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[Loud Whispers]

Alcohol is a pretty nasty one. One of my friends, she works as a counselor, specialising in all sorts of addictions. She said the most reliable indicator of alcohlism is just "are you able to have just one." Or does one drink always lead to another, and another. Especially since one drink impairs the judgement and cognitive functions, lowering the inhibition to having another. Probably better to just forgo drinking altogether if it is calling to you. Even if you can just have one, you don't need to prove to yourself anything at the cost of your health and happiness. Alcohol is a toxic depressant, if you feel morally conflicted or self-esteem is damaged with it, feel like you're drinking it for a compulsion not a reason, get a nice long break just so you can have a proper frame of reference.

I remember I used to work at a bar, holding three part time jobs and full time study, just drinking like a fish. When I moved abroad there were mosquitoes everywhere and they could smell you better if you drank, so naturally I stopped drinking at all. After about a year of this I forgot why I even drank to begin with, and I don't think I would have ever started if everyone around me did not expect that you must drink

[Egan_BW]

It seems strange to me that anyone would really want to have a second drink at all, let alone feel compelled. That's the nature of addition I suppose, but why does ethanol have that effect on humans? Is it mostly chemical at all or just a social expectation to poison yourself?

[nenjin]

a second drink at all, let alone feel compelled. That's the nature of addition I suppose

Well it's hard to do addition with just one thing. In hardcore addition you might add multiple somethings together.

[King Zultan]

I've never really seen the appeal of alcohol, also doesn't help I've yet to encounter any that isn't awful tasting.

[Loud Whispers]

It seems strange to me that anyone would really want to have a second drink at all, let alone feel compelled. That's the nature of addition I suppose, but why does ethanol have that effect on humans? Is it mostly chemical at all or just a social expectation to poison yourself?

Ppl I used to work with would take it as an insult if you refused to multiply with them. Said it really divided the group

[Rolan7]

It seems strange to me that anyone would really want to have a second drink at all, let alone feel compelled. That's the nature of addition I suppose, but why does ethanol have that effect on humans? Is it mostly chemical at all or just a social expectation to poison yourself?

I mean, it causes euphoria.  Music just sounds better, writing flows better, chatting feels exciting.  Giddiness.  It gets rid of all the stupid shit in my brain that stops me from enjoying my free time.

I often say that it's borrowing against the future, but that's partially a cope.  That future can be sleep, in which case- oh no- I actually sleep instead of having a fricken movie marathon.  Or I read a fricken book, something passive and fine.  It would be soooooo worth it... and I never took anything to mitigate my hangovers, except for greasy breakfasts and hydration.  Even facetanking that crap, it was worth it.

But it's not just borrowing against tomorrow, it's borrowing from the next month or so (at least).  It dampens gender dysphoria for a little while but then makes it worse by making my skin gross.  I look so much better now, and that's a nicer normal.

It hurts relationships, too.  Yeah by making me be annoyingly manic (a little or... a lot), but more subtly by making me think that all my relationships are predicated on getting tipsy.  It becomes a chore to talk to people sober, with the obvious conclusion that I'm not actually friends with my friends.  They probably wouldn't even like me sober.

...I'm glad I was wrong about that, mostly.  I have a couple of really good friends who prefer me this way, and that means the world.  Sometimes I *only* stay sober for them.  They say they'll accept whatever I choose, but I don't want to disappoint them.

Because I don't prefer me this way.  I miss that feeling of just completely losing myself in a megamix, or banging out a batshit narrative with no filter.
I wasn't blacking out anymore, you know?  HRT put an end to that without me having to even *try*.  Blacking out was about self-loathing, and I stopped loathing myself.
makes me furious that all I needed for that was a natural chemical, and that that chemical is so fucking politicized.  I still cry occasionally about how long I suffered for NOTHING... for political games...

That's the other thing I guess.  Every time I go to try a light drink (with a friend "trip sitting") I recoil in horror, physically, at the last moment.  I think it's because (and this is a stretch, but try to follow my vibe) I consider alcohol a weapon that kills trans people.  Compared to fighting for transition it's the cheap, accessible, instant-gratification, deadly alternative.  I imagine every fascist/transphobe I've ever known just... grinning.
That was kinda literal, when my drinking was worst...
So yeah...

but on the other hand I want to be happy sometimes, truly relax, and I feel like I never do anymore.  Most people do and it's fine!

but on the other other hand my favorite twitch streamer quit alcohol when she transitioned and she's obviously happier this way.  She's been sober for two years and isn't obsessed with it like I am.  So maybe 4 months isn't the end... maybe it'll keep getting easier, and I can still develop healthy ways to relax.

[Egan_BW]

Yeah, I think you can develop ways to be manic and insane without brain poison. Works for me! Or maybe that's all just sleep deprivation.

Any time I try drinking I just feel the same, though. My first real try, when i turned 21, I still just sat and listened to people talk rather than try to join in. i felt some minor physiological effects a bit later, but mentally, nothing. I think anything positive you get out of being drunk, you can find a way to get there purely internally. Maybe you could try a non-alchoholic beer and see how well the placebo works on you?

[Great Order]

The thyme I got for Christmas has a burgeoning aphid infestation. I can't just spray it down with insecticide since it's, y'know, an eating herb, and Google's now a shit search engine so all the results to fix it are "Drown that bitch in insecticide"

[scriver]

I would suggest using... I don't know the exact English word, but our word for it is cognate with soap. Maybe Pine Soap or something? I spray it on my vegetable plants. Then rinse generously with water after a while and the aphids should be falling off.

It's probably not the best to get inside you so you should probably rinse thoroughly before use too, but it's supposed to not be dangerous.

[Eric Blank]

Parents got the covid, I'm feeling sickly too this morning. Wonderful.

[Egan_BW]

You can knock aphids off of plants with even just normal water in a sprayer, IIRC. But soap probably helps.

[bloop_bleep]

Perhaps use an aphid predator?

[hector13]

$27 - $6,000 for green lacewing eggs.

That’s… that’s quite a range.

I suppose having checked the link they are suggesting you can buy upwards of 250,000 eggs though.

[Great Order]

1000-250000 though, from single shipment to biweekly, and from 1 shipment to 12.

So that's $27 for 1000 eggs, to $6000 for 3,000,000 (Or 37 eggs/dollar vs 500 eggs/dollar)

[King Zultan]

But after they kill the aphids wont you have an infestation of those things?