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[Dwarf4Explosives]

I'd be interested to here it too. Incidentally, I'm in a similar situation. Should I post about it here or make a new topic?

[spümpkin]

You can take advice from here, but just for the sake of easieness, probably start your own thread. PM me, if you want .

[Romegypt]

It's your life dude, do what you want, but let me say this- Do not get any kind of surgery. Hormones and what not are fine, but do not do something irreversible that you may come to regret later. You don't know if you will feel differently 10 years from now. So for reals- Don't get surgeries done.

Again it's your choice, but I would strongly recommend against it.

[Tiruin]

It's your life dude, do what you want, but let me say this- Do not get any kind of surgery. Hormones and what not are fine, but do not do something irreversible that you may come to regret later. You don't know if you will feel differently 10 years from now. So for reals- Don't get surgeries done.

Again it's your choice, but I would strongly recommend against it.

I'd like to deeply caution delivering statements that are driven by anectodal evidence here. I'm talking about how it is worded, although the context is present.

I've promised DD a post and I'll get to it (but then Finals are in the way so a few days of wait from this time of writing) >_>
But noting ahead in regards to ALL these procedures--there is a process and a system towards going along with it. You CANNOT go through with surgery without having an informed choice about what you are doing and its implications, which when done by professionals will include interviews, consultation, and a contextual overview of YOURSELF and your experiences and nominally everything that is inclusive with your choice of proceeding. These efforts take into consideration both a professional, external viewpoint to help you make an informed choice, and your own experiences that lead you to plan out your life.

While people may 'strongly recommend against it', I'd like to make note that these statements are contextual and do not apply to specific people because they are driven by personal details--it is GOOD to note these things, but it is BETTER to note them down with detail on why you're saying so.

You don't know if you will feel differently 10 years from now.

I'll take a snippet I linked from another thread here
The best path here, in any LA thread--is to advise towards what can be done personally, physically, in reality, instead of giving the tone of conclusive advice via writing in the thread itself. Like in this quote--Guidance Counselors, Therapists, and other mental health  professionals are your best choice of who to go to in regards to meeting these kinds of queries; take for example the Guidance Counselor, a common profession which I believe is mandated to be available in every academic institution from elementary level onwards (to High school, to tertiary education...), that it has been noted ever since the 1970's that these concerns are taken into deep and personal consideration, in which advice contextually given to the person, with regard to how they are currently living and as to how they do plan to live and the context of their background are also taken into consideration.

For anyone posting in Life Advice threads, please also add details to whichever notes of caution you add. Detail is needed.

[TheBiggerFish]

I cannot add anything to what Tiruin said.

As per usual, really.

Other than, I disagree with Romegypt.  If you want to, for you, you should get the surgery.  Don't let anyone but yourself make that decision for you though.

(E:Taking Tiruin's advice.)

[Tiruin]

I cannot add anything to what Tiruin said.

As per usual, really.

Other than, I disagree with Romegypt.  If you want to, you should get the surgery.

*bop*
Details. :v
You can't go 'if you want to//if you don't want to', as these things really impact one's life. You can HOWEVER go and mention ways on how they can consider it rather than giving a conclusion. Encouragement usually is better--because if you say 'if you want to', follow it up with ways they can help get themselves informed.

Because in rare cases, there are times wherein people CAN WANT to do things, but these things are implicitly influenced by past traumatic experiences, or otherwise not-really-helpful long-term influences (eg Doing something to please someone else, or to achieve a perceived goal for other people), generally something that isn't coming from a personal need. So...caution be advised, as to how you word your advice.

[TheBiggerFish]

*is bopped*

Maybe I shouldn't be giving life advice at Too Late At Night.  :v

[Tiruin]

*is bopped*

Maybe I shouldn't be giving life advice at Too Late At Night.  :v

You can do it anytime within the day
Just do it when you're prepared.

Silly fishie
Don't tire yourself out.

[TheBiggerFish]

Silly fishie
Don't tire yourself out.

