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[TheBiggerFish]

Exist.

Get umbrella.

[TankKit]

Sniff for the emporer, and charge in the direction of his smell. If I correctly find him, then KILL HIM, yelling"NOONE MESSES WITH ME AND GETS AWAY WITH IT YOU SON OF A BITCH!!"

[ziizo]

new character for waitlist.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Name: Houndour
Description: A puppy Houndour pokemon, ended in the drunk dimension after trying learn flamethrower via drinking the alcohol and then trying to spit it while using ember.
Drunken element: bubbles

[Yottawhat]

"Now then, back to my favorite thing. Gambling!"

Check to see of there are any new bets.

[DoctorMcTaalik]

Poke holes in the remaining barrels with the liberated horn, and bask in the beerflow.

[crazyabe]

I look for the path to Subjectively true drunkeness and follow it.

[Harry Baldman]

To the bar!

"Lavish unto me your nourishment, strange foreigners!"

Indicate that I need a drink.

[NJW2000]

I look for the path to Subjectively true drunkeness and follow it.

Despite feeling like your head is slowly being crushed between two tree trunks, you realise that the best mode of progression for drunkenness is forwards. You go through one of the unexplored doors in the hillside, because its not like anything else was gonna happen.

The space you arrive in is very dark and quiet. The walls, tables and bar are wood and bamboo, while several woven mats are scattered around. Everything is very simply done, and the few lamps illuminating the place seem to be there just to cast shadow.

Near-silent figures are seated around the central bar and at various tables around the room. Each one is wrapped in black cloth, often covering the head and face. Many carry parcels discreetly strapped to various body parts, and you can make out more than a few scabbards of wildly varying length. Nobody seems to be playing, but there are a couple of shruikens embedded in the dart board nearby.

To the bar!

"Lavish unto me your nourishment, strange foreigners!"

Indicate that I need a drink.

You enunciate each word clearly and slowly, so the Johhny Foreigner can comprehend your request. The vibrantly tattoed chitinous lady at the bar doesn't say anything, but hands you a rounded beaker of green liquid with a transparent eyeless fish several centimetres in length swimming about in it. You interpret the way she's squinting at you as a fierce yet agreeable mark of respect among savages.

Ice crystals are starting to form in the neck of the beaker. For the first time, you notice that there is a large window set in the middle of the floor, also showing a starry sky. Your somewhat pickled brain is having trouble working out where the ground is.

Poke holes in the remaining barrels with the liberated horn, and bask in the beerflow.

[6]

You stab everything within a dozen metres, including the earth, and bask in the rich liquids that cascade out of the stab wounds. Ice-cold scotch and warm, thick blood scotch. Delicious.

(Inebriation +1)

Exist.

Get umbrella.

Certainly. Your hangover is slightly more non-euclidean than everyone else's, but I'm sure you can imagine what being beaten about the head with a four-dimensional hammer feels like.

"Now then, back to my favorite thing. Gambling!"

Check to see of there are any new bets.

You wander over the the wire cage, and gaze through at the new pair of combatants. The two previous gladiators have been replaced by a guy with a pair of bloodied shotels and an individual of indeterminate gender with the size and pugnacity of a teenage hippo. Bets over the outcome are still being placed.

A women in black jeans with a buzz-cut and skull tattoos wanders over to you. She has nearly a dozen knives strapped to various limbs.

"So you a new fighter? Pretty odd looking, even for here, if you don't mind me saying so."

Sniff for the emporer, and charge in the direction of his smell. If I correctly find him, then KILL HIM, yelling"NOONE MESSES WITH ME AND GETS AWAY WITH IT YOU SON OF A BITCH!!"

[4-1]

You lift your princely nose in the air, head throbbing from dehydration, and try to follow the smell of your enemy. Almost at once, you pick up a scent that is probably definitely the emperor, stagger after it, and worm your way past a door.

