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Author Topic: Carnage Fiesta 1999 X Reloaded - Chapter 6: Discount Bloodbath  (Read 44626 times)

AbstractTraitorHero

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Robin is busy tipping some scales.
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((I just facepalmed so hard I have a concussion))
Rip Abigail South Death by Drop pod my avatar is now morbid.

TheBiggerFish

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EDMOEDD is in the darkest place in the mall.  Wherever that actually is.  And cackling maniacally.
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Sigtext

It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.

Sl4cker

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((so wait, what's the verdict on ultimate kars))
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Quote from: Empiricist
I mean no one wants dead whales and abortion clinics juxtaposed with each other, but it's just something that happens! Like false vacuum decay!
carrot cakeu

spümpkin

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Then Sans is good, even a 3-turn probably would have been alright considering the pace of the game.

First turn will be out in a few hours.
* i'll do that then. i was mostly just setting it really high, to be safe
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Quote from: Sergarr
When in doubt, use puns.
Quote from: Calidovi
in our own special way we are all shitpost
each day, when the sun shines and greets us with a smile, at least one of us finds that inner strength to spout bullshit on a forum revolving around the systemized slaughter of midgets
dont call me a shitposter, call me a spirit one with the shitpost atman
Quote from: Descan
that's pretty gay

Elephant Parade

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Too lazy to make a terrible OC right now. Maybe after my inevitable death.

Spoiler: Paper Mario (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 09, 2016, 11:46:55 pm by Elephant Parade »
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Sanure

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Okay, here we go. Hows it look TCM?

Spoiler: Jojo of the Dog Days. (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 21, 2016, 12:10:09 pm by Sanure »
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Quote from: Discord
Suika, Drinker of Sake - Today at 9:11 PM
"...I really don't know why Cu chulainn made that last promise because he is physically incapable of keeping it in his pants, it is like his junk is some kind of unruly seamonster or moray eel telescoping out of its holster and harpooning ladies left and right"
Johnny Jokotaru sent Kars down under

Sl4cker

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Okay, here we go. Hows it look TCM?

Spoiler: Jojo of the Dog Days. (click to show/hide)
this will be fun
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Quote from: Empiricist
I mean no one wants dead whales and abortion clinics juxtaposed with each other, but it's just something that happens! Like false vacuum decay!
carrot cakeu

Shadestyle

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Character Sheet:
Name: Cthulu Dundee
Gender: Male
Age: Immortal
Appearance: A tannish  Austrailian man, he wears a wide brimmed hat and hiking clothes, including a vest and cargo pants.
Backstory: Having trained his whole life, he brings his camera crew and his talents to the Death arena to Document the rare and exotic creatures that inhabit the area.

Abilities:
1. Grapple: Target is made immobile, if this suceeds 3 times in a row, they can no longer roll to resist and are subdued.
2. Explain: The Targets Weaknesses and Strengths are explained to the camera crew as he draws on his years of experience.
3. Track: Targets that are using a method to evade Cthulu Dundee must save or be revealed as he explains how it works and how to spot them.
4. Perfectly Safe: Cthulu Dundee can pick a target, this target will trigger a roll of Grapple, Explain, and Track if they act against him.
5. Something New Every Day: if Cthulu Dundee takes a hit, He knows just how to deal with it, removing any Status effects dealt quickly and efficiently while explaining it to the Camera Crew, he is immune afterwards to this Status effect for 3 turns.

Equipment:
1. Medical Gear
2. Backup Cameras
3. Cure-All
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You are now having excessive amounts of fun

piratejoe

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-snip-
This has to be one of the best characters in this game right now.
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Battleships Hurl insults from behind thick walls, Destroyers beat up small children, Carriers stay back in the kitchen, and Cruisers are a bunch of tryhards who pretend to be loners.

