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[AoshimaMichio]

The Lyrical Lyre man strums a few magical meters of mending in an attempt to repair not only his damaged harp, but those of his compadres.

Sorry, but fixing your instrument with bardic magic is like painting paint with paint itself.

"The Day The Bandits Wept" The Accordion-master quietly proposed as a title for the song.

"What? This is about our epic journey to kill Über Orc Lord. Bandits won't make more than first verse only, about how we magnificently beat them without paying attention."

"Uh, friend? I think they're all dead," Draignean said, or, rather, said via his cactus proxy. Draignean himself kept his bardic hood edgily low, and instead used the cactus as a sort of ventriloquist doll when speaking. The cactus had a broad smiley face painted on and a set of ye olde googly eyes adorning its front.

"BLARGH-oh, so they are. Hm."

Sit down and see if I can renovate my bagpipes with the skins of my enemies just like the highlanders of old!

You too seem to be very confused about your job description.

"Sorry Guild Master, about the song maybe make it just a few verses in a song about us traveling to kill the orc uber lord? I mean normally only the really important things get songs and I don't think this was one."

Try to fix the instruments trough the power of music

"Of course we gotta embellish it first. Or simply make it up, like 80% of epics are."

That's like trying to carry water with water.

[Ultimuh]

Blast some ancient Didgeridoo sounds for all to hear!

[ziizo]

"And so our brave heroes were intercept by the army of the feared bandit king and the hundreds of lowlifes that followed his orders, but that to our brave bards that wasn't even a speedbump armed with their precious instruments and with their fit bodies for practicing the dance of death daily our handsome heroes (because really have you ever met a bard that isn't beautiful/handsome) decimated the entire army in the same time-span a leaf takes to fall for a tree. Gah I am bad at this someone else do the song I will help with the music."

Loot the corpses maybe they have something useful

[Coolrune206]

Take out a tuning peg key and merely tune my lyre sadly.

[Poohbah]

play a heavy metal tube on my flute

[Sosoku234]

Bang the dents out of my trombone.

[crazyabe]

I Play a Tune for us to March on to.

[KiwiOui]

Play some swingy jazz to bolster morale.

[DolosusDoleus]

Ruin the collective mood with the x-files theme.

[MidnightJaguar]

Beat out a rousing marching tune to inspire confidence

[Mallos]

Join in with the marching tune via accordion

[Harry Baldman]

Pah! Job descriptions are for nonces. I am a Renaissance bagpipist through and through, and mere incompetence won't stop me from trying my best at anything I set my mind to!

[Maegil]

I show up with crossed bandoleers full with picks and two flat, strange-looking string instruments joined together, strapped behind my back and two small boxes hanging from the sides at waist level. For I'm no simple lutist, I'm an Electric Archlutist, and can play them akimbo!

"Hi there, mind if I jam with you?"
Listen a little, and start adding a basso continuo - first with one voice, then with two.

[AoshimaMichio]

Blast some ancient Didgeridoo sounds for all to hear!

3 - The sound of your didgeridoo echoes over range of few kilometers for everyone to hear. Not too loud for those close by, thankfully.

"And so our brave heroes were intercept by the army of the feared bandit king and the hundreds of lowlifes that followed his orders, but that to our brave bards that wasn't even a speedbump armed with their precious instruments and with their fit bodies for practicing the dance of death daily our handsome heroes (because really have you ever met a bard that isn't beautiful/handsome) decimated the entire army in the same time-span a leaf takes to fall for a tree. Gah I am bad at this someone else do the song I will help with the music."

Loot the corpses maybe they have something useful

"Sounds more like a tale than a song. But I like how you improved it!"

Useful?

5 - Oh would you look that, a brand new violin! Enchanted even! How did these poor excuses of highwaymen managed to get their hands on one is a mystery, but you are not one to look into mouth of a gift horse. It's even greater mystery how it survived this onslaught of bardic cacophony.

You say farewell to your old one and happily caress the new one.

Take out a tuning peg key and merely tune my lyre sadly.

4 - *sniff* "Oh, my poor lyre..."

play a heavy metal tube on my flute

5 - Despite having it damaged you play some fucking rad metal! Grass and even trees around the party turns into tungsten! Very heavy metal!

Bang the dents out of my trombone.

No banging, you'll only ruin it even further.

I Play a Tune for us to March on to.

Join in with the marching tune via accordion

Keytar and accordion together?

4&5 - It's time to march on and nobody can stop this train anymore!

Play some swingy jazz to bolster morale.

Beat out a rousing marching tune to inspire confidence

Ruin the collective mood with the x-files theme.

Next it is saxophone and marching snare drum. Opposed by theremin.

6&3 vs 4 - Epic sax guy supported by drummer pours their spirit into the rousing song matching the march melody. Together they utterly overpower theremin player's attempt to ruin mood! No mercy! Crush the enemy! No holding back! Go all out or go home!

Pah! Job descriptions are for nonces. I am a Renaissance bagpipist through and through, and mere incompetence won't stop me from trying my best at anything I set my mind to!

The train already left, howling for blood!

I show up with crossed bandoliers full with picks and two flat, strange-looking string instruments joined together, strapped behind my back and two small boxes hanging from the sides at waist level. For I'm no simple lutist, I'm an Electric Archlutist, and can play them akimbo!

"Hi there, mind if I jam with you?"
Listen a little, and start adding a basso continuo - first with one voice, then with two.

You catch up with the party just in time to join bard version of fanatic berserking.

3 - A decent addition to messy mixture of all kinds of magics.

I'm having fun!

The whole issue with adventure song writing is forgotten as the posse of foaming bards literally fly over the land, every step in air causing tremors felt wide and far. It doesn't take long before the bloodthirsty orchestra finds something to murder. An orc raiding party, somewhere along hundred and fifty orcs are mounting assault on some little village. Amongst them are two spirit summoners, already having their spirits out; a fire elemental and water king, the strongest water spirit. Those are not a big worry, but they actually have a war chanter with them, an orc equivalent of bard. Not only that, the fucker has the Death Whistle! Unique instrument, only one of its kind in the world!

Impressive, sure, but as guild master says it, "FUCK 'EM ALL, FUCK 'EM GOOD! TODAY WE EAT BACON!"

Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Shared Effects:

• Unyielding fanaticism (5's are turned into 6's)

30 Brass golems

Player: Guild Master
Instrument: Electric guitar
Effects:

Player: Harry Baldman
Instrument: Damaged bagpipes
Effects:

Player: MidnightJaguar
Instrument: Damaged Marching snare drum
Effects:

Player: Sosoku234
Instrument: Damaged Trombone
Effects:

Player: ziizo
Instrument: Enchanted Violin
Effects:

Player: Mallos
Instrument: Accordion
Effects:

Player: Poohbah
Instrument: Damaged Flute
Effects:

Player: Draignean
Instrument: Amplified Cactus
Effects:

Player: Ultimuh
Instrument: Damaged Didgeridoo
Effects:

Player: Coolrune206
Instrument: Damaged Lyre
Effects:

Player: KiwiOui
Instrument: Saxophone
Effects:

Player: crazyabe
Instrument: Keytar
Effects:

Player: DolosusDoleus
Instrument: Theremin
Effects:

Player: Maegil
Instrument: Electric Archlute
Effects:

Spoiler: The penalty box (click to show/hide)

S34N1C

[DolosusDoleus]

Crank up the volume, and produce an ear-piercing feedback loop! Make their ears BLEED!!!