"What makes the Skin Cutter Nymphs unique among the bedroom killers is that they truly love their victims.
They only kill because they truly believe their lovers are better off as upholstery than as troubled mortals.
I suppose that if the rumors are true, and that their crafts remain self aware, their outlook is not altogether wrong;
Sign me up for an eternity as some ageless, promiscuous, and omnisexual beauty's undergarments or bedding."
-'Killer of the Season: Subterranean Flesh Strippers', Gentleman's Quarterly, Issue 8 - 3Smith Lord Aurora Wordfire, Refuge Queen of Silent Hammers, Empress Consort of the Southernfrost, and Queen Consort of Bedlamb and the Marble CitySkills and Abilities:
-Although my social skills are rusty from isolation, I am highly respected as one of the few remaining first diggers.
-I am the greatest mortal metal-smith and furnace worker, without question. My skills in this area even surpass those of some gods.
-I have also mastered many other crafting skills, unrelated to the furnace.
-So long as my history is recorded in the language of the diggers, my soul and mind cannot truly be snuffed out (Granted by the World Weld)
-I can create mighty artifacts by inscribing the items I create with the great deeds of myself or the item's intended recipient (Granted by the World Weld)
-I am aware of the general location and activities of those who wield my artifacts, and I may exert light influence over their behavior (Granted by the World Weld)
-I can detect the great deeds of others nearby (Granted by the World Weld)
Artifacts and Minions:
The World Weld - Links my soul, the digger language, and the laws of reality itself. Allows me to easily create lesser artifacts.
The Face of Fate - Makes the wearer a mighty fighter and assassin. Wielded by Mril-Minda, who is presently teaching her child how to safely mix and apply poison to a blade.
Known Mortal Family:
(Husband - Present) All-Lord Ukareem the Silver, Emperor of the Southernfrost
(Husband - Absent) Scholar-King Emscythe, Monarch of the Marble City and Secretary General of the Greatwalls Alliance
(Husband - Absent) Bloodlord Haigen the Usurper, King of Bedlamb
(Mother-in-Law - Present) Trumil, the Slime Mold Hag
(Infant Son) Prince Dremscythe, Heir to Silent Hammers and the Marble City
Holdings:
Silent Hammers: A small city that provides 1 Wealth and 1 Food per month. Houses and defends up to 50 FU to military might. (23/50)
Dung Slopes Fungal Farm: A particularly farm where up to 6 LU can work per month. Typically yields 1 Food per LU of labor.
Axeltax at Tunnel's Mouth: A watchtower that Houses and defends up to 6 FU of military might. Yields 2 Wealth/month in collected taxes while at least 3 FU are stationed here. (3/6, Human Phalanx)
Available Military Population:
15-5 Force Units of Human Phalanx (x1.2 Bonus to open field battle. Available for 107 more months, or until the Kingdom of Narm enters a state of civil war)
5 Force Units of Dwarf/Drugar Militia (x1.3 Bonus to defending cities or fighting underground)
5 Force Units of Goblin Warslaves (x.75 Penalty to fighting in bright sunlight, does not need food to act)
3-3 Force Units of Charcoal Tribe Elf Rangers (x2 Bonus to fighting in the woods)
2 Force Units of Drugar Siege Operators (x4 Bonus to attacking cities, x1.5 Bonus to fighting megabeasts, x.25 Penalty in all other combat situations)
1 Force Unit of Weremule Warmonks (x3 Bonus to guarding VIPs, x.1 Penalty against Nickle Silver weapons, does not need food to act)
Civilian Population:
12 Labor Units of Assorted and Mixed Breed Diggers (2 LU to 5 FU Conversion Rate before material mod)
8 Labor Units of Halfling Commoners (2 LU to 4 FU Conversion Rate before material mod)
5 Labor Units of Goblin Slaves (2 LU to 4 FU Conversion Rate before material mod, does not need food to act)
4 Labor Units of Highborn Dwarves (1 LU to 4 FU Conversion Rate before material mod)
4 Labor Units of Highborn Drugar (1 LU to 4 FU Conversion Rate before material mod)
3 Labor Units of Educated Drugar Acolytes (1 LU to 4 FU Conversion Rate before material mod)
2 Labor Units of Human Commoners (2 LU to 7 FU Conversion Rate before material mod)
1 Labor Unit of Hobgoblin Drivers (2 LU to 7 FU Conversion Rate before material mod, does not need food to act)
Basic Resources:
x17 Food (+1 Per Month) - Your people can and do feed themselves, but food from the royal grainy must be provided for people to put aside their own livelyhood and peruse your interests. Spending 1 food allows you to issue an order commanding up to 5 FU or LU. Converting LU to FU will also usually cost additional food. You can deploy trade convoys to try and convert other resources into food.
