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[Nilbert]

My fort just reached the size to have a mayor, and of course, the newly elected mayor is the one, single cruel goblin in the fort.  This has happened in many of my forts, a goblin mayor, but this one really is especially notorious.

Yes, all goblins are cruel and evil, but this one lives up to it.  Ever since she arrived, she has enjoyed randomly punching people.  Then she got moody as all she did was sit in the bar and not drink.  Punching increased, causing infections and the death of a not-so-useful dwarf.  So, I made her a wood burner.  She burnt wood for years and was seeming to really enjoy the constant work away from every one else.

But, then I finally finished building my fort and marrying off dwarf pairs and was ready for reorganization.  Miss Punchy Goblin was sent into the army.  She got good... really good... and really fast.  She really enjoyed charging with a spear and slaughtering goblins, werebeasts, really, just about anything.  She always volunteered to be at the front gate guard duty, and she always single handedly took on everything mean that showed up.  Perfect soldier!

But, well, the years of slaughtering and standing in the rain must have made her mad again.  One day, after killing a were beast, she got slightly upset... no tantrum... just the flashing yellow arrow.  Without realizing it for about half a year, she sat at the entrance and speared to death pretty much any dwarf that walked by her.  When I realized what Miss Punchy Stabstab Goblin was doing, she was happy as a clam standing in a giant pool of dwarf blood. The last of her victims was the wood burner and miller... well... I took her out of the army and put her back as a wood burner while I built her a maniacal death machine special award for her service.

Just prior to finishing up the repeating goblin-pult (a series of two bridges over a moat designed to determine how many times one can toss a goblin back and forth, you know, for science), I hit the 50 population mark and got a mayor.  Yep...  Madam Punchy Stabstab Goblin is now in charge.

In a typical situation, I would have just sped up production of the repeating goblin-pult, but there is a twist.  Madam Punchy Stabstab Goblin doesn't like anything but gold, dogs, and cockatiels (and I have plenty of gold).  That means she will never mandate anything for construction, never demand anything ridiculous, never be voted out of office, and never die a natural death!  And being familiar with McMurphy's Law, if I continue with her special award for service, the next mayor will love bismuth bronze, aluminum, catapult parts, crossbows, togas, and clear glass vials.

So, I have a conundrum and ask for your advice.  Should I continue with dwarfy justice or just consider them as unfortunate accidents beyond anyone's control?  After all, her built up jail time is still less than a decade or so (and no one really did see the Madam Mayor, with the spear, at the front gate).  Maybe I should just remove her masterpiece bed and replace it with an exceptional quality one?  She'll understand the warning, right?  Thoughts?

[ReynTheLord]

Murderous goblin mayor? Set up a "Tragic accident"

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Suicide mission

involving a "Unprovoked"

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Totally provoked

Megabeast, and a "noble battle"

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Complete anihilation of the mayor

involving the mayor's "Squad"

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The mayor and some other poor bastard who's a milita captain.

Then you'll be rid of them

[Libash_Thunderhead]

Since goblins don't die from age, you can keep him training till all skills become legendary.

My duke is also a goblin and he is actually a very nice person. The only annoying part is he keeps mandating crutches, while he doesn't like beating people to use them. 

[Thisfox]

If she's got good mandates, why not just put her in storage?
Option 1: Give her some expensive rooms with no exit but plenty of weaponry, with a way of dropping whatever nasty arrives in there with her, and drop food in there if she's ever running out. Or if you have more than one cavern,
Option 2: you could wall her into one of the caverns and leave her to have adventures on her own, or with whichever dwarf is annoying, in exile.

In other words, make her into the minotaur, rather than murdering her.

[Libash_Thunderhead]

By the way, goblins don't eat and drink. You can just lock them up.
The draw back is them can become mad in time if you don't fullfill their mandates and/or jail the workers who ignore production orders.

[Ironfang]

So you have an ageless  mayor who never needs to feed or drink. I have a brilliant idea, make a doomsday bunker for her. Fill it with dogs and gold and  make sure to meet any mandates. That way, if of unfortunate fate "happens" to tear apart the fort and scatter the bodies of the fallen across the floor like leaves on a forest trail, you still have an immortal fort.

[TheFlame52]

You have an ageless, needless, mandateless mayor, who is also a legendary warrior.

Just lock her up in her rooms and let her out when the fort is in danger of falling. Easy solution. Never worry about mandates or murders again!

[Fleeting Frames]

The yellow down arrow means your goblin is distracted by unmet needs and needs to unwind.

But I think you could already tell that.

[PatrikLundell]

It can also be mentioned that you can have the mayor appoint a replacement, so whenever a mandate spewing mayor is elected you can immediately replace it with a nice non mandater. You tend to have to do that every year, after the election, though.

[Thisfox]

Well, that's more votes for "keep" than for "kill"... Was she allowed to live?

It can also be mentioned that you can have the mayor appoint a replacement, so whenever a mandate spewing mayor is elected you can immediately replace it with a nice non mandater. You tend to have to do that every year, after the election, though.

You can, but I prefer playing with the cards I'm dealt. This keep-or-kill mentality in players is spawned from a few things, including the fact that we try to automate our fortress to function mostly without our own intervention, and also historically, from when the game was organised so that Nobles did no work, unlike now, when they work like any other dwarf. An evolved dynamic. How very.... dwarven.

So you have an ageless  mayor who never needs to feed or drink. I have a brilliant idea, make a doomsday bunker for her. Fill it with dogs and gold and  make sure to meet any mandates. That way, if of unfortunate fate "happens" to tear apart the fort and scatter the bodies of the fallen across the floor like leaves on a forest trail, you still have an immortal fort.

Make it a pyramid perhaps?

[Nilbert]

Indeed, Madam Mayor seems to be lining up to become Madam Omega Goblin.  Thank you all for the great advice and understanding of Madam Mayors, horrible, anti-social murderous checkered past.  The dwarves of Stabcaves have spoken as well and elected Madam Mayor despite her small scandals; if they can overlook these past transgressions, who are we to deny them their vote?  As the fort is at constant war with the elves and there is no access to cockatiels, a bunker full of gold and dogs it shall be.  With a gate to allow Madam Omega Goblin out for some fun now and then.  And a gold statue hall of all of Madam Omega Goblin's angry and horrible past behavior triumphs!

Officially though, the poll for suggestions has not been open for a complete 24 hours, so additional votes and suggestions may be added...  Who knows, the goblin-pult may still get some use.  Construction will start at 5:00 pm today, central standard time.

[FakerFangirl]

The only good gob is a dead gob.

[Nilbert]

Sorry FakerFangirl, seems the majority thinks solitary is the place for Madam Mayor.  Construction has begun!  Goblin-polt will have to wait...

[ReynTheLord]

Make the solitary their room
Make it a great room

Also, what weapons are they good with>

[Ironfang]

Make the solitary their room
Make it a great room

Also, what weapons are they good with>

Ones covered in blood of course.