Operation Begins: Make Puppyguard SufferSo it isn't enough to just kill him. That would be too easy. I must make him suffer as I have, and cause him to lose a lover.
First off, I have to see if he is currently single. He is, and to make things better he worships the goddess of justice Babin. How hilariously appropriate. Next, use DFhack gaydar to see if he is straight. He is. So I just need to find a straight woman within ten years of his age, marry them, then murder her. I was wanting a way to test this new trap design anyway.
I found a woman who will be wed to Puppyguard! She is 66 years old, which is only 6 away from Puppyguard's 72. She is straight, she has been renamed Puppytreat, and she will die. We aren't losing much, only another legendary observer, of which we have plenty, and a high master fish cleaner, which is effectively useless without a river. That makes her as useless as can be, which in turn makes me very happy.
These magma crabs keep giving birth in their cages. We should do something with them...
For the marriage chamber, I am making ten of the most romantic statues I can think of.
It has begun. I have turned off the library, tavern and church so Puppyguard and Puppytreat will always be in their respective rooms when not eating. And would you look at that, their rooms are directly adjacent to one another...
Hey, some of those trees that started growing in the underground tree farm have become actual trees. I'm gonna wait to give chopping orders until some more grow though.
And here I was thinking we were fresh out of werebeasts. Hello my smelly friend. I took the emergency action that is pulling the lever and locking her outside, unfortunately she killed the dwarf who spotted her though. Even more unfortunate is that she left the map without dying. Dang it.
Puppyguard seems to be very resistant to the idea of marriage, as neither he nor Puppytreat have spent much time in their bedrooms. Just marry her already, it's been a freaking month dude. Even more confusing is how they keep going to pray at the disabled church. I set the zone to inactive, do I have to delete it as well?
That seems to have fixed it. I deleted the zones and now they are spending more time in their rooms and just being idle in general. Perfect.
So this is a glitch that I was unaware of until now, but you know Tun right? That dwarf who got mauled to death by a were skunk? Well for some reason they aren't entombing her corpse and are telling me she is missing. Even after they moved her corpse to the corpse stockpile. So I'm just gonna have to engrave a slab and hope for the best.
Tun was finally found dead. I don't know why that took so long but okay.
Might as well show you that FB trap I built. You see these impulse ramps?
This is a similar design as the Hell's Bastions I built in Windlock, for anybody reading that. A floor grate is built above the ramps, with a minecart on top. At the pull of a lever the cart falls onto the impulse ramps, sending it flying along the tracks to collide with the FB while full of rocks. They each average at 1300 Urists, so they definitely have enough force to cause significant damage to an FB if it doesn't kill it outright.
Here are the floor grates and levers exactly one Z level above. The levers work as you'd expect, the top one activates the top HB and the bottom one activates the bottom HB. That human soldier you see there is a little fort life hack, I have a special squad called HB Duty set to have one guy stationed there at all times. In case of FB invasion, I lock the doors leaving him inside and set his squad to inactive, leaving him off duty and capable of pulling the lever immediately. This is only set up for the HB's at the moment.
So Hun, my favorite forum user, mind doing me a favor at your turn? The problem I've made myself is that I only have about five months left until autumn, the end of my turn. That is not enough time to get Puppytreat and Puppyguard from friendly terms to lover. That means that by the time they marry, I won't be in control of the fort, you will. So... I built this as a bribe in hopes that you'll murder Puppytreat when the time comes.
Pretty please
![Cheesy :D](http://97.107.128.126/smf/Smileys/aaron/cheesy.gif)