Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[OceanSoul]

Muda turns the hooligans into kindergarteners.

((I'm still going to whip the shit out of them even if that succeeds. Victor Superbia is a champion child-punter.))

In that case, you're welcome.

[Tymewalk]

XX121

Leap out of the ground, happen to pounce on Charles.

Burst Out Of Ground: 1d10 = 1

You attempt to burst out of the ground, but your head seems to find a water pipe, cracking the pipe and bruising you heavily.

The small hole you're in is now flooding with water, which is certainly not fun.

(I can't believe that worked XD)

Regenerate all wounds to get self back to peak human being.

Regenerate: 1d10 = 10

As you regenerate, you feel a strange energy flowing through your body, as if you can now harness some energy you never felt before.

You look down, and notice you are both glowing and floating. Which is probably good, maybe bad, but probably still good! Hopefully.

((I smell a firefly reference))
Zefer
Equip the chain of command and see how recruitment is going, then go try to get back in contact with my guys.

(Indeed)

You are in command, so you naturally are able to equip.

Recruit People: 1d10 = 9

You have successfully managed to recruit a small army. And by "small" army I mean a very large one.

I am not good at describing things.

I don't care what you say,for me this still needs more players

Name: Bob
Gender: Apache Attack Helicopter
Age: 19
Appearance: A generic human...just kidding he has a M230 Chain Gun strapped to his back and he is around 2.20m
Appearance of your house: it looks like it would be a self-made hideout in the middle of the woods,but it's inside a house
Inventory:
30mm Rounds
M230 Chain Gun
Karambit Dragon Lore
1 fuck
A paper with a dick drawn on it
Personality: A nice kind of a guy,if you fuck with him get a 30mm cannon into your face
Do not write in this space:
List three of your favorite things: Apache attack helicopter, GTA 5, A experimental plasma rifle modified to shoot a beam of gut-liquifying plasma
Fill in the blanks - M230 Chain Gun: Now with 20% more M799 High Explosive Incendiary Rounds!
Place whatever you want here: Womble is a faggot

Accepted!

You wake up in your house, preparing your 30mm cannon for a lovely day of blowing up absolutely everything.

Oh look, there's a lot of people outside. You would wonder what they're up to, but you're too busy wondering if you'll be impaled on that one guy's shovel, too.

Manworm:

Ask Jeff what he wants to do with his life. A parent always worries about their kid's future.

Jeff: Do Something: 1d10 = 4

"Like, bake cookies? I've always wanted to open a little shop."

Keep in mind that Jeff is only 3 minutes old.

Well, Roger tries to brush himself off, and introduce himself to the group (which appears to be Victor, Shovel Knight, Frank, and a Ferret? maybe more?). He offers the gathered HYPE as a refreshing beverage, or a satisfying snack.

Introduce Self: 1d10 = 8

You introduce yourself to the group rather calmly and eloquently, offering the HYPE as a delicious and nutritious snack when you're out doing... uh...

Wait, what exactly is happening? Like, can you eat hype when in a pocket dimension?

Also, now that you're out of the other dimension, how is the emotion still a physical construct?

GM: Make Diagram: 1d10 = 3

Luckily, I was able to assemble a quick diagram:

Spoiler: Diagram (Image) (click to show/hide)

I am not a very good artist.

"Shovel Knight! I am dying. Help! I am an old man! I must be a questgiver!

I need a Turkey or a Big Fish to restore my health points! Yeah, that should fix the bullet holes.

Now get on it, you whippersnapper."

In the meantime, Frank attempts to heal himself by sacrificing imaginary kittens to the ancient ones.

Sacrifice Imaginary Kittens: 1d10 = 3

...yeah, it turns out sacrificing pretend kittens doesn't work so well.

Maybe if you sacrificed real kittens...

"Well, that's okay too I guess. Hooligan 1, stand up and prepare for failure correction."

Flog hooligan 1's back with my chain, not too much though so he can survive but enough that it is unforgettably painful. Inspire enough fear in the hooligans by this display of unforgiving brutality in order to enhance their future performance of commands.

Flog: 1d10 = 5

Flogging successful.

...what? It's a five. I mean, there's not much variety in those rolls.

Hooligans: Be Afraid: 1d10 = 3

They're not that afraid. I mean, they're a little afraid, but not that afraid.

Real me reasons that, since Coolrune206's and Flabort's characters were both impaled at the end of Shovel Knight's shovel, in the same way, without either one getting off, they have become the same person.

Muda turns the hooligans into kindergarteners.

OceanSoul: Make Logic Happen: 1d10 = 7

Well, they certainly aren't the same person, probably. They were impaled though, and are probably both in great pain.

