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Author Topic: ROLL TO TEST RUN  (Read 3415 times)

lawastooshort

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ROLL TO TEST RUN
« on: March 02, 2016, 06:09:16 am »

ROLL TO TEST RUN

Like a GM who hasn’t GMed in some time, this GM wants to GM. But can he or she still GM? Or find the time to GM? Or the inspiration to GM? Or the motivation to GM?

This is a quest to find out.

Your mission: to successfully play in a test run.

CHAPTER ONE: JOIN THE GAME.
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Nakéen

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #1 on: March 02, 2016, 06:15:45 am »

A sentient toast animated by some unknown force joins the game. She jumps off the table she is currently on.
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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #2 on: March 02, 2016, 06:17:54 am »

Mash buttons until I get food
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lawastooshort

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #3 on: March 02, 2016, 06:34:35 am »

1

A sentient toast animated by some unknown force joins the game. She jumps off the table she is currently on.

In a morale boosting turn of events Nakéen rolls a [1], falling off the table they unwisely mounted and face first into the nearby open fire whilst screaming (mistakenly) about being a slice of toast.

NEW STAT UNLOCKED: NAME!

NEW STAT UNLOCKED: BURNING!

Name: Nakéen
Burning: Yes

Mash buttons until I get food

In an even boostinger turn of events, Roc CURIOUSBEAST_EATER rolls another [1] and smashes his or her fist straight through their monitor whilst trying to mash buttons. A shard of glass makes him or her bleed HARD. Since the text on the screen is now unreadable, it’s unknown if Roc CURIOUSBEAST_EATER knows he or she is bleeding HARD.

NEW STAT UNLOCKED: WOUNDED!

Name: Roc CURIOUSBEAST_EATER
Burning: No
Wounded: Yes
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Nakéen

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #4 on: March 02, 2016, 06:41:56 am »

"Please, my name is Liz !" shouts the hot feminine toast -or is it a toast ?-.
Jump into the nearby toilet to extinguish the fire
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TheBiggerFish

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #5 on: March 02, 2016, 06:55:42 am »

Exist.
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Sigtext

It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.

lawastooshort

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #6 on: March 02, 2016, 07:06:22 am »

2

"Please, my name is Liz !" shouts the hot feminine toast -or is it a toast ?-.
Jump into the nearby toilet to extinguish the fire


[5] Displaying ever greater levels of delusion, Nakéen crawls from the fireplace and then jumps – quite acrobatically – into the nearby toilet to extinguish the fire. Which was on his face. This face is now firmly in the toilet. As she starts drowning, Nakéen wonders why there was a toilet in the living room with the fireplace.

Name: Nakéen
Burning: No
Wounded: No

Exist.

[3] Well, thinks TheBiggerFish. I am. I think? Therefore? Maybe?

At least he or she is suddenly aware of two things she or he certainly is not:

Name: TheBiggerFish
Burning: No
Wounded: No
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TheBiggerFish

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #7 on: March 02, 2016, 07:26:32 am »

Ponder status more.
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Sigtext

It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.

Salsacookies

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #8 on: March 02, 2016, 07:31:42 am »

PRAISE THE CHUNKS!!!
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Yep, the sig is here
Whoops. Well, shit. Typical salsacookies.
I don't need my cavities checked. I just went to the dentist! Ba-dum-tiss.
I am a Christian

Yoink

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #9 on: March 02, 2016, 07:34:23 am »

Shout a long string of unintelligible Irish curses into empty space whilst shaking a (possibly nonexistent?) fist.
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Booze is Life for Yoink

To deprive him of Drink is to steal divinity from God.
you need to reconsider your life
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

lawastooshort

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #10 on: March 02, 2016, 08:36:11 am »

3

Ponder status more.

[6] So. You might exist. You might think. You might think you might exist. You do think that the only real way to tell is to take a closer look, so you remove all your clothing and stand in front of the full length mirror to your right. You think that you see you, and realise an uncomfortable truth about your status.

NEW STAT UNLOCKED: NAKED!

Name: TheBiggerFish?
Burning: No
Naked: Yes
Wounded: No

PRAISE THE CHUNKS!!!

[6] You want to praise some chunks, but you’re not sure what kind of chunks. Fresh chunks? Fish chunks? Flash chunks? Flish chunks? Aha! Flesh chunks! Probably. You slice off your left leg at the knee and chop it into chunks, or at least start to chop it into chunks, until you interrupt yourself by passing out from blood loss. Or pain. You’re unconscious, so you have difficulty telling which.

NEW STAT UNLOCKED: MAIMED!

Name: Salsacookies
Burning: No
Naked: No
Wounded: Yes
Maimed: Yes

Shout a long string of unintelligible Irish curses into empty space whilst shaking a (possibly nonexistent?) fist.

[5] You think you shout something extremely similar to the words feck fecking fecker of a fecking eejit, you fecking feck fecker! at that fecking eejit of an empty space just in front of you, but you can’t really tell – you’re completely unintelligible, even to yourself. The life of a priest is long and arduous. And not made any easier by drinking heavily from 7am onwards, no matter what you tell yourself. Wait, is that your fist? It looks puzzlingly non-existent.

Name: Yoink
Burning: No
Naked: No
Wounded: No
Maimed: No
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Nakéen

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #11 on: March 02, 2016, 02:07:29 pm »

Take head off toilet and go see my psychologist. I'm late !
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Salsacookies

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #12 on: March 02, 2016, 02:57:38 pm »

I am the chunky Martyr! Pray my sacrifice pleased the Chunks!
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Yep, the sig is here
Whoops. Well, shit. Typical salsacookies.
I don't need my cavities checked. I just went to the dentist! Ba-dum-tiss.
I am a Christian
Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #13 on: March 02, 2016, 04:03:50 pm »

Go to a doctor to cure my bleeding
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TheBiggerFish

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Re: ROLL TO TEST RUN
« Reply #14 on: March 02, 2016, 06:21:02 pm »

Put clothes back on, eww.
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Sigtext

It has been determined that Trump is an average unladen swallow travelling northbound at his maximum sustainable speed of -3 Obama-cubits per second in the middle of a class 3 hurricane.
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