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How fun is SPAMKINGDOM series?

Mind-bogglingly popular game series that you follow from early on and cannot stop, waiting for new installment like a drooling addict.
Long-runner soap opera you're too invested into to just stop watching it.
A fun little comic strip in the daily newspaper that's been around forever.
3/6
Who said it's fun? I didn't for sure.
I'm just waiting here for it to die horribly already so it will stop showing on my Unread Posts list.

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Author Topic: SPAMKINGDOM#: Emperor Houlandin IV of Methiant-Cydwyl!  (Read 788417 times)

Blood_Librarian

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3825 on: November 27, 2017, 01:32:21 pm »

THe Army is done. We've essentially lost a significant portion of our fighting force and they need more then two years to cooperate. Soldiers that have had the experience of incompetent leaders still exist, and they are likely the ones that are in part leading the army now. if we push agendas with wars right now, there is a significant chance that it will bite us int he ass. The deal we have right now is fine, ti gives us a chance to push resources  into making technological advances, if anything, we should either ask for the secrets on how to make the fuel or more of it.
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3826 on: November 27, 2017, 01:32:48 pm »

You decide to not risk it, and send the gemstones to the Eldrican, per usual.

1118 AD, End of the Year

You dread this time of the year. Did you do enough saving and profiting to save the Treasury, and, ultimately, the Kingdom, from bankruptcy?

Here comes the Advisor; in his hands, the Scrolls of Kingdom Status lie.

He places them on your desk, and slowly rolls them open in unnecessarily dramatic way...

Happiness: 3
Population: 7
Economy: 1
Army: 3

You rub your temples. A disaster has been barely avoided. The Advisor coughs and then looks at you.

"My liege, I have naught to offer but to slash the Army's budget for a year. Or we could keep the taxes raised."

As for Army budget...

A) Our Army is strill recovering from the war and subsequent revolt. We need to rebuild it!
B) Fine, that will be a fitting punishment for those rebellious bastards!

As for raised taxes...

A) Alas, we can only hope that my subjects will understand - keep the taxes raised.
B) I can't risk people rebel because I strain their pockets this much; we need to lower the taxes.
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Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
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Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
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milo christiansen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3827 on: November 27, 2017, 01:34:02 pm »

Well, we no longer share a boarder with the dwarves, north and south are held by allies, and west holds no interest for us. The next few years should be spent preparing for a rematch in the east.

AA
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After all, coke is for furnaces, not for snorting.
You're not true dwarven royalty unless you own the complete 'Signature Collection' baby-bone bedroom set from NOKEAS

Criptfeind

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3828 on: November 27, 2017, 01:35:53 pm »

BA

Need that cheddar to stay afloat.
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Blood_Librarian

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3829 on: November 27, 2017, 01:37:15 pm »

bb

Think of the peasant houses!
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omada

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3830 on: November 27, 2017, 01:39:53 pm »


Or AB (as the army shall deal with rebels)
or BB Lay low for one year get some money and then return to increase army and stuff
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He is short, with a small and failed beard
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he has a hard time to focus, and values, err almost everything, he dreams of mastering a skill.

birdy51

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3831 on: November 27, 2017, 01:40:40 pm »

BB

We just had a revolt over taxes. If we don't let up- eventually we'll be spending so much money on revolt prevention that both our Army and our Economy will suffer. And as for the army, we just signed a truce with two of our biggest enemies. As long as we don't choose to fight, our Army can be recovered next year when we have monehs. I personally propose a tax break of five years; enough to let the embers of discontent to die down.

Also. We destroyed a fortress. We really should pat ourselves on the back for that!
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BIRDS.

Also started a Let's Play, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duelists of the Roses

Blood_Librarian

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3832 on: November 27, 2017, 01:43:55 pm »

Personally I think we should retire to a more pleasant past time like bird watching.
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mightymushroom

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3833 on: November 27, 2017, 01:51:20 pm »

Peasant houses are already overflowing to the tune of 7 population.

We have ten years to work on the army. I just don't think making happiness even worse at the start of them is helpful.
B B


Natural taxes +1 //mistook the situation, sorry
Population bonus tax +1
Raised taxes +1
Gemstones traded
Silver Mine +1

Bureaucracy -1? (I've never felt sure that making the income department more efficient incurs expense?)
Professional Army -1
Fireblood R&D -1? (still ongoing, though they almost never ask for re-authorization?)

Dogethe's Gift +1

Did I miss some spending last year?
« Last Edit: November 27, 2017, 02:14:34 pm by mightymushroom »
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Blood_Librarian

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3834 on: November 27, 2017, 01:53:53 pm »

Paying off  of our previous failures of being poor.
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Criptfeind

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3835 on: November 27, 2017, 01:54:32 pm »

I'm unsure if natural taxes is a thing. It's something people have relied on for some decisions but I'm really not sure if we actually get that or if it's just assumed to go into all the normal administrative expenses of running a kingdom+small expenses we have that aren't worth an economy.

Edit: Since this is something that's come up time and time again I went ahead and asked the GM. He said that no, we don't.
« Last Edit: November 27, 2017, 01:58:36 pm by Criptfeind »
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Prophet

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3836 on: November 27, 2017, 01:55:25 pm »

As much as I hate to admit it yeah. Those bastards gave us a good one so BB for a little bit while we raise the money to rebuild our army. We've got while after all. A treaty is a treaty and we stick by our word and honor. Even if the treaty was written for us while we had a knife to our back. They'll regret the day that that the didn't finish us off though. They'll know our pain eventually.
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.... You've doomed us all. Granted. Everyone except for traps are executed. Random sci-fi nonsense is required to be taught in schools.
A cute intersex harem with everyone in love with the androgynous king and smart and useful enough into pushing the kingdom forward.

Kashyyk

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3837 on: November 27, 2017, 02:01:28 pm »

BB
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crazyabe

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3838 on: November 27, 2017, 02:06:55 pm »

BB.
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nothing here.

Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM#: King Cyl I of Methiant!
« Reply #3839 on: November 27, 2017, 02:14:49 pm »

You decide to withhold funding from the Army, and lower the taxes to previous amounts.

1119 AD, Spring

You hear of trouble in Kingdom of Eldrican; apparently, the new Tirine king has been rather uncooperative towards Elran III. After the last year was spent on covert hostilities, some insults and dealings with foreign rulers, the conflict blew up into a full-scale war.

Also, a proposal sent by the local Alldivine Cloisters has caused some ruckus amongst your courtiers. Apparently, the Alldivine Cloisterlords wish to establish a sacred land in ex-Zasitost lands. There their worshippers could live under the yoke just hand of theocratic government, to ensure that the faith of Alldivines will remain strong and have some temporal possessions to live on.

What was most surprising is the amount of money offered; almost equal to eight years of profits that taxation of Methiantese peoples could bring.

The proposal came up in the same days when your royal prospectors sent their report; the land around ruins of Zasitost is sparsely populated and thus has a lots of living room, not to mention quite fertile ground for farmlands and such. Colonization and settling of this land could give your subjects much breathing (and breeding, hehe) space, although this would require infusion of some royal funds to kickstart it.

After thorough contemplation on those proposals, you decide to...

A) Sell the land to the Alldivine Cloisters at agreed-to price.
B) Sell the land to the Alldivine Cloisters, but at much higher price; after all we're talking about highest quality farmlands here!
C) Sponsor settlement effort of the eastern lands.
D) Shoot down both ideas.
« Last Edit: November 27, 2017, 02:17:25 pm by Haspen »
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.
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