So far, so good, and I like the ideas.
Xantalos: Your character seems to be taking form. What is his specific response and go-to? How does he react? Feel?
He HAS to see the
cargo to where it needs to be, somehow. He does this
by working in a team and
protecting everything from fuckin' hairy shit that might fuck their shit up.
Most of the time, combat will be against enemies more numerous and powerful than you. Your priority is getting everything there safely, not to massacre things.
The murder is incidental to the life of a Crab Trucker, if anything,
because one day they want to live in peace and dream of paradise through the Goddess and to spread her word of
being awesome and doing good shit, like getting shit where it needs to be, no matter what, never giving up, trusting your comrades and fighting bastards and crazies and evil shit through ANY fucking means necessary, even if you have to throw the truck at a monster to save the cargo.You crab should not act blindly. He should
feel and
reflect, and then
act:
THIS IS BETTER THAN "My crab did some shit cus he felt like it." FUCK OFF
Show cause and effect and you will be a great writer.
example: he sees some shit he didn't fucking like, he feels fucked off, he fucks someone up
Here are some jumping points for you:
FIRST OF ALL: Mentally unhinged psycho is a great starting point for your crab and this game. I want the narration to reflect this as well, but all the players have to have congruent narration (try for seamless RP, nothing should be or feel "out-of-place" for example). It's good if you play it up, but not if you blow it out of proportion
NAME, CHARISMA, WORLDLINESSThink about
nicknames. More than 1 is fine and good. Keep it story-focused and we'll have a good time.
EDIT: Maybe Xantaloficago can have a legend of 100 names? (or more)HIS PAST
NationalityWhat is his nationality? He is a crab of the world, and his name reflects the richness/varieties of his experiences and past.
Consider how his name suits him as a crab. I particularly like the
different mesh of cultures and whimsy. It keeps things fresh.
I like the spanish/chinese fusion for instance
(it seems he's quite an important lineage in a lot of cultures lol. Important lineage names usually take precedent over other names which are usually dropped or plain just not used. He might have lots of names, but just not use them all in his "official title or name")
One possibility is that he had some kind of job
OFF of crab mountain such as trader or bodyguard and was quite good at it. (crabs leaving crab mountain is semi-rare)
Another idea is that he frequently gets high and goes on a rampage. This is not a social thing, he is just well known/ has a reputation, for example. This also affects fighting.
Consequently, while he doesn't know a person in every scene, large settlements, popular/large bars, junkyards (whatever) probably have someone who knows him, his name (probably not the whole thing!) or know his reputation or knows someone who knows him type thing.
He is probably feared or revered. His personality seems like the kind of thing that might get the team into and out of trouble, so it's okay.
Roberto = Great first name, if a little plain. Also ethnic = good variety and flavour
'Mister Baileys' = please elaborate on the background of this!!!!
Curio de Kumquato de Xantaloficago = Good flavour, but could be shortened somehow. What is this ancestry? Elaborate. He could do shamanic drugs and be in touch with his ancestors, for example, or be a brave warrior of his caste/tribe
Al Dente Fettucine = Funny, but remember he's a crab. Good for a name nonetheless
Armageddon de Cocina = Cool
but do you absolutely need it? Everything is Armageddon in this RP.
de la Long Huang Xing Shangsheng = Like it, but shorten it! Sounds like semi-random chinese sounding syllables (dear god, please tell me you didn't do that. If it has real meaning, make it more pertinent or interesting, after all, it's a part of your character. Consider giving him kung fu or shaolin power, or ancestral chinese weaponry)
Leprás Burgonya = Not sure. Sounds cool though. Is he noble? What kind of crab is he?
Meowington Fergus = does he have cat in his ancestry or something? Is this from a different RP? Why should it be your crabs name? Consider this.
More is not better.
Condense the literal meanings perhaps by adding puns, wordplay or allusions.
THIS MAKES FOR SNAPPY RP SO EVERYONE IS EXPECTED TO NOT ADD MEANINGLESS FLUFF AND KEEP THINGS SMOOTH AS FUCK
Consider shortening posts, narration and stuff, individually, or removing redundancy
Ask yourself
1. Does it stand up to scrutiny or examination?
2, Does it add flavour to my crab?
3. Will my team-mates appreciate this?
4. What is the
Relevance to being an enormous crab?
