"The First Emperor has decreed that things shall hancef-handsoff-henceforth! Henceforth they'll fall a little sideways-like! You are asked to bow-wow in respect!" Zhao Zheng declares, gesturing profusely as his mind tries to catch up to what he's saying.
And on that bombshell we vacate the premises.
You go through the door that should lead belowdecks, and immediately pass through another portal. The place you stagger into is crowded with bizarre life-forms. There are several giant blobs, all manners of multicoloured humanoids with every kind of appendage and covering imaginable, as well as some beings that simply defy description. The pyramidic room is built of white steel, with massive clear windows looking out onto the endless dark cosmos on every side. At the centre is a huge triangular bar, at which various of the weird and apparently sentient creatures are leaning, drinking, or purchasing outlandish cocktails and refreshments. The purple-shelled gorilla-woman next to you, for example, holds a martini-glass of glowing white liquid and a handful of wriggling salted almonds with tiny legs. You sense three exit portals on the walls and one in the bar.
The languages spoken are near-unintelligible, but it sounds like English pronounced by inhuman vocal cords, oddly enough. Wait, you don't speak English either, or didn't... Must just be a drunk Dimension thing.
Several maggot-men are occupied pouring beers down their throats through what looks to be an advanced space-rifle. The stuff that comes out the barrel is glowing and floats. Some things never change.
grab a few bits of glass and drop them in front of the vampire attacking you, if is a European vampire he should be forced to stop the attack and count them
[2-1]
You yank shards of glass out of your knees and drop them behind you. Sadly, most of them stay in your fingers and wrists, while the sucking sensation on your throat increases massively. Your head goes light and you fall to the ground, the bat-winged vampire still on top of you feeding greedily. Shit, the Drunk dimension really sucks.
In the last moments before your vision goes permenantly black, you hear some dry comments in a posh accent about how much cleaning up will need to be done. Wankers.
And then Allen Aries Amberg, whose name was writ in vodka, died sucked dry by a parasitic creature of the night.
Jerry listened to the guy calling himself The First Emperor, putting 2 and 2 together. Son of a bitch. Jerry turns towards him, and his fur glows bright red. "YOU STOPPED ME GETTING BOXES! DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" KILL HIM!!! (that's my action btw)
[3-1]
You throw yourself towards the portal the First Emperor just walked through, claws scrabbling desperately against the magically tilted deck, but your dehydrated and complaining muscles give in to gravity. You manage to stop yourself tumbling overboard by rolling through a portal on the side of the now deserted ship.
The room your arrive in is dark, some kind of long wooden attic full of pale people in evening wear, several of whom are dragging some shapeless bundles through a trapdoor. Everyone is drinking the same red stuff out of tall wineglasses, and holding elegant conversations. The dress code is dark, sombre and stylish.
"Nobody else planning on changing? At least Vlad dearest didn't spill any of the fresh stuff... my, my."
Nobody has noticed you.
Absorb the booze I already spilled, and then see about looting one of the mammal's horns.
[6-1]
The intoxicating mixture of scotch, warm blood and offal is just the thing to cure your hangover! A golden glow surrounds you, and you feel much better and very, very slightly less prone to homicide. You also grab a neat trophy from your conquest.
Shelly Ton tries to speak up but her non-existent tongue is also making non-existent noises. She settles for a head nod.
The bartender worldlessly hands you a tall glass of cold stuff, that apparently has bits of ginger, pepper, gin, lemon juice, cough mixture and coconut milk. You nearly retch while swigging it down and end up spilling a lot of it on the bar and floor, but a warm golden glow surrounds you and the aching in your head recedes.
Everyone around you stares for a bit, then goes back to their drinks. Eight red chips left.
"Much better, now to look for an exit"
I Say, Looking for a way out.
There are three doors in the hillside, very hobbity, one of which you just came through.
Prometheus the Destroyer Inebriation: 1
Sodden pages
Wood chips
Mammal horn
Shelly Ton
8 red casino chips
Name:Jerry the Puuuur-fect HUNGOVER
Zhao Zheng Inebriation:2
Umbrella
Erotic Novel
Norse Drinking Horn
Alexander Kovacof Inebriation:1
Erotic novel
Flagon of scotch
Waoao Flobibble HUNGOVER