TCM

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Game 1
Location: Grand Fairbank Mall, Toronto, Canada
Chapter 0: Grand Introductions
"The revenue from this fight better be worth having to buy an entire mall." - Anonymous ArenaCorps. Representative

Grand Fairbank Mall is one of the primere shopping centers in all of Canada, providing goods that would appeal to all markets from children and families to bargain hunters and hobbyists. Well, it was anyways until ArenaCorps dropped nearly a billion Canadian dollars to buy out the entire complex and each store inside, not to mention the additional cost to pay each company's franchise. The newly formed Arena Entertainment Company believes that strong viewership will make their product a worthwhile investment, especially due to the ongoing problems plaguing other forms of international entertainment: a writer's strike in Hollywood, Netflix doubling its subscription costs, the World Cup being postponed indefinitely due to "shenanigans" and the NBA substituting out playing basketball with large men hitting each other in the testicles for an entire game. 

At the moment, the mall stands deathly silent as if it were a library or Chernobyl. Then out of nowhere an announcer's hollering voice reverberates all around the empty stores and corridors:

"LET'S GET READY! TO! FIESSSSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"

Mall Layout:

The Grand Fairbank is laid out in a general Y-shape, with three entrances/exits at each endpoint of the Y. These entry points each go through a two-story department store. The exterior of the mall is a standard parking lot, currently empty. The two diagonal lengths of this Y shape are equally long, while the bottom length, referred to as the 'Strip', is about 1.5 times the length of the diagonal sections.
The North-West Entrance goes through Ditches & Hoes, a Home Depot style store combining home improvement, construction, and as implied by the title, a wide selection of gardening and lawn maintenance equipment.
The North-East Entrance contains Beat Your Treat, which is designed as if the team behind Toys R' Us decided to expand their franchise at meeting during a cocaine orgy: the first level is 'Candyland' with all the delicious tooth-decaying treats a kid could want, while the bottom level is 'Toyworld' where children go to get everything from pellet guns so they can roleplay Soldiers vs. Terrorists, to dollhouses so they can roleplay Sleeper Terrorist Cell Infiltrates Suburbia. There is also a small indoors Ferris Wheel here.
The Southern Entrance holds C.J. Nickels, a conventional department store. The upper section features clothing and accessories while the bottom contains household appliances and furniture.
At the intersection where all the lengths of the Y meet, there is Adventureville, the mall's famous amusement park/child recreation center.
In the middle of the strip between C.J. Nickels and Adventureville you can find both the Food Court as well as the Movie Theater.
And of course, in between all of these larger places are the individual stores themselves, containing anything from electronics and sporting gear to costumes and pretzels. Finding out what and where each of these smaller stores are will require some adventuring around the mall.

At Ditches and Hoes:

Mecha Hitler busts out of one of the sheds on display. "ACHTUNG, I HAVE RETURNED!"

Hitler's outburst alerts everyone to his presence in the store, including Crusty Pete who is busy in the Paint Section chowing down a bucket of "Lemon Delight", it is not nearly as tasty as the name sounds.

One of the vents on the ceiling begins leaking blood which forms a pool on the ground. This pool of blood then takes on a human shape before solidifying and becoming the form of Rez.

Katana 'Spammer' McKatana is faintly hears a German man screaming somewhere in the store as he looks around the store, searching for new cleaning sprays for his signature weapon.

At Beat Your Treat:

At the entrance of Toyworld, a squadron of Stormtroopers kicks open the doors and spreads out among the various sections of the floor.

Sans is in Candyland carrying bags of his favorite candy, Ketchup.

Paper Mario leaps out of a gaming magazine in Toyworld.

Kyoko is eating copious amounts of candy.

At C.J. Nickels:

Kars runs inside the store, getting out of the sun-drenched parking lot as quickly as he can.

Robin is looking for a snazzy new coat.

Evil Dark Mage is downstairs looking for some EVVVILLLL desk lamps.

Johnny Jokotaru is checking himself out in the dressing room mirrors.

