Try and sense for my mother with magic.
3. Magic tells you that she's not within radius of one hundred meters. Very concerning relevation.
<Um. Are you worried I'm going to get angry with you and do something...Rash, or something? I'd...I'd be willing to do something to assure you if I had any clue what...>
<
It is not my lord's reaction I am worried about. I have firm belief that my lord is level headed. Please do not pursue this matter any further. I'm unable to reveal anything more.> Laudata sends. No trace of falsehood there.
as a token of good will to my business partner lets bless the mine with gold and ruby's
1. Something changes inside you and breathing becomes suddenly much harder. Your abdominal muscles contract and you can't help but vomit. Out comes spray of liquid gold littered with bloody red crystals. Blood rubies. Entire entrance to your cave is covered with the mess. It's good thing you are not flying because you feel lighter than before. And sick. Another contraction is coming.
"Ah yes. I suppose discretion and all that ..."
Silence the doombox. I then ... gosh, I'm in a tight spot here - in the middle of potentially hostile territory, where magic is probably going to be sensed by the powerful, with guaranteed failures for several turns. I cast Reclose Crates, and then I cast Disguise CenTreepede as a Large Crate, and park it in an out of the way location - preferably near some other rather large crates.
"We're all going to die, buddy. But if they catch yo, be sure to go out in a blaze of glory, rampaging through the warehouse and out into the streets. Do try to minimize civilian casualties, but make it memorable, okay? if I burn up these failures and have breath left in my lungs, or gills, or spiricles, I'll be back for you. And we'll animate that dead mage, and our orange juice barrel frienemy, and we'll march properly into the next capital, rather than hiding in the fabric section. And maybe we'll do something about our new guard fish too. and a little ... oh I wonder if this place has home renovation supplies? I bet it does. We'll do some proper shopping. just ... if you hear a very large explosion, or if reality warps and you gain the ability to sing, or the urge t owear tophats, or thousands of screaming souls in place of leaves, well, something has gone wrong. You'll know what to do."
Doom box silenced.
2. Your eyes, mouth and nosetrills are forcibly closed long enough for primal fear to settle in. You spend precious minutes recovering after you can breathe and see again.
3. An illusion of large, long and partially broken crate is placed over your minion. It doesn't look like it belongs into this warehouse at all. But it is still less alarming than giant centipede statue.
Then you spend time looking for good place to park it, but fail to find one fast enough. Your minion's turn radius is too large to easily navigate this maze without knocking down anything. Front doors open and flood the warehouse with light. You are lucky enough to be in furtherst part to avoid instant detection. You can't see the people who came in, but it sounds like pair of heavily armed people. Guards on scheduled patrol? Or something worse?
((I'm sorry. RNG desires your death...))
Summon a pile of dust.
Then... hm. Give my house the ability to teleport wherever I want it to. Flight is all and very well, but there are already two flying fortresses out there. Got to make some effort at being unique.
2.
Angry red light sparks fly out of you at steady rate. Doesn't look like it's going to stop anytime soon.
5. The tower, the walls, and everything within teleports as single set to any location you desire as long as you have half decent idea of where you want to go. The spell tries to find closest unoccupied spot for your house. Failing at that, it looks for spot where least amount of matter needs to be displaced. Anything it displaces will end up in previous location of the house. Least amount of collateral damage, if you will.
You may want to do something about Calin's arm. It is starting to rot.
It was such an orderly place. Pure symmetry, perfect shape, unshakable stability. To Soleus, this place appeared like the perfect antithesis of Wild Magic.
To Soleus, it felt as if something called out for him to break this Order, to shift the scales and throw off the balance.
He said to his servants: "Don't approach, no matter what happen."
Place my right hand palm on the smooth face of the Cube. Feel the temperature of the crystal, my heartbeat echoing, my breath coming and going.
They probably wouldn't approach anyway. They too out of it.
You touch the crystal softly. It's like touching perfect barrier: perfectly smooth, unreactive, and without temperature. Then it vibrates and you hear a voice echoing in your head. Or not so much a voice than concepts and ideas that are not your own. Your mind tries hard to assign closest understood idea on those.
DESIGNATED COLLECTOR SOLEUS ARENDAR IDENTIFIED. CHAOS RECKONER ARRAY DETECTED. COLLECTION PERFORMANCE EVALUATION: UNKNOWN. NETWORK STATUS: UNAVAILABLE. LEVEL ZERO EMERGENCY PROTOCOLS IN PLACE.
...
NODE ONE ZERO IS SELF AUTHORIZED TO GRANT NEW DESIGNATION TO COLLECTOR SOLEUS ARENDAR. NEW DESIGNATION: MENDER. ACCEPT?Future Wild Magic (8): 2 1 2 5 6 6 3 3
Mind:
Knowledge of best investigator in the world
Skills of best investigator in the world
Basic spear training
Body:
Lung issues
Echantments:
Artifacts of power:
House:
Home?