Haaaaahahahahahahahaaaaahaha.  Ha.  :u

[helmacon]

I'm just going to lay out some personal experiences here so that you can have another point of view to consider. I don't want to or mean to offend anyone with this, but if I do, I'm sorry.

I am biologically male but struggled with very strong dysphoria and questions about my gender until recently. After years of research and introspection and philosophy on the subject, I decided not to transition. At all.
My decision basically boiled down to this. Transitioning meant that I would inevitably lose any and all relationships with my family (coming from any extremely religious background), I would put myself in extreme financial stress (on average transition cost around $50,000, most of it not covered by insurance) especially as i don't have health insurance, and it would have put my life on hold for around 5 years (full length of time for HRT effects)(and that's not until you start hormones, so probably more like 7 or 8 ) assuming you are going to cut ties once your done, as you would most likely want to. I wouldn't really start my life until i was almost 30, and i would be in extreme debt then too. On top of that, there is no guarantee i would make it. I may not pass convincingly, or more likely I might die during transition. Unfortunately, a majority of people don't make it through transition, either stopping altogether due to financial issues, dieing from complication with hormone usage, or committing suicide because they were unprepared to deal with the mental stress of transition. (both internal and external).
On the other side, transexual individuals who dont transition young and are not on medication usually make it to about 40 years (add 2.5 years for every child they have) before they either have to transition from mental stress or commit suicide. While 40 years might not sound all that long, it's more than half the average lifespan (the average lifespan of a transgender individual is 23 years, with the staggering number of suicide and death) and more than enough time to live a full life if you are not occupied with transition.  When the time comes, I don't know if ill commit suicide or try to transition then. I'll cross that bridge when i come to it. This is the path I chose, and I don't regret it so far.

That above is my personal experience. However, my situation is not the same as yours (no-ones ever is) and you should not equate it as such. What you need to do first is some research.

1.
Understand your condition, so that you can be confident against those who would tell you otherwise
Read and understand this:
http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0083947

2.
Understand what your condition will entail
Read all of this:
https://tgchatroom.com/wiki/index.php/So_You_Want_To_Be_a_T-Girl_(Chapter_1)
and then read chapters 2&3

3.
Keep doing research!
Those are only a few that i still had bookmarked on my computer!
You need to read so much more!
This is not a decision to be made lightly!

4.
Keep aware of advances in science and technology. Crispr technology is huge, and we are getting scary good at manipulating and changing our bodys. This has a very real impact on how feasible transition may be.

Whatever happens, I wish you the best of luck! I hope all this works out for you one way or another. Whatever you do, be informed!

[Tiruin]

3.
Keep doing research!
Those are only a few that i still had bookmarked on my computer!
You need to read so much more!
This is not a decision to be made lightly!

That reminds me! Instead of adding this bit in my post, I should've edited it in in one of the many ones I did before ._.

I'd really forward this If in the least, for you to also spread to others. There are many sites online which have scientific works published as articles for others, with one example I used for my university studies . Always ensure that you have more sources than ONE about what details you've got, so as to see perspective and detail (especially check peer reviewed articles and such); also be aware that the understanding of GID has been dropped, and the perspective from a clinical outlook has shifted recently thanks to the DSM V.

@helma: Mind if I send you a few PMs? ._. There's a few details I see that worries me in your post...like the note of mental stress due to issues.

[Skyrunner]

Understand what your condition will entail
Read all of this:
https://tgchatroom.com/wiki/index.php/So_You_Want_To_Be_a_T-Girl_(Chapter_1)
and then read chapters 2&3

That's a terrible book, and you shouldn't believe anything in it. take everything in it with a nice teaspoon of salt each.

Relevant /r/asktransgender discussion. The book is very outdated and intends to scare you. I quote,

You are fucking around with serious mind and body altering drugs that leave permanent scars and cause irreversible effects, complications, damage, diseases, and death. Now here is where every T-girl I ever met swears up and down that they know it all.

