I think you misunderstood me. I don't get killed by wildlife and recruits, I kill them, but get virtually no experience from it. Consequently, I get aced by an average goblin spearman although I have full set of iron armor, an iron shield, and the starting attributes recommended by the quick start guide.
The quickstart guide is out of date and short on helpful information. High strength is only an edge at the start, by giving more carrying capacity and higher early damage, but strength above agility will reduce your maximum speed, which is far more critical. You want higher agility, and good endurance so you can get the attack rate benefit of staying in jog mode with less stamina loss.
What specific starting attributes & skills do you recommend then?
Points in Agility, Spatial and Kinesthetic Senses will give you a great starting edge in every skill requiring physical movement.
If you put points in Strength I'd recommend matching it with Agility; in the early game extra strength improves your speed by reducing encumbrance, but in the late game it adds more proportionate body mass, which brings your max speed down. I've maxed out at Superior Strength and Superhuman Agility and my Jog rate is 1.805. Elves naturally have better, but humans can reach close to 2.0.
Any points in Endurance will help you maintain Jog rate perpetually, and recover stamina quicker after doing more strenuous combat maneuvers. If you become Tired, the penalties make combat much more risky! If you keep dodging out of reach, you can safely wait 10 ticks at a time to permit yourself to recover.
Points in Toughness and Willpower improve pain resistance, Toughness additionally makes your tissue layers more resilient, while Willpower additionally helps resist the effects of Tiredness, Drowsiness, any other physical discomforting conditions.
Intuition isn't a dump stat, and if you don't put points in, at least don't take points away! This helps you anticipate your opponent's actions and judge their rate of attack sooner.
For starting Skills, points in the basics, Fighter/Archer/Throwing/Dodging/Armor/Shield, and something in all unarmed fighting skills will make you proficient enough with any weapon. Don't bother spending into a weapon skill because you can never tell which will be the best available weapon you can acquire earliest. I like to use a pick myself, and Mining can't be initially trained but Novice Fighter is enough to put it to good use.
You should eventually cross train in all weapons, so you can switch to the weapon best suited to the opponent.