Followers:
Other:
Legend of imperial investigator
Quest: Mage hunt
Distractions: 1
Future Wild Magic: 1 6 4 5 6 2 2 1 3 3
Body:
Dark green dragon
Liquid gold mine
Echantments:
Darkest shadow
Artifacts of power:
Mountain cave:
Near peak of brand new mountain
Entrance modeled as huge dragon skull
Followers:
White dragon
Other:
Rough opal
Rough emerald
Quest: Burn magic
Mining town of Lord Swellingham
Business partners
White dragon protector
Future Wild Magic (8): 2 3 1 4 5 1 5 1
Body:
Mane
Echantments:
Magical video conference between Arken Frost, Samuel Marr and Soleus Arendar
Artifacts of power:
Eye of Forbidden Sight
Flying villa:
Expanded land
Controlled by magical orbs
Holographic command room
Fully shieded with forcefield
Protects from: physical forces, repel
Unsteady small elevating platform
Servants:
Huge bearded butler: Joshua Higgs
Young pervert butler: Brian Klein
Foul mouther maid: Noel Peck
Silent statue maid: MARIE CONLEY SIR
Followers:
Magical mail order wife: Anna
Damn perfect
Golden wedding ring
Nature of self
Steel golem: Tec.
Broken wings
Electrically charged
First Commandment: Protect Anna
Second Commandment: Keep some distance, you walking tazer.
Having serious issues
Damaged arms
??
Other:
Aspiring educator
Golden wedding ring
Memories stolen
Book: Excavation of Zaaerath
Quest: Destruction of memory thiefs
In presence of Order
New job?
Future Wild Magic (8): 2 1 1 2 3 2 1 1
Body:
Pulsing light on forehead
200 papercuts
Shredded clothes
Echantments:
Protection from Giant Orange Juice Barrel
Communicate with Giant Orange Juice Barrel
Reflect Spell
Artifacts of power:
8 Seeds of defiant life
Giant wooden centipede mount: CenTreepede
The house:
Comfortable
Three stories
Kitchen:
Bit burned
Obsidian weapon field
Wheat grows through floor planks
Popping
Broken miniature pirate boat
Papercut whirlwind
Front yard:
Sucking mudfield, charmed
Iron bed (torture device)
Wooden bone throne
Two green man blocks
Flying great white shark
Frenzy
Hurt
Flying giant squid
Bloody wounded
Followers:
Other:
Scale mail pants (appearance only)
Quest: Resurrection trees for capitals
Promise of storm
Artifacts of power:
Interactive worldmap ball
So damn heavy
"Doombox"
Controlled
Mark of Green Man
Traveling crapsack
Multilegged
Charmed
Other:
Grotesque statue of dead mage
Carved poem of "Wild Magic" on pedestal
One step ladder
Mapball holder log
"Wild Magic for Dummies" pamphlet
Long drinking straw: Blocked
Future Wild Magic (11): 4 1 6 6 5 4 6 6 5 6 4
Body:
Clothes: Burned
Bandaged: Burned too
Touch of Phoenix: Flaming red hair and eyes
Hairy
Echantments:
Magical video conference between Arken Frost, Samuel Marr and Soleus Arendar
Fire breath
Sparkly
Artifacts of power:
Whispering Staff of Earth (1d4+2)
5 Balanced spell scrolls
Calin's Shredder
Heartbane
Scroll of Teleporting [5]
Scroll of Summon Weapon [6]
Tent in Tenhe:
Ward of Ignorance
Ancient tower:
Teleporting
Something is missing
Reinforced impenetrable stone dome
Hidden gate
Grid of miniature suns
Simple boulder sentinel
Five simple golems
Siege engines
Silly face carriage
Ermonous animated granite statue of Samuel Marr.
Granite statue: This is a ermonous granite statue. All craftsmanship is of the highest quality. It's encrusted with diamond, ruby, quarz and gold. On the item is an image of Calin the Crime Lord. Calin is missing arm. Calin is crying. This artwork relates to thievery of Calin's Shredder and subseguent mutilation of Calin.
Mystery plant in iron and fire cage
Ward of Ignorance: Dome undetectable to Calin and those who associate with him
The Forest: Now Ashlands
Ashlands: Two huge broken stone arms
Ashlands: Forest gone
Ashlands: 9 treasure boxes
Ashlands: Brand new tree
Ashlands: Pond of flesh
Followers:
Other:
Lots of maps
Three empty paper sheets
Owner of Calin's severed arm
Book: Autobiography of The Most Glorious King Cotlal the First
Pair of sandstone cubes
Polished steel hauberk
Quest: Terraforming path
Future Wild Magic (7): 2 2 6 2 4 2 3
Body:
White dragonish scales
Echantments:
Magical video conference between Arken Frost, Samuel Marr and Soleus Arendar
Ageless
Immortal
Shapeshifter
Telepathy
Artifacts of power:
Staff of Generic Crafting [2d3]
Slippery scrying orb
In a loose fitting copper bowl
Personal teleportation bracelet
Grand Kinetic ring (3)
The Fortress:
Flying
Reconstructed many times
Skeletons in closet
Precision mining beam
Folds space at whim
Telepathy
Architecture is:
Impressive
Luxurious
Intelligent
Self-replenishing
Self-modifying
Overtly helpful
Throne room
Ornate skylight
Mage's workshop
Self-replenishing
Containment circle
Dispel array
Forge
Inhabitants: 20
New species
Not so polite
Personal teleportation bracelets
Monster army
Tied to fortress's power
Chrome shelled
Followers:
Laudata
Other:
Quest for godhood: In progress
Quest: World war
Small Favours
Glimpse of magic
Big pile of loaded dice
Other:
Damn hot
Firstborn of new species
Minor arachnophobia
Artifacts of power:
Personal teleportation bracelet
Kinetic ring
Echantments:
Shapeshifter
Strategic genius
Telepathy
Followers:
5 giant demon wolf golems
Army