Round 9: Still Breathing
Time: Afternoon
The sun rises to its highest point in the day, baking the earth in a warm glow.
Blitz walks over Croc, pointing her revolver directly at the downed Magical Girl. [7 VS. 3-2] Croc screams incomprehensibly out of rage and pain, although that is quickly silenced with two shots straight to the gut. The human rights advocate doubles over, clutching her fatally wounded stomach. It's unknown whether out of pity or cold-hearted determination, but Blitz puts Croc's misery to an end with a final shot through the skull. One less problem to deal with, although the whole 'leg nearly cut into two' thing is going to be a nuisance.
BlitzDungeoneer has defeated CrocAndBearLover! +1 Point
+Article: Ludwig Wittgenstein: +Ability: The Language GameDarkgamer bakes another batch of gingerbread cookies, using a liberal amount of the bakery's supplies with its owners currently cowering upstairs. Jyoti mediates silently and the bored Menshevik stares out the window. [Gingerbread Baking: 2+4] It's the same size as the last batch, although in his haste Dark made them of far inferior quality; about half with picture perfect gingerbread men, while the other half suffered losses: a missing leg here, a half cracked head there. Oh well. Dark fishes the Ganesh Idol back out and channels his energy into it once more until it is vibrating with glowing red eyes. [8] The gingerbread men rise from on their own accord and march towards Dark, half normal and half deformed. "Master...we live to serve..." They kneel, and rather pathetically a few of the poorly made men crumble and break during this ritual.
Dark goes further with his plans, what if he can use the Idol to grow his cookie army? Channel his energy into the Ganesh Idol once again, he now focuses on their size rather than number. [1] The gingerbreads begin to grow in girth, although instead of gaining height and mass they just look like they are expanding, getting puffier. Now they resemble pastries more than cookies.
[8] [9] Dark and the Menshevik have enough sense to run out the door just as the room begins to fill with hundreds of popping sounds like a 4th of July celebration gone haywire, and sweet. Once the explosions have passed, the two look through the shattered window to see the room is coated in burnt gingerbread residue, filled with an intangibly sweet and salty scent. Scattered baking materials and broken vases litter the ground, and the oven has a few notable holes so that, as the kids say nowadays, "Bakin' Machine Broke." Jyoti is still floating, untouched and undisturbed. "Perhaps the Idol is too powerful for you hands?" He asks Dark with a swarmy grin.
Fallacy explains his wishes to Jaameen, "Well, you see... pinecones aren't seeds. Pinecones contain seeds. Each pinecone contains many seeds, speeding up my collection of seeds greatly. As for why I wanted seeds... you see, I have a bit of magic myself. Dendromancy. I can grow a seed into a full tree instantly once every [three turns]. So that leads me to my request from you: can you teach me to use my magic more effectively, or if not, can you give me some magical tree seeds?"
The wizard sits back in his chair, pondering this request. "Despite living in a tree, my area of expertise is in the elements, not natural magic. For that, you would need a druid, I know one that lives not too far from here. If you want, I could train you in some apprentice level magical spells. Or I could point you towards that druid, your choice. For either, you must do some work for me." He scans the room, as if someone could be eavesdropping, and leans in towards Fallacy. "Many years ago I lived in Frumaed until the mayor confiscated my home. Knowing that bastard, he keeps the deed to my home locked up somewhere in his manor. If you can retrieve this deed for me, I will help you."
Dolosus cruises in his sports car down the marketplace, subwoofers blaring rap music that makes the interior of the car shake. The remaining townsfolk in the area back away, hushing their children behind their backs and glaring at the intruder, unknowingly replicating suburban people from another world. Dolosus sneers back, realizing that these stereotyping motherfuckers exist in every universe and every timeline. Just because he's listening to loud rap music in a pimped-out car, they think he's up to dirty business, ain't that some shit? He turns his attention back to his original goal, finding some abandoned stores to loot. [9] Looks like the butchershop has been recently abandoned. The building is a
little on fire, but at least it's pre-cooking the mutton already.
KJ runs up to Croc, bayonet ready, but the magical girl is already done for. It's a victory, but it's left him with an injured hand, and Blitz has a life-threatning injury.
An enraged NAV runs over to the spot where Croc once stood, [Stamina: 2] and reaches there a couple minutes too late. "You...asshole....I...shop..." NAV doubles over, wheezing. He might be regretting all those times he ignored his coach telling him to build up his stamina, because who need stamina when you play baseball?
Greatness and Paxie spawn right outside of the marketplace.
