Soleus is making a deadpan face. Sigh. He should have expected something from that horribly tasteful lie of a cake.
"Look like we got a weed problem. Brian and Noel, try to find an axe or something for Joshua to cut the tree. Marie, you will keep an eye on Tec while he slows the tree growth. Don't worry he is a housegolem. I will introduce it to you later.
Oh, and to all of you. Don't ever approach the cake lying around. Don't even look at it. It's a magical artifact of doom, we will take care of it later."
Send Brian and Noel to find an axe or big enough sharp object to cut the tree.
Order Tec to rip branches off and throw them overboard, with Marie supervising him.
Cast a spell to analyze the Tree species.
"Understood." Brian leaves immediately to perform the given task and Noel follows lazily. Tec walks to edge of your island and jumps off. Marie does likewise, but stops on the edge. She stares down few seconds and then turns to you.
"I will need weapons, sir!"
Joshua walks next to her, gives one glance what's down below and agrees. "More likely we need fire. Lot's of fire."
2. The spell gives you only image of great shadow in clouds.
Deciding you need to see what they are so worried about you too walk next to them and take a loog. What you see is... pure chaos in form of flesh. The approximate area where Tec sent the cake flying and where the tree is growing is literal sea of twitching flesh. Or a pond of flesh, same difference. Legs, hooves, claws, arms, tails, heads, torsos and internal organs of all kinds of animals, all growing from each other. Scales, fur, slimy skin and feathers all happily mixed together with some plant life that you have never seen before and some you have. Morose wailing and whining rises from the pile as Tec walks over it to the huge tree in middle. The tree itself has rather wide trunk, easily six meters in diameter. Most of branches are high up on top where they form a kind cap over the tree.
Tec reaches the tree stabs his steel fingers and toes deep on its bark and starts climbing up. Brian returns with a simple axe, looks over what you are seeing, looks the axe on his hand and promptly throws it over his shoulder. "Yeah, I don't think axe is what we need here. Maybe fly away and deny everything?"
"I don't think we should disturb them."
"Anyway. Laudata, how would you like to go down in history as the mother of a new species?"
"All right. You know where to find them if you need them later." Animated statue returns to its place by wall and freezes there.
"Mother of...? Ah, what kind of motherhood your lordship is implying?"
"I see. Another demented minion dedicated to my harm. Ah, if only I'd been content with summoning breakfast, I wold be settled in nicely, examning the broken bits of brain floating about the head of my statue of a deceased mage, rather than trying to placate all my tools and keep them from incessantly trying to kill me. Perhaps, though, it is as nature intended. Wild Mages are not built to last, it seems. And for good cause, if the legends are true.
Alright, what have I got? A three. Good enough."
I cast Quieten Doom Box on the doom box.
"And I think i will save these next two good rolls for when I have a better idea of my situation here. Perhaps i should just return to my camp, along with my new items. And maybe even the corpses of my erstwhile tormentors. Bloody imps. God, I shold really stop talking to myself."
3. Doombox tones it down to more tolerable level, though you still would be happier with less volume. This level of noise won't pop your eardrums, but prolonged exposure still may damage your hearing.
That very big floating thing by mountain? It is now firing some sort of beam down.
"Hmm I wonder if there are any other wizards?
Search for wizards! also try and find a suitable home
It's not matter of "if", but more of "where". I assume those are both spells, because that's more fun way to interpret it.
((Story time, bear with the wall of text.))
1. A memory (not yours) comes into mind and completely takes over as you live it over. You are huddled together with few others, hands tied behind your back with very roughly made rope. A rope you made yourself. You were lucky to find this group of people, almost everyone had learned ways to rebuilt primitive tools back in days when everything was still normal. A hobby turned into invaluable skill. They teached you the skills as so you wouldn't be as useless. In these days every skilled hand is valuable its weight in gold. Though gold actually very useless currently. Proper steel is far more valuable, because it so much more better cutting things and because almost all of it dissappeared with rest of the civilization. Bad example.
