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[Elephant Parade]

YOU ARE MARCHING BAND.

IT IS BIG PERFORMANCE ON MAIN STREET...

...BUT PEOPLE ARE NOT PAYING VERY MUCH ATTENTION!

YOU ARE NOT DRAWING THE EYE (OR EAR)

YOU JUST AREN'T VERY EXCITING!

TO LIVEN UP THE PERFORMANCE, YOU MUST DO SOMETHING.

BUT WHAT WILL YOU DO?

[Salsacookies]

Become Russian. MARCH BAND ON PEOPLE!

[Ardent Debater]

Use Slightly Illegal Fireworks! ON THE CROWD!

[crazyabe]

Unleash, THE BROWN NOTE

[Elephant Parade]

Become Russian. MARCH BAND ON PEOPLE!

[1] YOU TRY TO LEAD THE BAND INTO THE CROWD, BUT NOBODY FOLLOWS YOU

YOU END UP JUST AWKWARDLY JOSTLING A FEW PEOPLE NEAR THE EDGES

Use Slightly Illegal Fireworks! ON THE CROWD!

[3]FOR A MOMENT, IT LOOKS LIKE YOUR FIREWORKS ARE GOING TO SPIRAL INTO THE CROWD, BUT THEY PETER OUT AND HIT THE GROUND FIRST

Unleash, THE BROWN NOTE

[5]EW


CROWD EXCITEMENT: ALL-TIME LOW
EVENT LEGALITY: HIGHLY QUESTIONABLE

[Sosoku234]

Play some peppy music.

[Sl4cker]

Don't play music. This'll grab attention for sure.

[crazyabe]

Handout Assault rifles and Uzis to Any Children or Teens that might be Watching us, That will always get attention!!

[Elephant Parade]

Play some peppy music.

[3] YOU DO, BUT IT'S REALLY GENERIC

IT'S BETTER THAN NO MUSIC, PROBABLY, BUT IT'S HONESTLY PRETTY BLAND

Don't play music. This'll grab attention for sure.

[1] EVERYONE AGREES THAT SILENCE IS THE WAY TO GO, AND JOINS YOU

IN FACT, THEY DECIDE TO BECOME MIMES

(MIMES AREN'T VERY EXCITING)

Handout Assault rifles and Uzis to Any Children or Teens that might be Watching us, That will always get attention!!

[6] THE RESULTANT MURDERS MADE UP FOR THE MIMES, EXCITEMENT-WISE, BUT WAS IT WORTH THE COST?

(HINT: NO)

EXCITEMETER
[---------|--------]
(A BIT BETTER THAN TELEVISION)


LEGALMETER
[--!---------------]
(POLICE INCOMING)

[Sl4cker]

Everyone knows mimes are completely and implicitly harmless. Give all the guns to the mimes, thus effectively hiding them.

[crazyabe]

I try to Call in a few favors to get the band "Iron Maiden" to Show up.

[Sosoku234]

Load artillery shells into the tubas. Fire upon the police with bright colorful, high explosive fireworks.

[Xantalos]

Begin the 1812 Overture, only with cannons.

[TinFoilTopHat]

Begin the 1812 Overture, only with cannons intense gunfire aimed towards police officers and anyone else who doesn't like these sick beats.

1

[Elephant Parade]

Everyone knows mimes are completely and implicitly harmless. Give all the guns to the mimes, thus effectively hiding them.

[3] SOME OF THE TEENAGERS REFUSE TO HAND BACK THE GUNS, INSTEAD OPTING TO GESTURE THREATENINGLY AT YOU

UNFORTUNATE CONSEQUENCE: SEVERAL MIMES GO UNARMED, AND ARE THUS FORCED TO WIELD INVISIBLE WEAPONS

THIS ACT REMINDS EVERYONE THAT THEY'RE MIMES, AND THUS DULL AS DIRT; SEVERAL FAMILIES GET BORED AND LEAVE

I try to Call in a few favors to get the band "Iron Maiden" to Show up.

[3] YOUR FAVOURS WERE PRETTY MINOR, SO YOU GET AN OBSCURE GARAGE BAND THAT ONCE PLAYED AN IRON MAIDEN COVER

Load artillery shells into the tubas. Fire upon the police with bright colorful, high explosive fireworks.

[6] THE POLICE AREN'T HERE YET, BUT YOU WON'T LET THAT STOP YOU FROM WAGING WAR; IT'S CALLED "ARTILLERY" FOR A REASON

(THE REASON BEING THAT YOU CAN USE IT TO DESTROY YOUR ENEMIES FROM A DISTANCE, AS YOU DID TO EVERY SINGLE POLICE CAR)

Begin the 1812 Overture, only with cannons.

[6] YOU KILL HALF THE CROWD

BUT THEN THE PARTIALLY-ARMED CROWD KILLS HALF THE BAND

NOBODY IS HAPPY ABOUT THE HALVING

EXCITEMETER
[-------------|----]
(CURRENTLY ON TELEVISION)


LEGALMETER
[-!----------------]
(SWAT TEAM INCOMING)

CROWDMETER
[------|------------]
(THINNING OUT)

BANDMETER
[---------|---------]
(STILL MARCHING)