Jyoti
Status: Normal
Assets: Decorated Glaive
Jaameen
Status: Normal
Assets: Wizard's Garb
Name: Blitz Dungeoneer
Gender: Female
Nationality: English
Robert Allen: +1 Trade, +1 Law, +Colonel's Revolver, +Politician's Suit
Bernard's Watch: +Bernard's Watch [Stops Time, giving user an additional Action. CD:3]
Come Hither Child: +3 Poetry
Fidelia Bridges: +3 Nature Watercolor
Community Justice Act 2016: +5 Community Vigilantes
Ludwig Wittgenstein: +Ability: The Language Game
Status: Upper Left Ribcage Graze, Left Hip/Upper Leg Shredded [-3 Agility, Bleed-Out: 2]
Points: 1
Assets: Colonel's Revolver [0/6] [QR], Politician's Suit, Bernard's Watch [Stops Time, giving user an additional Action. CD:3 (1)]
Allies:
Abilities:
The Language Game - Can pick up on any language, including coded, dead and fictional languages, as he long as Blitz hears a single conversation in that tongue. Can teach anyone any language instantly.
Name: Ocean Soul
Gender: Male
Nationality: American
USS LST-1022: +
UST LST-1022 Tank-Landing Ship
Eugene Wilton Frémaux: +2 Trade, +2 Tanning, +Business Suit
Phoenix Skywalker: +Phoenix Skywalker Motorized Paraglider
Early Life and Career of Abraham Lincoln: +1 Sailing, +1 Exploration, +1 Rifles, +2 Law, +Hatchet
ING Bank Śląski: +1(+2) Trade, +$500
Status: Normal
Points: 0
Assets:
UST LST-1022 $500, Tank-Landing Ship, Business Suit, Phoenix Skywalker Motorized Paraglider, Hatchet
Name: KJ 1225
Gender: Male
Nationality: American
Odessa Opera and Ballet Theater +2 Opera & Ballet
Battle of the Plains of Abraham: +1 Muskets, +Bayoneted Musket, +Marching Infantry Uniform
Rieger Tuning: +2 Mechanics, +Modified Sports Car
Solomon Butcher: +2 Photography, +19th-Century Camera, +Picture:
Sod House on the HomesteadMV Victoria: +
MV Victoria Ferry
Demolición: +2 Demolition, +1 C4 Explosive,
+Sledgehammer
Status: Right Finger Severed [Bleeding], Right Hand Shrapneled [-1 Two Handed, Bleeding]
Points: 1
Assets: Marching Infantry Uniform, Modified Sports Car,
MV Victoria Ferry, Bayoneted Musket [0/1] [MR], C4 Explosive, Sledgehammer
Name: NAV
Gender: Male
Nationality: Chinese/American
Vegetarian Times: +2 Vegetarian Cooking, +Ability: Vegan Metabolism
Yang Ling: +2 Rifles, +M1 Garand Rifle
Milton, New Zealand: +2 Mining, +2 Pottery, +Artisan Clay Pot
42: +4 Baseball, +2 Clubs, +2 Throwing, +Baseball Uniform, +Baseball Helmet, +Baseball Bat
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermann_Julius_Gr%C3%BCneberg: +2 Chemistry, +1 Trade, +1 Bundle of TNT
Kero Kero Chime: +Ability: Frog Transformation
Status: Normal
Points: 0
Assets: M1 Garand Rifle [6/8] [MR], Artisan Clay Pot [3 Cabbages], Baseball Uniform, Baseball Helmet, Baseball Bat, 1 Bundle of TNT, Sterling SMG [24/34] [MR], Electric Guitar, M249 LMG [57/100] [LR], Cavalry Sabre, Beholla Pistol [7/7]
Abilities:
Vegetarian Metabolism: NAV can cure wounds by eating Vegetarian meals, but becomes sick if they eat non-Vegetarian food. Also, they never stop talking about Vegetarianism. Ever.
Frog Transformation: NAV turns into a humanoid frog whenever he is doused in water. While in this form, NAV gets +3 Jump and a long tongue that gives +2 Strength when it used. As soon as he is dry NAV reverts to human form.