And why you are in robes again? Well, that's because this less skill oriented group of fuckers came and decided they would take everything your group had made and turn you into slaves. Thugs, criminals or stupid industrial workers who survived by some freak luck. Now the idea of losing all your hard work for those bastards wasn't exactly the most attractive one, so you fought back. And lost. Badly. It's brawns over brains in this world now. So they tied you up with rope you made. And now they are breaking fingers of others. Torturing your friends. This makes you angry. And desperate, because you know you are more expendable than others. You will be made an example as soon as they figure that bit out.
You need to get free. And kill them. But how? Answer comes in form of mental poke. "You want power? Here, have some. But be careful with it." You sense how the rope begins to soften and spread down on your palms, coating your fingers with soft and cool material. It takes few moments for you to realize that you aren't bound any more, and you are wearing nice gloves. How's that even possible? But you know the answer: magic. It's a funny though, all good stuff disappears, millions of people die and suddenly you can do magic. Well, signs were in the air, you can now see it. But back to the problem number two. How to kill these fuckers. Now you have power to do so in any manner you can imagine. You have power to do whatever you imagine! The thought makes you chuckle. Chuckle turns into manic laugh and you stand up.
The invaders are looking you now. They look bewildered, then angry. They shout at you, but you don't hear it. Why should you care what they speak. Ah, that guy breaking fingers, he will make fine example. How about... ripping his arms off? Sounds cool and suitable. For sake of theatrics you whip your arms wide open as you send your will and desire into the new thing in your mind, to magic. And it responds to your will, excited to flex its muscles for first time. It does fullfill your request in extravagant manner, fully and completely tearing him in half, sending spray of blood and gibblets into air. You know this should disgust you, but you feel rather detached. It feels unreal.
You hear words coming out of your mouth. Words of burning revenge. Another request to magic and another man bursts into flames. You laugh. And laugh. A wicked idea comes into mind. These poorly educated types tend to be rather speciests, always hating elves, dwarves and other animal people. Why not turn one of them into a real animal, slowly so he can fully appreciate his fate? Sounds like a lot of fun! Makes also hunting less problematic! Command goes off, and one of the invaders starts slowly transforming into a cow. Udders and all. Hah, serves his right! Bastard was probably sexist too. Rest of invaders seem to finally realize they are about to have bad time and turn to run away. Hah, as if that would help them!
Next, let's try something different. You send order to generate swords to impale runners with. Nothing happens. Why? WHY? You have the power! Why would it suddenly stop working? Again the answer comes quickly, this time in form of scream from your friends. You turn to look and see that one of your group members is being impaled by steel spikes growing from inside of her. "Whoops, that was not supposed to happen. Don't worry, I can fix this!"
1. You cast spell to heal your comrade. Wait, comrade? That was a vision, wasn't it? Vision already ended, was the healing spell part of the vision? Nope, it wasn't. Plants and trees aroung you start blackening rapidly, each one dying and rotting off. Very soon all life within fifty meters has been completely eradicated out of existance. Only you and your naked companion are left standing in field of death.
"Whoops" is not the way how you would put this.
Future Wild Magic (9): 1 2 3 1 6 1 6 3 1
Body:
Echantments:
Aura of strength
Magiphone with mommy
Artifacts of power:
Locket of Subjective Truth
House:
Followers:
Other:
-Basic travel gear
-Woodcutters axe
-Two big kithcen knives
-Some food
Some jewelry
Dressed for party
In coastal city
Cover story provided
Escort of Eleanora Beaumann
Party
Legend of imperial investigator
Future Wild Magic: 2 2 2 3 3 5 4 4 5 4
Body:
Echantments:
Artifacts of power:
House:
Followers:
Scaled man
Soulless
Other:
Dead forest
Future Wild Magic (8): 6 5 2 2 4 1 2 3
Body:
Muddy
Mane
Echantments:
Magical video conference between Arken Frost, Samuel Marr and Soleus Arendar
Artifacts of power:
Eye of Forbidden Sight
The Cake
Flying villa:
Expanded land
Controlled by magical orbs
Holographic command room
Fully shieded with forcefield
Protects from: physical forces, repel
Unsteady small elevating platform
Servants:
Huge bearded butler: Joshua Higgs
Young pervert butler: Brian Klein
Foul mouther maid: Noel Peck
Silent statue maid: MARIE CONLEY SIR
Followers:
Magical mail order wife: Anna
Damn perfect
Golden wedding ring
Traces of violence on throat
Nature of self
Steel golem: Tec.