x15 Wealth (+1 Per Month) - A representation of the various coins and paper currency in your treasury. Used to buy other resources and favors, and is generally the most effective resource to use as a trade good.
Advanced Resources:
x12 Wood (The most basic construction resource. Artifacts made from wood tend to harness the power of nature)
x1 Singing Wood (Construction resource sometimes used for advanced elfish builds. Artifacts made from singing wood tend to enhance the bearer's social skills)
x6 Stone (A more sturdy and less flammable construction resource. Artifacts made from stone tend to harness the power of earth)
x18 (+3 Per month for 107 months) Marble (A more valuable form of stone that can be combined with iron to make steel at a smelter. Artifacts made from Marble tend to harness the power of light)
x25 Brick (A common construction resource. Brick is already a finished good, and cannot be used as a component for most artifacts)
x9 Bronze (A military resource with a .80 Material Mod. Artifacts made from bronze tend to harness the power of fire)
x4 Steel (A military resource with a 1.5 Material Mod. Artifacts made from steel tend to have protective effects)
x4 Bloodstone (A magical military resource with no material mod. Both common gear and artifacts made from Bloodstone are particularly deadly towards all the digger races)
x1 Night Mithiril (A magical military resource with a 1.7 material mod. Artifacts made from Night Mithiril tend to aid in criminal activity)
x2 Deep Sapphire (A magical Military resource with a material mod of .5. Gear and artifacts made from Sapphire are great at drawing out the sorcerous power within one's blood)
x6 Sulfur (A magical resource used in the worship of wicked gods and construction of advanced siege weapons. Artifacts of sulfur are favored by wicked gods)
x1 Ensouled Leather of the Sailor (A magical resource gifted to you by the skin cutter nymphs to help tame predator lake. Unknown effect if used outside its intended artifact purpose)
x1 Ensouled Leather of the Princess (A magical resource gifted to you by the skin cutter nymphs to help tame an unruly child. Unknown effect if used outside its intended artifact purpose)
x1 Ensouled Leather of the Champion (A magical resource gifted to you by the skin cutter nymphs as a means to defend yourself. Unknown effect if used outside its intended artifact purpose)
Known Allies and Enemies:
Bardhill County (Ally, Trade Partner) - The fertile and clay rich human territory that completely encompasses your land. The ruler, Count Chance, deeply respects the craftsdwarfshipp and military skill of the diggers. In exchange for resources and a loan of troops, you have agreed to aid him in an anticipated civil war against his fellow counts when the king dies.
Southernfrost Empire (Ally) - The southernmost and mightiest of the northern dwarven civilizations. Southernfrost is rich in bronze and labor. The empire is ruled by your husband All-Lord Ukareem the Silver.
The Greatwalls Alliance (Ally, Trade Partner) - A loose confederacy of prosperous drugar city-states that pays tribute to your husband, Scholar-King Emscythe. Rich in copper, sulfur, and flux stone.
The Kingdom of Bedlamb (Ally) - Nation of drugar ruled by your husband Bloodlord Haigen the Usurper. Rich in iron, flux stone, and gems. Currently defending against invasion from an unknown drugar kingdom, and raids from an unknown dwarf kingdom.
The Beetle Queendoms (Enemy to All Diggers) - A drowish nation that sits between Silent Hammers and The Greatwalls Alliance. Traders can navigate around it, and they are currently too busy dealing with surface elf raiders to pose a threat.
