Use Salthammer to smash Xan's GOD HARVESTER, and ruin the already produced god paste by adding way too much salt to it.
This should provide sufficient salt to create a SALTHAMMER 40,000.
[2] You attempt to teleport to Xantalos' kingdom and smash his blender, but the teleporting goes vastly wrong and you are now
inside the blender. You are covered in soul paste, and can barely move. Thankfully, the blender's been turned off for a moment.
You don't want it to turn on.
Immortality is good. See if I can actually drink more coffee.
[6] You try and drink more coffee, which has an interesting interaction with your immortal physiology. Specifically, you're starting to turn INTO coffee. Whatever the hell that entails. Maaaaybe you should ease up on the caffeine.
Scare the captain of the ocean liner to death, then make his body a new host for my spirit.
Use hypnosis to brainwash passengers, making them view me as their God.
Drain the lifeforce from a half of my new followers, making me a superhuman.
[1]
[6]
[5]
The captain of the ocean liner is an utter badass and doesn't even bat an eye, forcibly kicking you out of his cabin through sheer machismo. You do a much better job with the crew, who cannot deal with this intrusion of the supernatural and kowtow to you instantly. To be honest, they're getting kinda creepy about it, making sacrifices of various pets and loved ones.
Deciding to enter the realm of the living again, you use this faith to make yourself a nice new body, superior to your old one. +1 bonus to physical rolls only. Remind me of this bonus cause I'm going to forget eventually.
"Look a distraction!"
Use the moment she looks away to karate chop her in the neck knocking her out.
[1] She...doesn't really have a neck. While you're hand hovers mid-strike, indecisively, the Receptionist bears down, and
bites your right arm off. You'd best not roll a [1] next turn.
Protect Ra and Set and find where the gods are disappearing to.
[3] You try and weave protective magic around Ra and Set, but since apparently the god suctioning isn't going on at this very moment, you can't tell if it works.
[6] Attempting to scry the source of whatever is kidnapping your gods, you accidentally get teleported into Xantalos' realm. Whoops. At least now you know where the action is.
Remove these... "Skrzaks". From existence.
[4] Walking into the village, you can feel, not necessarily see, the imps stalk the roofs of the various huts and buildings. They watch you, cackling. With a wave of your hand, you attempt to disintegrate the lot. With a cry of what you estimate to be pain or surprise, a great many of them vanish into the ether. You haven't cleared the entire infestation yet, and now the cackling grows louder around you.
Conjure up a mascot for my coffeeshop, who will promptly go about and advertise.
[6] You create a living mascot
*insert description here*, who instantly draws whatever villagers are still alive into your coffeeshop. You swear, it's almost as if its using mind control...
Author
Topic: MINIMALIST MAGE RTD (Read 81764 times)