holy fuck op TL;DR please think of the shitposters who only clicked the thread because this was the final update, i have a life to live and i can't easily get all the important details through all that fluff in the final update
Well, I always meant to have a short version of events on
The Wiki but that's not very thoroughly filled-out, since I got lazy. I guess I would sum it up something like this:
The Forenian War-Some people fucked tigers
-Some other people demanded identification papers
-They tried to kill each other
-They both went from having garbage weapons to pretty cool weapons
-Especially, the paper nerds made assault rifles in 1934 and they won
-Honorary mention to the tiger fuckers for wearing bulletproof metal armor
-Actually, they decided to make up and be one big happy family
-They made cool airplanes but never boats, this comes up later
-Also somebody went to space but probably died
The Turbados War-Some people stole ships and drank grog
-Some people ate sushi and acted all stuffy
-They both went from having garbage weapons to pretty cool weapons
-They also both had boats, but especially the pirates
-When the pirates started winning the samurai made poison gas, very dishonorable!
-At some point a few ships started mysteriously disappearing
-Pirates won anyway. They also cheated in a duel with the samurai leader to end the war.
-Turbados is called Cannala now
The Archipelago War-One of the paper nerds did not want to be friends with the tiger fuckers after all
-He actually stole boats from the pirates, out-pirating them
-Nobody realized this was going on
-He disguised himself as a Forenian and attacked Cannala, then disguised himself as a Cannalan and attacked the Forenians
-Now there is a war between the islands. It is going badly for Forenia because they did not into boats.
-The Cannalans joined the Allies and the Forenians joined the Axis. evictedSaint tried to make them not join the Axis.
-The guy who started the war, still unknown, starts helping the Cannalans win a bit
-So do some dweebs called Vlanlados, but they die fast because they are bad at keeping secrets
-Forenia made VERY COOL sunglasses
-Cannala made guided missiles, and also helicopters but they called them 'pteros
-Forenia made submarines but a little bit on the late side
-Both sides conquer Vlanlados for Uranium
-Cannala ultimately won despite Forenia have COOL sunglasses, which honestly may have been a misjudgement on my part
The Final Battle-As usual, diplomacy turns into people slapping each other
-This time it's because the Cannalans backed the Ultimate Paper Nerd who started the war (that's Andres) in a coup
-Both Cannala and Forenia build rockets to absolutely F L E X on the United States and USSR, but especially Forenia
-Tigers lol
-Nuclear power sometimes backfires, often causes cancer
-A lot of people die
-Tigers happen
-A huge dweeb falls out of an airplane
-Eventually Cannala wins, and then they betray Andres
-The leading generals from Cannala and Forenia get drunk and hook up
-Now Forenia is split back into tiger fuckers and paper nerds as separate nations
-They're occupied by Russia and Cannala respectively
-The cold war is gonna happen and it's gonna be spicy here in particular
That probably covers the important parts. Maybe.