Spoiler: Sans (DigitalDemon) (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Mecha-Hitler (KiwiOui) (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Rez (FallacyofUrist) (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: AL-2048 (Kashyyk) (click to show/hide)

Intro turn, yeah baby. I promise that the individual character introductions are not reflective of how the actual game will be in terms of length and quality, I just had to find an excuse to get them all in the mall.
I even distributed the players among the three starting points and from now on each new/respawning character will havea  33% chance to spawn at any of the entrances.
I expect to be able to update this game daily. If you miss an update, you character will likely be injured or killed but this is a casual game and respawning is as easy as saying "Respawn".
I also forgot to spawn in my own character, oops. Will put them in next turn.
Unless there is strong opposition, I will also occasionally spawn some NPCs who are worth extra points if you can take them down, as well as some Side Quests to earn extra points.
« Last Edit: June 10, 2016, 03:50:16 am by TCM »
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Because trying to stuff Fate/Whatever's engrish and the title of a 17th century book on statecraft into Pokemon syntax tends to make the content incomprehensible.

Sl4cker

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Re: Carnage Fiesta 1999 X Reloaded - Chapter 0: Grand Introductions
« Reply #55 on: June 10, 2016, 04:10:09 am »

Kars scoffs. "This is the place where the Red Stone of Aja is hidden? Don't make me laugh."
Start looking around for that Red Stone.
Go absorb that dumb-looking guy with the pilgrim-hat that has a spiky tip. Yeah, that one.
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Quote from: Empiricist
I mean no one wants dead whales and abortion clinics juxtaposed with each other, but it's just something that happens! Like false vacuum decay!
carrot cakeu

TCM

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Re: Carnage Fiesta 1999 X Reloaded - Chapter 0: Grand Introductions
« Reply #56 on: June 10, 2016, 04:12:09 am »

Go absorb that dumb-looking guy with the pilgrim-hat that has a spiky tip. Yeah, that one.[/b]

Could you specify how? If you don't use an ability, (this applies to everyone) I'll assume you're just doing a generic attack.
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Because trying to stuff Fate/Whatever's engrish and the title of a 17th century book on statecraft into Pokemon syntax tends to make the content incomprehensible.

Sl4cker

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Re: Carnage Fiesta 1999 X Reloaded - Chapter 0: Grand Introductions
« Reply #57 on: June 10, 2016, 04:15:27 am »

((do the basic attack, then
i probably should have made his light slash his basic attack, and made absorption an attack which heals him if it's successful
can i still do that last second))
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Quote from: Empiricist
I mean no one wants dead whales and abortion clinics juxtaposed with each other, but it's just something that happens! Like false vacuum decay!
carrot cakeu

piratejoe

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Re: Carnage Fiesta 1999 X Reloaded - Chapter 0: Grand Introductions
« Reply #58 on: June 10, 2016, 04:24:26 am »

"Guess its time now. They coulda given me some more time to enjoy this stuff." says Kyoko after she finished one of the many bags of candy she nicked from the shelves. She then quickly transformed into her magical girl form and summoned her spear spinning it for a second before slamming the bottom of it into the ground with a loud slam, cracking the floor slightly. She then waited for a moment before walking off in search for witches.
« Last Edit: June 10, 2016, 04:27:26 am by piratejoe »
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Battleships Hurl insults from behind thick walls, Destroyers beat up small children, Carriers stay back in the kitchen, and Cruisers are a bunch of tryhards who pretend to be loners.

spümpkin

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Re: Carnage Fiesta 1999 X Reloaded - Chapter 0: Grand Introductions
« Reply #59 on: June 10, 2016, 05:04:57 am »

* heh. well, gotta do it sometime i guess

sans takes a shortcut, and ends up at Toyworld very quickly. he then summons some bones, throwing them at Paper Mario
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Quote from: Sergarr
When in doubt, use puns.
Quote from: Calidovi
in our own special way we are all shitpost
each day, when the sun shines and greets us with a smile, at least one of us finds that inner strength to spout bullshit on a forum revolving around the systemized slaughter of midgets
dont call me a shitposter, call me a spirit one with the shitpost atman
Quote from: Descan
that's pretty gay
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