Skeletal structure
Left wing transformed
Fleshy right arm of ape
First Commandment: Protect Anna
Other:
Aspiring educator
Golden wedding ring
Memories stolen
Book: Excavation of Zaaerath
Future Wild Magic (9): 6 4 2 4 1 3 5 2 6
Body:
Long ears with tuft
Echantments:
Protection from Giant Orange Juice Barrel
Communicate with Giant Orange Juice Barrel
Reflect Spell
Limited Extrasensory Awareness of Change
Artifacts of power:
"Doombox": Rather loud.
The camp:
Food reserves: sausages and cinnamon rolls
Grotesque statue of dead mage
Carved poem of "Wild Magic"
Wooden bone throne
Bejeweled golden goblet
One step ladder
Followers:
Other:
Long drinking straw: Blocked
Scale mail pants (appearance only)
"Wild Magic for Dummies" pamphlet
"Iron bed"
Future Wild Magic (11): 6 3 6 1 4 1 1 2 2 5 4
Body:
Sand in pants
Coated in blood and ink
Something lost
Eyebrows and hair burned off
ON FIRE
Echantments:
Magical video conference between Arken Frost, Samuel Marr and Soleus Arendar
Artifacts of power:
Whispering Staff of Earth (1d4+2)
5 Balanced spell scrolls
Calin's Shredder
Heartbane
Scroll of Healing [6]
Scroll of Teleporting [5]
Scroll of Summon Weapon [6]
Potion of Firebreath [6]
Tent in Tenhe:
Ward of Ignorance
Ancient tower:
Something's missing
Reinforced impenetrable stone dome
Hidden gate
Grid of miniature suns
Simple boulder sentinel
Five simple golems
Siege engines
Silly face carriage
Ermonous animated granite statue of Samuel Marr
Granite statue: This is a ermonous granite statue. All craftsmanship is of the highest quality. It's encrusted with diamond, ruby, quarz and gold. On the item is an image of Calin the Crime Lord. Calin is missing arm. Calin is crying. This artwork relates to thievery of Calin's Shredder and subseguent mutilation of Calin.
Mystery plant in iron and fire cage
Ward of Ignorance: Dome undetectable to Calin and those who associate with him
The Forest: Now Ashlands
Ashlands: Two huge broken stone arms
Ashlands: Forest gone
Ashlands: 9 treasure boxes
Ashlands: Brand new tree
Ashlands: Pond of flesh
Followers:
Other:
Lots of maps
Three empty paper sheets
Owner of Calin's severed arm
Book: Autobiography of The Most Glorious King Cotlal the First
Pair of sandstone cubes
Future Wild Magic (8): 6 6 3 3 5 3 6 3
Body:
Bitten by feather hat
Scales on back of hands
Echantments:
Magical video conference between Arken Frost, Samuel Marr and Soleus Arendar
Ageless
Immortal
Artifacts of power:
Staff of Generic Crafting [2d3]
Slippery scrying orb
In a loose fitting copper bowl
Personal teleportation bracelet
The Fortress:
Flying
Reconstructed
Skeletons in closet
Precision mining beam
Intelligent
Self-replenishing
Self-modifying
Overtly helpful
Gargoyle avatar
Throne room
Ornate skylight
Inhabitants: 20
New species
Not so polite
Personal teleportation bracelets
Mage's workshop
Self-replenishing
Containment circle
Dispel array
Followers:
New species: Laudata
Firstborn
Minor arachnophobia
5 giant demon wolf golems
Personal teleportation bracelet
Swarm of stone spider golems
Other:
Well prepared for travel
Quest for godhood: In progress
Small Favours
Glimpse of magic
Pair of lead chunks
Funny wooden wheel
Perfectly generic ladle
Author
Topic: Wild Mages: Dominic, The Naked Mage (Read 87742 times)