Finally found some time. Here's the update.
Respawn as a bunny. Rally the forest animals to fight in defense of the town
[5] You rally the animals to the town defense!
+50 town
shout hydouken and blast fire from my hands at the enemy's
[6] You shoot a HUGE fireball right at the front line, killing a group of friends and enemies alike
-10 town
-10 enemies
Kill Cthulhu and sacrifice it to The Entity! (Trust me, they're not related.)
Kill this man, before he does this.
Cancel my prior action and show this idiot just how badly he F***'d up if he tries.
Kill Cthulhu and sacrifice it to The Entity! (Trust me, they're not related.)
Kill this man, before he does this.
Cancel my prior action, and show this idiot just how badly he F***'d up if he tries.
In response, go on overwatch and wait for his move.
Sosoku rolls[4], Dustan rolls[6]
Sosoku goes on overwatch, but misses Dustan. Dustan shows him the error of his ways.
-1 town
Sosoku
RESPAWN?Pick up a cart/wagon of some kind and hurl it at Dustan Hache with all my strength.
If he is already dead/otherwise incapacitated by the creature he's attacking, uh... just throw it in the general direction of the enemy.
[3] vs (Dustans dodge roll)[2]
You graze him, breaking his arm
Discard the minigun and find another super deadly weapon. Shoot some fools./b]
[4] You get of the now empty minigun. To replace it, you go back to your revolver. You then proceed to kill fools.
-6 enemies
Is the summoned Cthulhu still wet from his time in the ocean?
If so, BURN HIM.
In any case, start BURNING WATER VAPOR, growing into a blaze that shall encompass the entire atmosphere!
[5] You set Cthulhu on fire and he dies
-1 "town" Cthulhu
Infuse some of the enemies with daemonic power.
[3] They thank you for their new daemon powers.
You know control a squad of daemon soldiers
-5 enemies
+5 town
Firebomb the enemy's tents and supply wagons while they're sleeping.
[3] you can hear their screams from miles away.
-30 enemies
Battle through to the general, pew-pewing with incendiary shells.
[1] You begin to drive towards the enemy general, but you get ammo racked by an enemy tank
-1 town
RESPAWN?Continue working to expand my drug empire. Get cthulhu hooked on crack if possible.
[4] you now have dealers within the enemy ranks, and more of them get hooked every day. Cthulhu is already dead, unfortunately, so he cannot get hooked on crack
-20 enemies
Demons, Old ones, vampires, fire water, drugs, rumor weeds - this town in an epicenter of awfulness. No wonder it's being attacked, though the attackers are bringing some of the awful with them.
Provoke the Infernal Ones to betray the attacking enemy. Raid said enemy for sacrifices for this purpose.
[2] You fail to infiltrate the camp, and so have no sacrifices with which to entice the Infernal Ones
Reveal hidden force of cavalry. Lead a charge into the enemy flank, LOTR/GOT style.
[6] You launch a massive heavy-horse charge. It crashes into the enemy flank. The sight is so gruesome, some of the more weak-willed townies lose the will to fight.
-10 town
-75 enemies
-10 town for autonomous death toll
Town:1321
Enemies:5493
The probably won't be an update tomorrow morning either. I have an exam to take