Now To Set it up... Perhaps If I just Stabbed One directly into the Broken pipe and Worked my way from there?
[4] Surprisingly, that works pretty well; you extend the system of pipes until it reaches Yoink's house. Unfortunately, you're not seeing a way to get the water inside; all the windows are closed, and Yoink didn't respond when you knocked on the door.
Use the +1 ginsu knives to butcher the neighbor's cat.
[6] Killing your neighbor's cat proves to be easy; it is already on your lawn, and its fur coat provides little protection against your Ginsu-brand knife. Butchering it is no harder—your father was a butcher, so you know some of the tricks of the trade. Explaining the situation to your neighbors, who happened to wander by as you were cutting up the cat on your front lawn, might be a fair bit trickier—they look pretty upset!
Find as much alcohol as I can in my fort.
Proceed with task "Attend party"
[4] You search your "fort" (it's just an apartment, really) for alcohol; you manage to find three bottles of booze before you get bored. You head over to a friend's party. It's, like, a party. It's exciting and stuff.
Order a pizza.
[1] You accidentally dial the local tofu chain, Tofu Hut, instead; somehow, you order twelve boxes of tofu before you realize your mistake. You
hate tofu, and you're not sure you have enough money to pay for so much of it.
Order a pizza.
+1
Woah there, partner, what do you think
you're doing? This ain't no
suggestion game—+1-ing just isn't done!
Scream like a banshee on a crack binge and attempt to escape the tub.
If successful, attempt to call an ambulance.
[4] You manage to escape the the tub. Unfortunately, you don't have a phone in your bathroom, and you're pretty much limited to a slow crawl, movement-wise, so it's going to take a while to reach one.
Start frying the potatoes
[6] You dump the sliced potatoes into the pan. As they fry, you periodically flip them with a spatula.
...It's taking
forever for them to cook! Maybe they just need some more heat? You lift the pan from the stove and dump an oilcan of gasoline on the burner; the stove immediately combusts in a massive fireball, destroying it and sending you flying backwards. You get up—and then nearly fall back down again, shocked; the wall is on fire!
Explode the potatoes in the microwave.
(I've seen this happen irl... twice)
[2] You overcook the potatoes, but they don't explode—they just turn out kind of mushy, instead. Ew.
Welcome my neighbor into my home. Offer them something to drink. If they accept, use the drink to drug them.
[1] You offer them a glass of drugs—wait, no, you meant
drinks! A glass of
drinks!
They don't buy it. In a shocking twist, they turn out to have a Black Belt in some martial art or another, and quickly drop you to the floor.
You're pretty woozy, but not quite out. You can hear them talking to the police on a cell phone.
Find another player's house, and attack them mercilessly with potatoes. Upon their death, steal their food.
[4] You break into {5} Ziizo's house. You take advantage of their distracted state—you can hardly blame them for that;
their kitchen is on fire—mercilessly pelting them with potatoes. Unfortunately, potatoes seem to make pretty poor weapons; you might've left a few bruises, but you didn't inflict any serious damage.