Change Hoodlums Into Kindergarteners: 1d10 = 9

All the hoodlums have been turned into Kindergarteners, complete with lunch boxes, backpacks, coloring books, that one kid who hogs all the good crayon colors, and even art you know is bad but you'll hang on the fridge anyways.

Real me reasons that, since Coolrune206's and Flabort's characters were both impaled at the end of Shovel Knight's shovel, in the same way, without either one getting off, they have become the same person.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Uuuhhhhhh. Should I wait for a ruling on this before tymewalk before I post?

They're both alive, they've just been impaled on your JUSTICE Sho

[PaPaj]

Walk's outside the house
"Oi what is happening out here?"

[Enemy post]

XX121

Escape from the flooding water.

[NRDL]

Manworm:

"Let's go then!"

Get Jeff back into stable reality, and try and acquire a business loan to help him startup a small bakery.

[Coolrune206]

Summon real kittens using magic. Sacrifice real kittens for power and health.

[OceanSoul]

Turn Frank into a kitten. If I rolled enough to be successful, put extra value of roll toward making other PCs kittens.

[PaPaj]

i will shoot you Ocean,i count that as fucking with me

[mross]

After removing the unfortunate innocents from his JUSTICE SHOVEL, SHOVEL KNIGHT somersaults off on another adventure!

He must find a TURKEY or a BIG FISH. SHOVEL KNIGHT knows such rare culinary artifacts can only be found in one of the following locations:

• THE FOREBODING CASTLE
• THE DOOM SWAMPS
• THE DEFILED CRYPT
• THE CRIMSON JUNGLE
• THE CORRUPTED DESERT
• THE CAVE OF THE DARK ONE

[flabort]

"I... appreciate it, Shovel Knight."
Roger returns to his house a bit shaken from his dimensional ordeal, to grab himself another glass of chocolate milk.

[CABL]

Okay, I want to apply for this RTD.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Name: Microsoft SamBot 2125
Gender: Robot
Age: N/A
Appearance: Old bald guy with tons of wrinkles on his face. Wears a formal suit.
Appearance of your house: A time machine developed by Microsoft.
Inventory: 10mm WSS (Weapon Sub-System), retractable electric wrist blades, Microsoft Policeman (a program which is used to scan the area up to 50 kilometers for unlicensed Windows OS), and titanium-chromium alloys (that's what Microsoft SamBot 2125 is built from).
Personality: A slightly misanthropic android with Microsoft Sam voice. Will always obey Microsoft, no matter what, even if they'll say to burn the kindergarten with children in it to ash. Programmed to hate computer piracy, and especially when it touches Microsoft products.
Do not write in this space: Soisoisoisoisoisoisoi
List three of your favorite things: Microsoft, Windows OS, justice.
Fill in the blanks - Microsoft SamBot 2125: Now with 20% more justice!
Place whatever you want here: Soisoisoisoisoisoisoi

First action: Scan the city for unlicensed/pirated Windows OS with Microsoft Policeman program. If the action is successful, go to the nearest house with unlicensed/pirated Windows OS, and knock on the door. If the resident opens the door, scream at him, "You have stolen Microsoft Corporation property! If you don't want problems with the law enforcement of the United Earth, then you should let me in, immediately!" If the resident doesn't open the door, use my wrist blades to cut through it, and enter the house.

[Zefermcdwarfpants]

Now the fun begins.
Start to weed the general army into branches. Then send these poor bastards to boot camp for basics. Have Morpheus or Posideon find me some more commanding officers.

[Mallos]

"If any of you little runts thinks this means you can quit, you're god damn wrong. You'll serve me to the death, even if it makes me look like Kony."

Punt the smallest of them like a ball aimed for OceanSoul. Terrify the rest into complete obedience.

[Tymewalk]

Walk's outside the house
"Oi what is happening out here?"

Walk Outside House: 1d10 = 6

You walk outside, with a pep in your step, and look around.

...you have absolutely no clue what's going on.

XX121

Escape from the flooding water.

Escape: 1d10 = 9

You leap out of the flooding water, perfectly dry, as the sheer force from your leap dried you like one of those cool Dyson hand-driers they have in some places. Man, those things are awesome.

Manworm:

"Let's go then!"

Get Jeff back into stable reality, and try and acquire a business loan to help him startup a small bakery.

Get Jeff Into Reality: 1d10 = 3

You're in Realitee™. Which is not reality.

Everything appears to be poorly drawn on cardboard, and looks like it was made by an underpaid intern in 15 minutes with MS Paint in the middle of the night.