?!?!? Today I learned that spironolactone literally causes scars, estrogen is toxin, and cyptopronene melts your liver. Get your facts from a more reputable source like /r/asktransgender on reddit, not the more outdated, previous-generation places like Susan's Place, or "so you want to be a t-girl".

he normal routine for the transition consists of three drugs; two forms of estrogen (usually Estradiol and Premarin) and one form of anti-androgen (a testosterone blocker, usually Spironolactone). These are effective drugs, they do in fact work, and they are in fact quite easy to get from the net, Mexico, or the streets. But they are quite dangerous... each of them

Estradiol: Mildly raises your chances of breast cancer. Who knew growing breasts makes you susceptible to breast cancer. Also, mildly increased chance of deep vein thrombosis.

Spironolactone: You go to the bathroom more often. so danger

Premarin: Not prescribed anymore. It's Pregnant Mare Urine. Ew.

"quite dangerous" 

Also, the insistent use of "T-girl" instead of the more generally accepted "transgender," and all the hyperbole about the drugs...


"$50000" is technically correct. But the month-by-month graph of transition fees looks more like this:



You can't really see it, but each month is $100, plus $300 for blood tests every 3 months for the first year, then for every 6 months the second and onwards. The $50000 is what you need if you opt for SRS/GRS. Thing is, it's optional. If you don't do that, two years of HRT costs $7000.


Bleh, this is a disjointed rant but I'm too lazy to make it more logical.

(tldr: screw that article)


Ps. Also, it's possible to start on HRT and then stop. One of the few things that article gets right is that hormone changes happen very very slowly. In fact, you barely have any noticeable effects until three to six months.

Edit: And no, it doesn't take 5 years. It takes 2 to 3, with the majority of changes happening between 6 and 18 months.

[Tiruin]

Understand what your condition will entail
Read all of this:
https://tgchatroom.com/wiki/index.php/So_You_Want_To_Be_a_T-Girl_(Chapter_1)
and then read chapters 2&3

That's a terrible book, and you shouldn't believe anything in it. take everything in it with a nice teaspoon of salt each.

Relevant /r/asktransgender discussion. The book is very outdated and intends to scare you[...]

Now that I've caught up reading...yeah ._. Fully agree with Sky here. The context and tone of how information is delivered isn't...

Err, Helma, have you been more exposed to a clinical perspective rather than a humanistic one? I'm wondering where you got info about exact age and years there.

[Orange Wizard]

reputable source ... reddit

lel

2.
Understand what your condition will entail
Read all of this:
https://tgchatroom.com/wiki/index.php/So_You_Want_To_Be_a_T-Girl_(Chapter_1)
and then read chapters 2&3

Wow that's really long. It's also pretty alarmist (he says, preparing an alarmist rant).

...

In any case, it is worth noting that hormone therapy in particular has a slew of health risks associated with it, including an advisory by the WHO warning of greatly increased risk of cancer.
It is also very important to remember the can of worms that is your mental health. Transgender people are at at massive risk of depression, anxiety, and suicide. The exact causes here are up for debate - activists will argue that it's because society reviles trans people, others argue that it's because messing with hormone balance in the brain is actually very damaging.

Anecdotally, gender dysphoria is also frequently a temporary condition and there have been a number of trans people admitting that they regret their decision. Not a point against so to speak, but be aware that it doesn't have to be permanent. Neuroplasticity is a thing. Your mind can be changed.

In saying all of this, I don't want to deny that some/many/most transgender people do find that transitioning will solve their problems and make them much happier. However exact numbers are hard to find, especially behind the modern narrative of trans people being so very brave for embracing mental illness who they are, in the face of apparently near-constant assault and discrimination, etc.

... I think my opinion is pretty clear. I'm going to bed before I abandon what's left of my objectivity.

Finally, even if I don't agree with the method, I do support you and hope for the best possible outcome.

[Skyrunner]

Smaller, niche subreddits are often quite reputable.