Work together and complement your team-mates in narration and play. Have fun as a group, as well as reflecting personally.
Mostly: don't leave anyone behind. And don't forget the cargo! and don't destroy the truck! Fucking hell!
I think you have an issue of some sort NO LONGER
I can really feel/hear/see this character now! Great writing in that post, I REALLY felt it and have no doubts about your writing style AT ALL. This shit should be off the hook if you inject some !FUN! through your writing. Making all the writing styles complement and flow properly is difficult is there's no middle ground.
We should grow as people from journeying, narrating and coming up against challenges, your character(s) should too.
DRUGS, COPIOUS INGESTION THEREOFOkay, this is what I feel. Although all the crabs will drink (even gasoline) and get hella pumped up, your character should have some
specific vice or habit that he indulges in to identify him.
Maybe he does crystal meth? Dark and gritty as hell, but it works. Breaking Bad might be some inspiration, for instance.
Second, your crab has ingested a lot of drugs. This should have had a lasting effect on him, physically, mentally, psychically or physiologically.
Maybe he glows in the dark? Maybe he has dream vision (ties with heritage, see below) whatever you like, just suggest it.
Other ideas are mind altering substances like peyote or such: there is no reason the whole crew can't take a few buttons, smoke some desert weed and have a little trip, so confirm with others that
1. they feel comfortable with EXTREMELY HEAVY DRUG USE (you can find ways to tone it down, simplify it, for example fictional drugs work well)
2. if they want to do stuff with your character, such as drugs :p
Although I doubt anyone will tell you it's a bad idea, so I'll just put it out there that you need to modify this a bit, unless he has one of the following:
1. a constant mild habit, like cannabis, supplemented by harder drugs now and then is FINE
2. constantly tripping due to psychedelics is fine (sounds funny) by me, but he probably enters nightmare trances now and then during combat/duress
3. a fictional drug habit which is tied to the game. We can work this one out, but post ideas, as now, drugs will become a plot point and your crew will come across a shit tonne of gangsters who have access to some. Yep.
Frankly: a multitude of drugs (and features) weighs down the narrative. Clean it up and simplify it. If you want to invent a drug with an effect, go ahead and add it in! Your crab can be the specialist user of it, but other crabs might get to use it and have an advantage (but suffer side effects)
Taking drugs is not without repercussion. Consider this too in your character development. Maybe he's busted up somehow due to it? Emotionally or physically?
FIGHTINGKNIVES AND SWORDS
Knives? Why not swords? He could have an incan/mayan/mexican stone sword, and a chinese one. w/e works for you, if you want to incorporate this kind of thing. Does he have noble birth? How does that affect his style? Where from? Deep heritage? Yes please! But expand.
Actually, the mexican/chinese thing would work for knives too, but they'd have to be machete sized, for instance.
He can have kung fu, shaolin or some specific or fictional martial arts for example, it's all good and whatever you want.
He should sling knives/swords on his body so he can LIFT!
But you can't just swap to a pole or girder. They are heavy and need to be passed to you, for example, which might be difficult in combat.
Additionally, in heated combat, LIFTIN! using a pole or girder is not as easy FIGHTIN!
Also consider the shape and kind of weapon: huge weapons are favoured in this setting.
Think 1-foot long stilettos and flick, machetes big as a crab, etc.
Crowd control is a thing. If not, your crab can get up close and personal with lethal skill instead.
SKILLSHere's how I have Xantaloficago currently
F/L/DKarate/Knives - goes in Fight! as a specialty. What else about him? He flips out and gets violent. Okay. Describe it a little.
Lift - he's a medium lifter. So far the party is rounded out as far as lifting goes (so far)
Drive - he's poor at it. That's fine. He can get +1 in some cases so he can/should at some point have a go/relieve others.
Custom SkillsTemper - explosive, quick and likely to go off. Fast and furious. Sound fair? Maybe he gets tired or worn out by channeling his anger.
Drugs - is this really a custom skill lol? Maybe if can breathe fire or turn invisible because of it. What kind of drugs? What kind of effects? He's already OP in terms of fighting/power, so physical boosts aren't really a thing for this (much, we can add it later if we like)
Something else - he was in a monastery. Very interesting. Did he learn trances or meditation? what's his relationship with Crab Goddess like?