The Pinewoods Tribes (Hostile) Small yet fierce surface elf civilizations that separate Silent Hammers from the Southernfrost Empire and the Kingdom of Bedlamb. They find the very ideas of commerce and industry to be deeply offensive, and slaughter trade convoys on site as a rule.
you declare after some thought. You are not sure what you wish to make quite yet, but are fairly certian it will be an artifact to boost some digger lord's social skills, using either you husband's or the tall opal elf's social feat as fodder.
"Very well," Princess Truffle declares,
"then we shall go and draw up the contract."---
You have Ukareem negotiate the exact contract for you, and you find the terms to be profitable, if not a bit harsh should you fail to deliver. The Opal Elves will front you one unit of singing wood, which you will include in an artifact to be delivered to them within the next six months. In exchange, the Opal Elves will turn over the rest of the resources confiscated from the Pinewoods elves to you, and pay you 15% of the sale price if they manage to find a buyer for the artifact within the next five years. Should you fail to provide the artifact on time, you forfeit your right to a 15% cut and must pay the opal elves 3 Wealth or 5 Magical Resources for each month the artifact is late should you wish to recieve the stockpile. You manage to include in the contract that Nazier Wildshroom (the tall one with the firearm) must be the one to accept delivery, freeing you up to use one of his feats if you so choose.
Both Princess and Smith Lord sign the document, which is wittnesed by the halfling Donna Sherry. All parties involved receive a copy. Hands are shaken, singing wood is loaded onto the hobbit's wagons, and your party departs the narrow canyon.
---
As you travel, you spend more time talking with Ukareem. You explain that he may wish to leave your side once you return home. The prophecy of embers revealed that your first child is fated to chase down and somehow try to obtain the artifact you were making while he was conceived, developed, and birthed.
"Perhaps your heir should wait until I have time to make an artifact that I can give to you or him as a gift. That way he dosn't do anything stupid to try and get it when he grows up."Ukareem laughs, showing the traditional dwarven bravado that he does his best to suppress when those not of his race are around.
"Please! Send it far! If he isn't able to pry an heirloom from some damn drugar, he isn't worthy to rule the empire his father and grandfather built!"---
Your last planned stop is to visit with a small pod of skin cutter nymphs, a race you have studied in depth due to their frequent production of artifacts. They are an ancient fey race, far older than you and the other first diggers, and are said to have invented tanning and leather-work. They are said to produce their crafts by skinning their mortal lovers alive and compelling their souls to remain in their flesh as it is tanned and cut. Most fey creatures and races that appear to by hybrids of beasts and humanoid females are of their creation, and they themselves are said to be great cavern monsters stuffed inside of woman shaped artifact leather outfits.
The pod actually dwells very close to Silent Hammers, living just beneath the far shore of predator lake, which borders your city-walls. As you aproach a seemingly long and narrow stretch of tunnel near your destination, Donna Sherry speaks up.
"Tunnel is Fay Maze. Once in, we at their mercy. Usually long tunnel passes and we meet pod in less than minute. Is cool, no?"---
Three hours later, you find yourself lost, alone, and fusterated. Despite following directly behind the Donna's men, and being shadowed by your own troops, you somehow managed to lose everybody. Just as you are about to give up hope, you spot a strange figure before you.
He is human, male, and completely naked. His skin is tattoo'd into labled sections, like one of those diagrams depicting which cuts of meat are extracted from which parts of a livestock animal's body. The labels are written in a fancy form of fey script which you can't quite understand, but you are pretty sure most of his torso is labeled 'bedroll' and his forehead 'daughter'.
The man bows before you, and speaks in perfect diggertounge.
"My mistresses extend their apologies Smith Lord. As your craft-work is vastly superior to their own, they do not feel worthy of being in your presence. As such, they had to isolate you so that they might buy drugs from the hobbit and trade stories with your husband."He gestures over his shoulder, and another figure emerges from the shadows: a female drow, just as naked and marked up as the human. She carries a large basket, which she leaves at your feet before vanishing as quickly as she appeared.
"As tributes to the mighty Smith Lord, my mistresses offer three gifts and three instructions." The speaker explains as you go through the basket, which contains nothing more than three large chunks of thin leather.
