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[Jopax]

So I've got this problem you see, I'm not sure when it started but I also don't remember a time where I wasn't like this. That is, lacking mostly any sort of self control when it comes to almost anything. So there's rarely if ever any middle ground in almost anything I do, I'll either eat the whole damn chocolate or not have any of it (because I know I'd eat the whole damn thing if given the chance).
And this is despite attempts in recent times to get this shit under control, I'll decide upon a thing (like say, eat only a bit of chocolate) but by the time the decision to follow up on what I set out comes I just kinda roll over it without giving any regard to what I decided earliel.
Now, for the most part I always brushed this issue aside, but in the last year or so, certain things happened that kinda brought it right into my face where it's impossible to ignore it as one of the key sources of most of my problems. (and funnily enough, a certain episode of South Park kinda made me start thinking about it real hard) Now, I've tried bringing this stuff under control somehow, but my approach so far of just brute forcing myself into compliance was met with mixed results. Certain things have improved but for the most part, it's still the same.
So I'm at wits end here, and I don't think I have any other option but to finally ask someone, anyone, for help. Do you people have any expirience with this, any advice on what I could be doing to try and fix this part of myself that's brought me stupid amounts of both pain and trouble.

[LordBucket]

any advice

I suggest being self aware in the now, and not being so preoccupied with what 'future you' and 'past you' is/was thinking and doing. Committing now to do something later isn't necessarily wise if you're simply pushing off what could be done now. If you don't want to do the thing now, and you're simply pushing it off to do it later...remember in the now that when you're you in the future, you still won't want to do it then either.

At the same time, looking back at the past and honoring a commitment that "somebody else" made in your past isn't always a good thing either. It doesn't honor you in the now to be living the life decided by you in the past. You right now aren't the one who decided to delay the thing you didn't want to do, and thereby left you stuck with it now.

i advise not worrying so much with past and future selves. Focus on right now. That thing that you don't want to do? You can do it right now. That thing that you choose to not do, like eating only so many cookies? That's your past self making that decision. You right now are deciding in every moment whether to take that bite right now. That thing that you committed to doing or not doing later? It wasn't 'you right now' who made that commitment. It was a past self that dumped it on you. Your commitment to eat only so many cookies? Why are you deciding now that your future self will stop eating more cookies, when you can decide right now to not eat cookies?

So stop dumping on your future self and stop focusing on what your past self dumped on you.

Focus on right now.

[i2amroy]

Self-awareness, reminders, and practice are honestly the only real ways to improve your self control. In general try to start small and work your way up from that. Try starting with something small and managing the temptation (Note: Don't fall into the trap of "rewarding yourself" for waiting a specific period with the thing that you were waiting for. While this is a good first step if you absolutely have no self control, it really can slow down the earlier stages).

It might also be worth noting that there's two different kinds of self-control, that of holding yourself back from doing things, and that of holding yourself to things you need to do. In both cases practice is the real answer, start small and just practice more at self control. In cases of holding yourself back it can help to take steps to avoiding the temptation completely in addition to practice, i.e. when you grab that chocolate bar or cookies out of the cabinet don't grab the whole box, grab one cookie or open the bar, break it in half, and put half of it back. In cases where the self control is the self control to not procrastinate than reminder notes on your desktop/etc. can go a long way towards getting you to do what you need to.

In both cases the key is going to be focused practice. Pick something small and hold yourself to that line without a single exception for at least a month so the habit is established (Generally the two week mark is the hardest to get over; if you make it that far without any exception then you are usually in pretty good shape, but the longer you can go without breaking the habit the better). If you fail pick something smaller and try again, if you succeed then pick something just slightly larger and work on getting that habit established as well. Keep up the practice and eventually you will get better at it.

[Shadowlord]

Personally I've had to just never* buy junk food. It's a lot easier to not buy it than it is to not eat it once I have it.

* occasionally I have failed

[Djohaal]

If you are willing to try medications there are a few drugs that reduce impulsiveness and help people to manage such behavior. One such example is topiramate, an anticonvulsivant which has strong anti-impulsive and even appetite supressant properties. Biggest issue is its side effect profile isn't so hot and about one third to half of patients that try it experience important cognitive impairment while using it (the other portion don't seem to suffer anything, probably some genetic/constitutional factor we haven't discovered yet), alongside some other effects such as headache and nausea. Its usage in patients with mood disorders is also somewhat difficult.

But again the mantra in every single psychiatric advice I hand out in this forum holds, ideally you want to find a good professional, understand your symptoms and discuss your options so you can figure out what is best for you, be it a medication route or psychotherapy, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy as an example.

[Jopax]

Ok, first off, food isn't an issue, it was an example X)
And I've gotten the sugar intake under control for the most part, which was one of my concerns earlier. Hell, if anything, I should probably be eating more considering my weight, but that's another issue, mostly unrelated to this one.
Medication is not something I'd like to do, mostly because I'm incredibly averse to any kind of medication for anything unless absolutely neccessary, and I'm not sure how I feel about going to someone about this, mental health is a bit odd in these parts, and for the most part not something talked about or treated properly. Still, while I've had my doubts and everything they're still doubts and I don't want to go and get my head picked apart based on not being sure :S
Finally, thanks for the advice guys, I'll try and focus on the now for the most part (since that's what I've kinda felt myself to be an issue, namely that I live either in the past or the future, rarely the present, something to work on I guess). The habit building thing is also good but doesn't always give results, or rather, I don't often stick trough with it. Guess I'll have to start smaller this time X)

[Antsan]

I am dealing with addictive behavior, too.
What works best for me is total avoidance. If that is an option: Go for it!

What also works is to exercise patience. To take the example of excessive chocolate consumption: Take the chocolate bar, break off one piece, rewrap the chocolate bar, put it away, consciously taste the piece instead of scarfing it down.
Of course that's only a first step.

[Salmeuk]

Your mind has probably associated certain settings with certain activities. One thing that helps put me in a different mindset (a mindset not dominated by compulsivities) is to rearrange my furniture. This is a PITA for some people, but I like to do it every few months. This is a minor change of setting, you can also try moving your residence. Dramatic but veeeery effective in forcing you to adopt healthier patterns. Easier if you're a turtle, but I've never met a turtle who could type so you'll have to do it the hard way.

Confiding in someone close to you can also help solidify that feeling of "Moving On." But this is not always applicable, since addiction can be embarrassing (despite the fact that everyone faces it in one way or another).