Topic: Ineth Zafal, a Humankin fortress (Read 36157 times)

Bearskie · « **Reply #285 on:** October 13, 2017, 07:50:34 am »

Siege

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It was only a matter of time before four goblins stumble across the strange hole in the hill, and begin descending towards our little hideout…

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I take a while to consider our options. Luke is a professional hammerman, but he’s only one guy. I think he might be able to handle four goblins, but he’d be exerted, and there’s more coming down that hole. Albeit we could spread them out by using civilians as bait. Hmm. Bottom line is we need more firepower.

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So we’ve got a nice little camp going on here, humankin eating mushrooms, singing songs, performing little dances. By and large, everyone is happy, apart from the posh pricks who don’t like sleeping on premium cave grass. Alright everyone, chill times over. It’s time to DIE.

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I draft some civilians into a wrestler squad, The Cobalt Urns. Well, that’s the official name for it. But I’m going to call them...

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We’ve got two miners down here with picks. I’ve had bad experience with military miners before, and nothing assures me they’re not going to run off and pickup equipment on the surface, but at this point I really don’t care if they do, because my faith in dwarven intelligence has officially evaporated today. I draft them into Strike Squad. Alright boys, time to execute our guerrilla as-

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I knew it.

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What the hell is wrong with you people? What could be so bloody important to get, that you have to dive past thirty goblins to get I mean seriously m-

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This is Boatmurdered all over again isn’t it.

Fleeting Frames · « **Reply #286 on:** October 13, 2017, 10:14:07 am »

You fled the surface...And ghosts followed! How Cute!

Might want to give the pickaxes to two dwarves for military defence.

...

The scholars? In league with the goblins? Who could have foreseen this??

...

I thought foreign legion went aboveground to loot the dead comrades?

Still, I say, this feels like a proper siege. "Refugees from x fled Ineth Zafal shortly before an army from The Vile Fiends descended upon the place."

[/hr]

Hm. Don't goblins path to meeting areas?

And I recall you made some in the caverns to pray...

Prayer literally makes things worse D=.

You need to first make them not miners, then give them picks and uniform. Also, disable waterskins/backpacks, lest they go pick up those on the surface as well.

...Or socks, I suppose, if you didn't use replace clothes.

Spriggans · « **Reply #287 on:** October 13, 2017, 10:48:53 am »

Socks are important.
Socks protect your feet.
No feet protection, you take one blow, your foot's gone.
No foot, no walking.
No walking, and you're screwed. Just like Rud.

Dwarves ain't stupid or crazy, they're just rationnal.

JStheguy · « **Reply #288 on:** October 15, 2017, 11:45:20 pm »

Quote from: Spriggans on October 13, 2017, 10:48:53 am

Socks are important.
Socks protect your feet.
No feet protection, you take one blow, your foot's gone.
No foot, no walking.
No walking, and you're screwed. Just like Rud.

Dwarves ain't stupid or crazy, they're just rationnal.

Aye, and socks are a vital part of dwarven dress, to be bereft of a sock is to be bereft of your dignity.

Bearskie · « **Reply #289 on:** October 16, 2017, 11:19:54 am »

Siege

It suddenly dawns on me that through some blind fluke of luck and neverending warrior visitors, the siege is now receding. Only about 30 invaders remain, slowly leaving the map.

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Luke emerges onto the surface, presumably searching for his fabled socks. He’s gotten all his equipment. I gasp. Luke! It’s time to fulfil your destiny! To defend Ineth Zafal against the goblin mena- Luke wait where are you going damnit.

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I notice another military guy emerge from the damn hole. If only you guys would stop searching for socks…

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I know precisely what to name you.

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Meanwhile, I finally realise what Luke is trying to do.

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He wants to be a good citizen and pick litter across the battlefield! WELL TOO BAD LUKE ITS NOT LIKE WE NEED YOU TO SAVE THE FORT OR ANYTHING. THAT'S RUD'S CORPSE YER WALKIN' OVER, AND SHE WAS A FIGHTER.