"The first gift is the flesh and soul of a brave elf sailor, who won the hearts of my mistresses by braving the storm they conjuored to punish his people. The first instruction is to take this sailor and work him with your deft hands and other treasures to make an artifact garment, the size and shape of a female hill giant. Then you, or the person whose deed is inscribed upon the garment, must travel to predator lake, capture a live dire orca, and force the beast into the artifact. Do this and the beasts of predator lake will yield to your whims."He frowns, noting the shock on your face.
"My mistresses apologize for not seducing you, if that is what troubles your heart. Your craftskill is too great, and your fate to heavy, for them to grant you peace and eternity by their knives.""No... no... Its not that. Go on with the gifts.""As you wish, Smith Lord," the human continues,
"The second gift is the flesh and soul of a human princess so chaste and virtuous that she submitted to the knives of my mistresses without even partaking in their pleasure beds first. The second instruction is to take this princess and work her with your deft hands and other treasures to make an artifact garment, the size and shape of a female digger. This artifact is to inscribed with the great deed of one of your own children, who walks a wicked path or faces a grim destiny. Make the wayward offspring wear the artifact, and they will be struck down, and at once reincarnated as a fey being, purged of all ill fate and intent. Your reborn daughter will be kin to both yourself and my mistresses, which will allow them to make her their queen and become your vassals.""If the thought of visiting a fey people and leaving unpleased breaks your heart, myself or any of the other knife-ready would gladly show you around the bedrooms and pleasure chambers," He adds, continuing to misinterpret your reaction to his claims.
"Diggers don't seek pleasure outside of marriage, boy," you snap,
"Now what is the third gift?""As it pleases you... The third gift is the flesh and soul of a dwarf champion so loyal that she demanded my mistresses spare her liege and seduce her for the knife instead. The third instruction is to take this champion and work her with your deft hands and other treasures to make an artifact garment, suited to protect one of your own loyal underlings from harm. Inscribe this artifact not with a mighty deed, but with a statement of your own will to survive. You shall never have to question the loyalty of the first champion who wears this artifact, and unless you take excessive risks with their life, they will stand at your side at the dire moment your are preparing for.""...Are you sure you don't need some private attention?" He asks, still misinterpreting the look of awe on your face,
"If people are not your thing, my mistresses do keep a handful of particularly well endowed unicorns.""Yeah..." You sigh,
"I'll be leaving now." You pick up the basket, turn away, and find yourself at once surrounded by your husband, troops, and halfling friend.
---
You arrive back home a little more than 24 hours later. You spot a strange wagon parked outside the building where you live and hold court, and a strange black and yellow hornet person standing next to it.
"Oh Smith Lord!" he calls,
"Over here!"For some reason, your guards completely ignore this, causing the speaker to laugh.
"Invisibility magic. You are the only one who can see me or my things right now. I was told by a particularly delishous messenger that you were looking to see me? How could I pass that honor up? As an artifact collector, I am a huuuuuuuuuuge fan of yours darling."The creature, who you now assume must be the Eastvile drone, produces a Bronze scepter encrusted with diamonds, bloodstone, and dire mamouth hoof.
"You recognize this, right? See, hugeeeeeee fan!"You recognize the scepter of course. You spent nearly a quarter century making it back before the World Weld sped up your artifact production. Digger's Lament was crafted for Yurzi the Lord of Pyromancy. It was an apology of sorts for... failing to let him down gently... when he proposed marriage to you at the massive 1500th birthday party the first diggers threw for themselves at the oven of origin. The various colored diamonds provide a slight enhancement to almost any magical school one could think of, but it is the other components that worry you now. The Bronze enhances fire magic greatly, the bloodstone make it particularly lethal to diggers, and the hoof allows any spell cast with the device to strike with the phyiscal force of a charging mega beast...
Assuming his skill in Pyromancy is even decent, the Eastvile Drone could easily decimate both your city and its population by combining the scepter's power with his illusion magic to avoid counter attacks.
"I was soooooooooo glad when I found out you were my new neighbor," he exclaims with a devilish grin as he saunters up to you, wraps his three right arms around you in a 'friendly' manner, and casually rests the business end of his artifact scepter several inches from your face.