You seem to be unaffected, and Jeff also looks to be fine, so there's that much.

Summon real kittens using magic. Sacrifice real kittens for power and health.

Summon Kittens: 1d10 = 5

You summon some kittens.

Sacrifice: 1d10 = 9

You sacrifice the kittens, successfully regaining all of your health and becoming uninjured.

Turn Frank into a kitten. If I rolled enough to be successful, put extra value of roll toward making other PCs kittens.

Make Frank a KITTY: 1d10 = 3

Frank turns into a Realitee™ kitty. Which is to say, not a very good one.

...in fact, it mostly looks like he's dressed in a really bad kitten costume. This was not a good move.

After removing the unfortunate innocents from his JUSTICE SHOVEL, SHOVEL KNIGHT somersaults off on another adventure!

He must find a TURKEY or a BIG FISH. SHOVEL KNIGHT knows such rare culinary artifacts can only be found in one of the following locations:

• THE FOREBODING CASTLE
• THE DOOM SWAMPS
• THE DEFILED CRYPT
• THE CRIMSON JUNGLE
• THE CORRUPTED DESERT
• THE CAVE OF THE DARK ONE

Find Those Things: 1d10 = 10

...apparently the list did not contain THE STRANGE NEIGHBORHOOD, as you find a very large pile of BIG FISH and TURKEY right next door.

"I... appreciate it, Shovel Knight."
Roger returns to his house a bit shaken from his dimensional ordeal, to grab himself another glass of chocolate milk.

Grab Chocolate Milk: 1d10 = 8

Ah yes, that hits the spot. You can feel the power rushing back to you, as you gain a +1 Chocolate Milk Buff for 3 actions.

Okay, I want to apply for this RTD.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Name: Microsoft SamBot 2125
Gender: Robot
Age: N/A
Appearance: Old bald guy with tons of wrinkles on his face. Wears a formal suit.
Appearance of your house: A time machine developed by Microsoft.
Inventory: 10mm WSS (Weapon Sub-System), retractable electric wrist blades, Microsoft Policeman (a program which is used to scan the area up to 50 kilometers for unlicensed Windows OS), and titanium-chromium alloys (that's what Microsoft SamBot 2125 is built from).
Personality: A slightly misanthropic android with Microsoft Sam voice. Will always obey Microsoft, no matter what, even if they'll say to burn the kindergarten with children in it to ash. Programmed to hate computer piracy, and especially when it touches Microsoft products.
Do not write in this space: Soisoisoisoisoisoisoi
List three of your favorite things: Microsoft, Windows OS, justice.
Fill in the blanks - Microsoft SamBot 2125: Now with 20% more justice!
Place whatever you want here: Soisoisoisoisoisoisoi

First action: Scan the city for unlicensed/pirated Windows OS with Microsoft Policeman program. If the action is successful, go to the nearest house with unlicensed/pirated Windows OS, and knock on the door. If the resident opens the door, scream at him, "You have stolen Microsoft Corporation property! If you don't want problems with the law enforcement of the United Earth, then you should let me in, immediately!" If the resident doesn't open the door, use my wrist blades to cut through it, and enter the house.

It's beautiful. Accepted.


Scan For Unlicensed Windows: 1d10 = 2

You find a DIY window on the wall of someone's house! Clearly they didn't get a professional to install it.

Knock On Door: 1d10 = 3

The door is made of 10cm-thick titanium. There's no way they heard you.

Person Inside: Hear: 1d10 = 1

This is because they are deaf.

Now the fun begins.
Start to weed the general army into branches. Then send these poor bastards to boot camp for basics. Have Morpheus or Posideon find me some more commanding officers.

Weed Out Pansies: 1d10 = 6

The weakest are sent to boot camp for retraining under Commander (is that your title?) Zefer's new program.

Morpheus and Poseidon: Get More Officers: 1d10 = 3

They find the man working at the ice cream shop, and bring him to you.

Along with more ice cream. They seem to have forgotten to bring you some.

"If any of you little runts thinks this means you can quit, you're god damn wrong. You'll serve me to the death, even if it makes me look like Kony."

Punt the smallest of them like a ball aimed for OceanSoul. Terrify the rest into complete obedience.

Punt Kindergartener: 1d10 = 4

It's kind of hard, but you manage to kick one, sending him tumbling towards Muda/OceanSoul.

Kindergarteners: Be Terrified: 1d10 = 4

The others are a little scared, but mostly don't care since Jimmy stole all the red crayons.

[Coolrune206]

Frank points his shotgun at Oceansoul and fills him with lead.