by humans, and that's how it's staying!

As for the suggestion of war... Completely barbaric!

[Egan_BW]

* Egan_BW founds a xenophobe faction.

These foul Xenos are hard at work sullying space already! Surely you won't allow these plants to take Utopia away from us?

[TheDarkStar]

No, you see, if we pollute space we become like the aliens. Besides, it would mean there's less money for developing new hypernet videos...

wait, what I was talking about? right, here's a cool video of a 5-d cat. and here are 500 more. who would want to go to space when there are cat videos to watch

[Egan_BW]

Not even GOING to space now, they're drones. Orbital laser drones.

[Teneb]

Not even GOING to space now, they're drones. Orbital laser drones.

If we put drones on orbit, they'll block the view of the night sky! That is obviously unacceptable! It'll be even worse if they fire!

[blueturtle1134]

You can probably cut a few good trade deals with all the tech and resources we're accumulating...

...though you do need to explore to get new ideas, right? That's how it works?

[Egan_BW]

If we put drones on orbit, they'll block the view of the night sky! That is obviously unacceptable! It'll be even worse if they fire!

you don't understand physics kill yourself kindly
it's a reference to something in this aar don't ban me plox

[Kanil]

Not even GOING to space now, they're drones. Orbital laser drones.

If we put drones on orbit, they'll block the view of the night sky! That is obviously unacceptable! It'll be even worse if they fire!

It's bad enough that our moon has become unstuck, now we have to look up and see drones? Eugh, no!

[AzyWng]

My brothers a huge fan, may as well PTW.

Please don't die. Not until this is done, at least.

[NJW2000]

Senator Liu of the UN Interpersonal Happiness Council politely suggests at a major conference that we shouldn't go into space until we've properly considered the possibility of inadvertantly causing its inhabitants emotional harm.

[Egan_BW]

I will point out that causing emotional harm is one of the aims of the economic sanctions we have already started using. I will further point out that the law does not prohibit causing grievous emotional and physical harm to the plantpeople using orbital firebombs, as they are neither citizens of earth nor technically "people".
Come on people, we are egalitarian, not pacifists.