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And now he’s gotten back to looting from the dead, cause Luke sure as hell ain’t no saint by now.

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Luke you’ve got to be kidding me by now. Like I know Tatooine is dry and hot as hell, but really?

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After what must have been weeks by now, I gather the straggling remains of our army at the gates of D2.

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And the doors open once more.

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And of course they all proceed to pick up equipment. Fuck you guys. Where is Kenobi?

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That’s it, I’ve had enough of this shit. Luke, mop these guys up like yesterday’s trash.

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NO LUKE.
NO.

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STOP STORING ITEMS IN BINS.
FUCK. LUKE.

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DROP IT.
DROP THE SOCK I SWEAR TO GOD LUKE, OR FEEL THE WRATH OF THE SITH UPON YOUR PUNY MINDLESS SKULL.

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WHERE IS THIS BIN.
FUCK IT IMMA FORBID EVERYTHING.

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Everyone’s like fucking out of Sanctume’s tile at this point, and I don't care.

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And of course you would try to engage the highly dangerous goblin pikeman at the bottom of the moat, because why not.

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That’s it goblins. We surrender.

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Wait, Luke?

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LUKE GOING TO SOLO THE TROLLS.

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AAAAHHHH I CANT WATCH I CANT.

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FUCKING IDIOT LUKE. WHO’S GOING TO SAVE THE FORT NOW? GODDAMN KENOBI?

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HE’S LIKE GODDAMN HUNDRED AND THIRTY-FOUR YEARS OLD LUKE.

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Stay tuned, save coming right up.

Bearskie · « **Reply #290 on:** October 16, 2017, 12:31:19 pm »

Siege
(well, sorta)

The goblins eventually leave on their own, presumably baffled by our sheer stupidity.

"Sah! These dwarves keep throwin' themselfs at us butt nekked! Sir, this ain't no covered in basic goblin trainin'!"
"Musta be atrap! Dem dwarves can't be this stupid! They musta be luring us into one of those dwarfangled magmoo obsiden cavy traps! All squads, retreat to the Dark Fortress for further orders!"

Everything else soon goes back to normal by and large, apart from the twenty odd trolls camping out in JS’s square. Dim-witted creatures that don't know how to recognize a dwarven trap. If they were to march north towards us, we'd be toast. A troll can easily take on twenty unarmed dwarves, and even if they were armed I don’t like our odds. We could hide out in Sanctume’s for the rest of the siege, but something tells me they’re not leaving any time soon. Plenty of doors to chew.

I stop and consider. And then the most evil, brilliant idea comes into my head.

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I order the dwarves to move everything to my square. All the essentials, food, drink, as many as we can scrounge, weapons and seeds. Everything that we would need for a self-sustaining colony. I forbid JS’s square to prevent bloody idiots from waking up the trolls, hoping we can do this silently, and max out the traffic designations so that even the military won’t be stupid enough to walk through.

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Operation Elf-Evac is a go.

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Thus begins the actual start of my turn in writeup. I've already finished my year ingame though, so I'll be passing it over to Sanctume.

Suffice to say, I planned a Tree and a Kingdom, and got half of each. I breached the caverns, defoliated the caverns, flooded the caverns, burned the caverns, and unflooded the caverns. I have secured my own settlement - now one of two sealable tiles. I have laid the foundations for a new military, though they may still be green. I murdered alot of people.

Oh, and I now have my own forgotten beast. He breathes fire.

SAVE

Sanctume · « **Reply #291 on:** October 16, 2017, 12:44:29 pm »

Grrreat. This sounds like a setback for the humankin movement. It shall be corrected even if we pin the trolls with wooden sticks.

I must continue my road project and quarry. If I recall correctly, part of the north road is a bridge above the river. It's a perfect traffic deterrence.

I shall peruse these issues whence I arrive to my domicile as soon as the sun set.

