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[Taricus]

Well, less the door, since you probably don't want to be NEAR that think when it starts as well

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

@Zan if the police are modelled on the civilian police of another country, the FSG would be better equipped and trained for combat.

You make a severe mistake in this assumption, as there is no other country in the world at this time with a population as armed as Forenia.  Regular police of other countries would not be sufficient enough to deal with this.  I think the closest approximation of the capabilities of a regular Forenian officer is would be modern day SWAT, and maybe slightly better as SWAT doesn't have to deal with a populace that is legally able to purchase weapons that are considered illegal in modern countries.

[stabbymcstabstab]

Our police are probably just our MPs and our Tankers. Since they are probably the only people armed and trained to deal with the level of shit a group of armed drunk Forenians with the intent violence can do to an area. And considering that describes about 80% of our population (including Non-natives and extremely young children) we should consider civilian ownership of tanks.

[Mandemon]

Turbados Today!

[NUKE9.13]

The Independent Forenian
For the people, by the people.
Bizarre incident sees 'pacifists' suppressed.
In a brazen display of dictatorial violence, the newly formed PwC party was forcibly disbanded, and several key members disappeared, taken from their homes by forces unknown. The government claims that PwC stood for 'Peace with Cannala', but this is obviously false, as no right-minded Forenian would want peace with the pirate menace. We may never know what their true policies were. Perhaps PwC stood for 'Power with Constraints'. That would certainly evoke a crackdown from our current government.
Continued on page 4.

Heroes's graves defiled, navy incapable of protecting sacred site.
Cannalan boots trod upon the sacred soil of Mt. Konstantin, the mountainous island where many Forenian heroes are burried. A civil war veteran had this to say: "These were people both sides of the war could respect. Whether we hated or loved them, we respected them at the same time. To see their resting place disturbed is... disturbing"
Reports indicate that Forenian forces were forced to pull back amidst devastating naval and aerial bombardment, with Cannala's navy all but unopposed. Enemy troops then entered into the mountains, proceeding to march and drive across the burial sites of hundreds of years worth of heroes. A bitter reminder of our navy's incompetence. Who will answer for their failure?
Continued on page 7.

Larger than usual explosion injures bystanders at bike race.
Tragedy struck at a recent sporting event, as a custom-built bike outfitted with one too many rocket boosters exploded on the starting line. Several participants were killed, but more shockingly several innocent audience members were struck by shrapnel, with several requiring emergency surgery. The failure of the race organisers to erect a sufficiently strong shrapnel-deflection barrier is being investigated. This has led to renewed calls for rocket-bike racing to be regulated more strictly, perhaps even going so far as to limit the amount of rockets that may be attached to a single bike.
Continued on page 8.

[evictedSaint]

This has led to renewed calls for rocket-bike racing to be regulated more strictly, perhaps even going so far as to limit the amount of rockets that may be attached to a single bike.

PAROIP: "What kind of commie bullshit is this?"

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

Got bored.  Decided to use my nonaligned status to compile a list of all the rolls and difficulties of the designs made before the incoming turn to see which side is luckier.  Didn't write down which designs the rolls were tied to after seeing that doing so would cause significant salt. 

Forenia:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1: 1 (Easy), 2 (Very Hard)
2: 2 (Normal), 1 (Hard), 1 (Very Hard)
3: 2 (Hard), 1 (Very Hard)
4: 2 (Normal)
5: 1 (Very Hard)
6: 1 (Easy), 3 (Hard), 1 (Very Hard)

That would be 10 in the lower half for Forenia, and 8 in the upper half.

Canalla:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1: 1 (Normal), 1 (Hard), 1 (Very Hard)
2: 1 (Easy)
3: 2 (Normal)
4: 1 (Very Hard)
5: 1 (Easy), 3 (Hard)
6: 1 (Normal), 2 (Hard), 1 ((Very ??) Hard)

That would be 6 in the lower and 9 in the upper.


Overall, it looks like Canalla is doing a lot better on the rolls than Forenia is.

[evictedSaint]

RNGod decided Cannalan's need the help.

[Aseaheru]

 Well, if thats the case, they just decided we dont. We just got, what, a 1, 4, 1, 4?

[piratejoe]

Evicted, you mean nuffle. Saying his name wrong or calling him by the name of a particular prominent catholic with RN before the J or RNG replacing the J draws his ire....Trust me, I know this.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

Well, if thats the case, they just decided we dont. We just got, what, a 1, 4, 1, 4?

That still keeps you balanced decisively on having more rolls on the upper side of the spectrum than the lower side.

[RAM]

A Guano of Anarchists has potentially announced that the island nation formerly known as was doomed by their chaotic influence. It was all them. They lament the consistency with which Foreignia is consuming all before it, and the tragic loss of Peterson's Goat Ranch, but the graffitti, found in numerous locations, assures that such movements were necessary, generally, as variations in phrasing produce some ambiguity. Apparently, the island was "lookin' funny at us" and thus it was necessary to immediately seek an apology from them...

[Mandemon]

Turbados Today!

With news everyone kinda expects.

[Taricus]

The NFPP would like to say that they did not assassinate El Presidente. However, the method and efficiency of the attack is to be commended and the plotters behind it to be named as 'Heroes of Forenia' for taking out one of the worst examples of humanity. And a few grumbles about not being the ones responsible for offing El Presidente.

[Mandemon]

Of course a Juraki war criminal would be happy about use of illegal weapons against head of state.

Not even Hitler was willing to use chemical weapons and here we have, Juraki war criminals happily commenting about use of their illegal weapons.

It will be great to see you at the Nuremberg.