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[UselessMcMiner]

So i had one teddy bear (This is a modded game) Who's husband made her a artifact iron battle axe before being killed by a horde of giant
dingoes. So she used the axe to avenge her husband and killed all the dingoes and saved my fortress from...

Black bears who drank all my alcohol

Thieves who stole all my gems i was going to give to my caravan

The aforementioned dingoes who murdered nearly all my population.

So this planter who i have nicknamed Greeno has currently destroyed a whole werebeast siege by herself and
also chopped a giant ice unicorn with spit that destroys all your nerves in half. She has   also made a giant sheep
made out of gold that has brought my fortress's value to 11 million. So is there any way to force a bronze colossus
to come to my fortress? Because the dfhack command forceevent is not working. or should i just wait and see what happens.

[Staalo]

Why, oh why, after reading this, am I suddenly thinking about some twisted Dwarven version of the classic song Twelve Days of Christmas?

On the Fifth Day of Axemas
my love saved the fort from

Five sieging Werebeasts
Four giant Dingoes
Three sneaky Thieves
Two drunken Black bears

... and a Titan killing spree!

[UselessMcMiner]

Mommy mommy i made you a sword!


Also here's the battleaxe that her (dead) husband made for her a few years ago




(also that engraving on the artifact sword? that was when my fort broke out into a civil war over the treatment of werebeasts
the leader of the anti-werebeast movement won in a fight to the death.)

[Staalo]

Acaguv Saviorechoed the Carnality of Anguish the... duck?

Now there's a story waiting to be told.

[Urist McVoyager]

It's probably another one like Darkwing Netherfowl who took out two clowns by himself during a fight with the Circus.

[UselessMcMiner]

That duck is a ducklord which is just a massive duck with wings that are nearly impossible to break through due to some bugs in the raws. Also how do I force a megabeast to come to my fort because for event isn't working and I can't force titan or bronze colossus and I'm defiantly not ready for the circus yet!

[UselessMcMiner]

Sorry for the double post but because forceEvent doesn't work for me how can i force !!FUN!! to come to my fort

[Urist McVoyager]

The game's pretty resistant to forcing things to happen. If DFHack doesn't work, you probably can't force it to happen.

Usually when someone wants a specific thing to happen, the answer is "Use Legends mode, find the conditions you want, and embark within reach of them. If they don't exist, make a new world."

So in this fort you probably have to hope the luck of the draw hits. Long as you have at least 80 people, you're going to get visitors eventually. Might be a Bronze Colossus, might be a dragon or Minotaur instead. Next world, look in legends in advance, find a living bronze colossus, and try embarking near their lair.

Somebody might have a better answer than this, but considering you've been asking for a couple of days with no response but mine, I'm not sure that'll come up.

[UselessMcMiner]

Well I have a sort of game show set up! I call it Trials of Armok!

In Trials of Arnold your fortress has to defend itself from massive threats

So for season one it was

Maad the roc
Daam the roc
Boudicca the roc

Annabelle the Minotaur
Beatrice the Minotaur
Cherish the Minotaur

It starts with Maad the roc killing patients in the hospital Miney VI rushes in and despite
Losing his paw kills the roc he then sees Boudicca tearing up the hallways leading to
The Golden Sheep a giant sheep made out of gol. He then kills Boudicca and finds
Annabelle and Beatrice the Minotaur killing teddy bears in the temple. He then chops of her head with his pick Miney VI with his missing paw and fighting passes out and is ripped apart by Daam the roc

He of course perishes and I give him a grand Tomb after the trial is over. Now of course his twin
Sister is not happy about that and in retaliation kills Daam by chopping off his wings till he dies
Of blood loss. And Metalo II seeing Cherish the Minotaur killing children and destroying the
Golden Sheep his father was buried in makes him rush to cherish and over the course of
2 Monthes smashes all of her bones and her organs then smashes her face in

Overall that's a win for Shootband!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

(Oh by the way I have 200 teddy bears and 14 million in wealth and that was before all of that delicious candy)

[UselessMcMiner]

I'm sorry for the double post but i hve to post this

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

19th of galena

After the Bidopul was defeated and The Absolute Gloom the murderous teddy bear
was killed all was peaceful in Shootband for a year. But since this is dwarf fortress
it was bound to go crazy at some point. While everyone was praying and drinkig
Metalo II and Shooto had gotten married and Shooto was pregnant! Everyone had
settled into peace. But then!



A horrid stegosaurus made out of tetrahedrite appears! While shooto my best beast hunter
and now wife was about to go and kill the beast her Husband Metalo II and son of the
hero Greeno says don't worry i'l handle it.



yes he did just bite the hill titan into two just like his mum!

also here's the golden sheep i was talking about!



The blood and the dead minotaurs are added because i can't be arsed
dismantling it AGAIN just to clean it

[Staalo]

...AND A TITAN KILLING SPREE!!!

Just what are those teddy bears made out of if they can just bite tetrahedrite megabeasts in half like it's nothing?

[UselessMcMiner]

Welp a forgotten beast just attacked my fortress

Lustot Weremystery the Water of Dungeons the forgotten beast a giant blue 3 eyed crocodile beware its spittle!

When the  beast was discovered and was killing the weavers who ere collecting silk Metalo II's wife Shooty
ignoring all warnings and despite she was nearly about to givr birth rushes at the beast! And decides
to drop her crossbow and goes for her old-fashioned silver hammer!  After a painful fight with the beast
it suffocates! But soon Shooto was about to give into death due to blood loss her god Murudo Wardsearches
appears and tells her something that convinces her to survive


She says your child will be the famed companion of a legendary hero who will save the Realm of Destiny
from the beasts that haunt it so do not give into the light Murudo says

I won't says Shooto.

Shooto wakes up to see all of the fortress congratulating her on her kill. The Great Crystal-Ale of Targets
then commissions an engraving based on her experience



Also the only reason Metalo II was able bite that tian apart was because he was a legendary warrior
and was trained by his mum and had her attributes.

[Urist McVoyager]

I'd still like to know what those teddy bears are made out of. Somehow I don't think it's cotton fluff and button noses.

[UselessMcMiner]

Still just made out of flesh and blood but i really want to show everyone this!


A mountain titan that was a giant humanoid made out of fire with two horns came to my fort
and i sealed it into a prison made out of obsidian! i also engraved a picture of it being sealed
away forever just to taunt it!

Also i have a question 4 of my engravings are of bears being bit by werebeasts so why does it
show a question mark?

[anewaname]

I don't know about your engravings, but imprisoning that fire titan in an obsidian cell and engraving the events, this is the foundation of many high-fantasy tales...

The rumors of hidden dwarf artifacts had lead townfolk into the old fort for years, but it had been completely looted. For years, only the young and poor ventured in search of worked stone or for the thrill of seeing what was there to be seen. But something happened yesterday... The rumbling roar was heard by some shepherds and some men returned to the village with a few carved trinkets and dwarven tools. They told of hallways opened by the collapse, of a carved stone table, a workshop of some sort, a hallway engraved with images of a fiery giant and dwarfs with hammers, and of a warm stone wall.

There was little discussion and much shouting. The dwarfs had forges heated with lava. Dwarfen weapons! And fine goblets. It is a temple dedicated to their fire god Armok! There will be treasure! We will be able to buy more cows. They must have sealed their treasure in there when they left!

Within an hour, more than half the townsfolk were on their way, a few were sneaking off to steal from their neighbors, and the old dwarf, who stopped in a few times a year to work metal for the village, had packed up and left down the road.