"We are going to have so much fun together, darling!""Let me guess," you reply, trying and failing to maintain stoic composure,
"you want me to fix an artifact trident from before the dawn of time?""Wow!" He exclaims, applauding with two of his right hands,
"You are already reading my mind! We must have been made to be best friends!"The Eastvile Drone escorts you to his wagon, to show you the goods. The Trident is massive, fit for somebody 30-40 feet tall, and severed into three pieces. It is decorated with lead, platinum, and a strange icy-blue substance suspect is Bitfrost, the ice of the anti-gods that covered the earth before creation. The weapon itself is made of a metal that is yellow-gold in color and (rather shockingly) completely unknown to you.
Considering the problem of repairing it, you have two options. The first, and more mundane solution, would be spend some time studying the material before drafting a plan to fix it. Assuming the material can be worked by heat and hammer, you would likely need a foundry and a few LU of workers to actually carry out such a large repair job in a reasonable time frame. Perhaps you could use this opportunity to extort construction materials and labor out of your new 'friend'.
The other option would be to reforge the artifact as your own. Between the might of the world weld, and your skill at entering craft trances, you have no doubt that inscribing a feat would allow you to master the materials that make up the trident, reforge it down into a weapon of more manageable size while still retaining its magical properties, and add materials and properties of your own. This route comes with two distinct advantages; First and foremost, it would allow you a degree of influence and surveillance over the clearly dangerous Eastvile Drone. Secondly, shaving it down to a size he could use would leave you with spare materials. The downside here is that, since this situation is so unique, you have no way of knowing how long you would be entranced for.
The very thought of working on such a project fills you with glee, despite the behavior of your sponsor, and also refreshes your resolve.
"Impressive toy." You reply with a solem nod,
"I'll think about helping you with it." With that, you pull yourself free from the drone's embrace and enter your lodgings.
"Don't keep you biggest fan waiting for too long, darling!" He calls as you walk away, waving the dangerous scepter in your general direction.
---
Soil Survey Progress Report:Progress is moving faster than expected, my queen. It turns out, when you attempt a soil survey in a town full of diggers restless and eager for employment, children, elderly, and those with spare time volunteer to provide extra labor! I am pleased to report that the survey is 6/10ths complete!
-Foreman Blackspade
Fucking useless piece of shit goblins!
What I mean to say, pardon my gnomish, is that your husbands should have sent us more overseers. 1:5 LU drivers to slaves is not a great ratio. Some of the dumb peons slipped away from the group while we were in Goldears, and started stealing fancy garnets off of clotheslines. I was able to talk the humans out of imprisioning our workers, or worse, but the whole debacle cost us time and money. We were only able to ship half the haul, and will still need a full 9 LU to finish the job next month. I also had to call upon your court to send me two Wealth from the treasury to pay the fines our simpleminded peons incurred. I'll make sure our other workers pitch in on babysitting duty next time.
-Kang Wretchedfence, Caravan Leader
Labor continues, crop yield meets expectations, whores are still present. One of the more prudish hobbit workers finds the Pubic Eyeball epidemic so horrifying, that he is trying to pass the hat around to hire the Assassins guild to handle the prostitutes. So far he hasn't had much luck, but I find his efforts amusing nonetheless.
-Phalanx Officer Lexington
-Silent Hammers was prepared for the were-eagle attack this month and damage, both to population and structures, was minimal. There were four this time, and only one was slain, so another round is to be expected next month.
-It is believed that everybody injured by the eagles has been properly quarantined, although your advisors note that Silent Hammers lacks a dedicated dungeon that could actually hold an angry werebeing. It is recommended you either kill the patients, or bargain with Count Chance to keep them in his dungeon.
-Ukareem is rather upset that his wife is living in a werebeing infested town, and is willing to provide the labor and materials to construct a cloister were you can train werebeing hunting monks. You just need to select a spot for construction.
-Prince Neptune has crafted you a fine set of full Bloodstone Plate Armor with a sturdy pike. Bloodstone is comparable to Iron in terms of material quality. You decide to keep the gear for now, as you'd likely waste months trying to make it just so if you decided to craft your own non-artifact armor. He claims to have been chatting with goons from the Hobbit Mod, and now puts the cost of his Gem Forge at 12 gold, factoring in the mercenary labor required to run the remaining humans out of town and demolish their homes to make space for his project.
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Topic: (SG) Rise of the Smith Lord (Read 20790 times)