Once you go through the portal, you lose the scent completely, as frying food, beer and burning firewood assail your sensitive nose. The tavern you've wandered into is devoid of emperors, but does contain a great deal of humans in rough and varied medieaval-ish garb, a surprising number in suits of metal armour resembling onions. Most people here seem to be drunk, and your sudden appearance from thin air prompts a round of toasts, "to Catarina!"

The humans here are jovial, drinking liberally from barrels labelled, "Siegbrau", though there are no other cats to contest your dominance. This place seems pretty hospitable.

Spoiler: Inventory/Status (click to show/hide)

Prometheus the Destroyer   Inebriation: 2
Sodden pages
Wood chips
Mammal endoskeleton chunks
Mammal fibres
Mammal horn

Shelly Ton 
8 red casino chips

Name:Jerry the Puuuur-fect  HUNGOVER

Zhao Zheng  Inebriation:2
Umbrella
Erotic Novel
Norse Drinking Horn
Suspiscious foreign muck (green fish-based iced cocktail)

Alexander Kovacof Inebriation:1
Erotic novel
Flagon of scotch

Waoao Flobibble HUNGOVER
Umbrella

[TankKit]

"Grrrrrr, WHERE IS THAT SONOFABITCH EMPEROR?!" Try to find the scent of the emperor again, and scratch the crap out of him if I do find him. If not, KILL EVERYTHING UNTIL THE ANNOYING SMELLS GO AWAY!!

[Harry Baldman]

Have a taste of this icy liquid. Bite down on the fish if it should enter my mouth. Watch the stars streak along the magnificent vault of heavens.

[TheBiggerFish]

Go somewhere?

[Yottawhat]

"Yeah, I should really get into to new digs."

Place my last of chips on "Death by Bludgeoning" and check out the surrounding doors.

[NJW2000]

Go somewhere?

You sway out the door labelled South, and find yourself in a wooden bar, frontier-types scattered about the place. There's a blizzard outside and you can't see much, but you seem to be in one of the Northern bits of the fabled Wild West.

"You here to drink, or just came in for a laugh?"

The barman is staring at you. You can vaguely sense four portals other than the one you came in through.

"Yeah, I should really get into to new digs."

Place my last of chips on "Death by Bludgeoning" and check out the surrounding doors.

The bookie takes your bet. There are five portals spaced around the room, one of which you know leads to the casino. Two are what you think might be South, the others are East, North (casino) and West.

Have a taste of this icy liquid. Bite down on the fish if it should enter my mouth. Watch the stars streak along the magnificent vault of heavens.

You quaff tentatively at the stuff. This entails sipping a little, but still spilling a lot down your front. It tastes like wine made from grapefruits with a dash of engine oil, chilled and very slightly salted. The fish keeps swimming round moronically in circles, not noticing the sudden diminuition of its world. You don't notice any particular side effects.

The stars are indeed bright and wonderful. Nearby, a few things like velociraptors with scarab beetle heads start to dance, swishing their silken kimonos around while spinning in circles. A handful of other beings take up the dance, the chief attribute of which seems to be rotation.

[Self-knowledge: 1]

You could probably impress them all by joining in. You were the best dancer at court, everyone always said so.

"Grrrrrr, WHERE IS THAT SONOFABITCH EMPEROR?!" Try to find the scent of the emperor again, and scratch the crap out of him if I do find him. If not, KILL EVERYTHING UNTIL THE ANNOYING SMELLS GO AWAY!!

[6-1]

You slip angrily through a crowd of friendly people trying to pet you and follow your nose, heading North. Sure enough, there is a portal, and you leap through it to come out in a space filled with weird humanoids and other talking creatures. Your nose tells you that the emporer is in the room somewhere, but you lose track of him again as weird, overwhelming alien scents are sprayed into the air. Looking around, you can see that a few giant purple insects are communicating with sprays of chemicals, the inconsiderate bastards.

[Harry Baldman]

Let mercury stream peaceably through the air as I begin the Dance of Metal.

[crazyabe]

Now where would I Find booze...