Name: Dark Gamer
Gender: Male
Nationality: Viking / Russian
Gotland: +1 Axes, +Viking Battle Axe, ,+Viking Helmet, +Bag of Silver Coins
Unnidathil Ennai Koduthen: +2 Singing, +Artifact: Stolen Ganesh Idol
Tazza: The High Rollers: +2 Gambling, +Fancy Suit, +Leather Dress Shoes
Ormskirk: +4 Gingerbread Baking, +1 Trade
Left-wing Uprisings Agains the Bolsheviks: +2 Sabotage, +Prilutsky M1914 Pistol, +Ally: Embittered Menshevik
Status: Normal
Points: 0
Assets: Viking Battle Axe, Viking Helmet, Bag of Silver Coins, Fancy Suit, Leather Dress Shoes
Artifacts:
Ganesh Idol - It is said that this religious idol grants whoever hold it long lasting fortune. Dark Gamer won the ownership of the Idol in a game of chance.
Allies:
Embittered Menshevik [WWI Rifle [5/5] [MR], Dagger, Permanent Loathing of Bolsheviks]
Name: Dolosus Doleus
Gender:
Nationality:
Act a Fool: +Pimped-Out Sport Car, +Double-Barreled Shotgun, +Gold Chain
Aliens Gone Wild: +Futuristic Space Armor w/Laser Cannon
Sky Raiders: +2 Flying, +Biplane, +Ability: Daredevil with the Drink
Juan Falú: +2 Argentinian Classical Guitar, +1 Psychology, +Guitar
Welch Regiment: +1 Rifles, +Lee Enfield Rifle, 3 No. 73 Anti-Tank Grenades
Status: Normal
Points: 0
Assets: Pimped-Out Sport Car, Double-Barreled Shotgun [2/2] [MR], Futuristic Space Armor w/Laser Cannon [30/30] [LR], Biplane, Guitar, Lee Enfield Rifle [10/10] [MR], 3 No. 73 Anti-Tank Grenades
Abilities:
Daredevil with the Drink - Dolosus gets a +2 to any actions that intentionally put him in a dangerous situation. However, he must drink every 5 turns or incur a -2 General penalty. (3)
Name: Greatness942
Gender: Female
Nationality: Korean/Irish
C.L.I.F. - ASP Leow Xin Yi: +2 Stamina, +Flashlight, +Expandable Baton, +Handcuffs, +First Aid Kit
Bill Peyto: +2 Mountain Exploration, +Hiking Outfit, Lee-Enfield Rifle
Ballad of Seodong: +2 Mechanics, +2 Singing, +Ability: Legend of Seodong-yo
Finn Bálor: +2 Wrestling, +Finishing Move: Coup de Grace
Joseph Gilbert Totten: +2 Engineering (+4 Siege Engineering), +Tomahawk
Status: Normal
Points: 0
Assets: Flashlight, Expandable Baton, Handcuffs, First Aid Kit, Lee-Enfield Rifle [10/10] [MR], Tomahawk
Abilities:
Legend of Seodong-yo - Greatness can cause one princess that he meets in person to fall in love with him. Beware, this does not guarantee her family's approval, and will also cause someone to become Greatness's bitter arch-rival!
Finishing Move "Coup de Grace" - Greatness's signature finisher is a diving double-stomp launched from a great height. This technique has a higher chance to incapacitate a stunned target if it is successful.
Name: Paxiecrunchle
Gender: Male
Nationality: Swiss/American
Manassčs II de Pougy: +2 Catholic Prosselytizing, +$10,000 (Can only be used for donations to the poor or churches)
Hans Ormund Bringolf: +2 Wilderness Survival, +2 Blades, +1 Rifles, +2 Forgery, +2 Diplomacy, +Swiss Officer's Uniform, +WWI Rifle, +Machete, +Ability: Chased Through the World
Munaf v. Geren: +Ability: Habeaus Corpus Anytime, Anywhere
Humans: +Robotic Synth Companion
Chess Centres: +2 Chess, +2 Chess Socialization, +Chessboard
Status: Normal
Points: 0
Assets: $10,000 (Can only be used for donations to the poor or churches), Swiss Officer's Uniform, WWI Rifle [5/5] [MR], Machete, Chessboard
Abilities:
Chased Through the World - A lifetime of reckless abandon has left Paxiecrunchle with many useful skills, but also he is constantly pursued by a contingent of Swiss police trying to bring him to justice.
Habeaus Corpus Anyimte, Anywhere - Whenever and wherever Paxiecrunchle is arrested, he is treated as an American citizen, and thus will be given all the privileges that comes with it, including right to habeas corpus, right to an attorney, and protection given by the U.S. Government
Allies:
Robotic Synth Companion
I said the turn was underway, didn't I?
Author
Topic: Wiki-Wars: Once More With Feeling [Round 9: Still Breathing] (Read 10488 times)