Bearskie · « **Reply #292 on:** October 16, 2017, 12:54:35 pm »

Oh, and umm, how should I say this. You may arrive at your domicile and find it, um, sealed. As in, um, there may be noone inside to unseal it, um, because...err, they're all dead. From dehydration.

._.

Japa, can I have another turn?

Rose · « **Reply #293 on:** October 16, 2017, 12:57:06 pm »

Yeah, I'll add you back to the end of the list.

Rose · « **Reply #294 on:** October 16, 2017, 01:15:51 pm »

Updated the turn list.

I'll update the map tomorrow.

Sanctume · « **Reply #295 on:** October 16, 2017, 01:59:26 pm »

Quote from: Bearskie on October 16, 2017, 12:54:35 pm

Oh, and umm, how should I say this. You may arrive at your domicile and find it, um, sealed. As in, um, there may be noone inside to unseal it, um, because...err, they're all dead. From dehydration.

._.

Japa, can I have another turn?

The moat is but soft dirt, shallow to a fault. To the north east corner of it, a stone door and hatch that is unlockable to humankins.

I wonder if excavating the D2 quarry will reach a hollow to reach the roots of the unholy tree.

Fleeting Frames · « **Reply #296 on:** October 16, 2017, 05:58:54 pm »

Luke amuses me. Unwilling. Not a hero.

But seriously, it's frustrating when they don't follow any orders.

...Bins sure can store lot of clothes. F bins, tho.

RIP Luke. So many trolls.

The trolls need some blending.

Oh, and finished?

*looks in upper right corner*

|

|

That was only two thirds of spring!

Bearskie, your turn was too extreme, I take it.

Good luck, Sanctume.

Sanctume · « **Reply #297 on:** October 16, 2017, 10:08:02 pm »

Ch 4: Et Asinus Praesepe

1 Granite, 258

Six years has passed, and the year starts with an announcement of a dead cavy, and a child playing in a tree.

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And I see that indeed, we have reach city-hood. Shall I say welcome to The City of Air? Our population of 121 citizens will surely inform us about achievements and happiness…

Wait, there is no broker nor a record keeper. We are a duchy of Duchess Udie.
There is a Mayor Ur, Captain Kenobi, Commander Unfortunate Nek, Manager Minkot, Doctor Tequil, and six squad captains: Falcon, Da Vinci, Aman, Ilral, Ripper, and Cog.

And we have a resident, uninvited guest.

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Moving on. Manager Minkot will take the record keeping responsibility.

Bora, a human mechanic claims to be a professional appraiser is assigned to the broker.

So, I need to consult with this Commander Nek. I wonder why he is nicknamed as Unfortunate Nek. Oh, so it’s a bad time of the month for a meeting.

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Nevertheless, I surmised the squads, but not quite their potential effectiveness.

Very well, I need a simple plan, some mandates of sorts:
Mine the quarry.
Inventory of armory.
Military training.
Maybe 2nd level walkway and walls in D2.
And road project.

Ooh, shiny.
There is a special “Burnlung” granite weaponrack sitting in a mason’s shop in D2.
I also wonder who is wearing “The Gully of Stakes”, a steel mail shirt.
There is “Typhoonhailed”, a silver crossbow.
There is also “The Grove of Bolting”, a chestnut floodgate.

Next, I need to look over D2.
I hope someone inside can pull the lever to open the south bridge.
Hello? Oh, the hospital is full of the dead.

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Some of the town houses are made available for citizen occupancy.
Construct stairs to reach the 5th floor of the Cruel Barbs inn.
There are a bunch of visitors in the tavern, I doubt they understand “pull lever” to open the bridge.

I might as well order a few things to do now:
Cut all the trees in D2.
Plan digging of another layer in the quarry with everything still under light.
Plan to build D2 second level walk way, and wall, but later.

To reach D2, build a sky bridge from Neblime’s military complex from the west.

Spoiler: Sky Bridge to D2 (click to show/hide)

Save.