I have a similar grief. My sister got a cat that ended up hating her so she bought a kitten that she ended up hating. Now I have two cats that love me but the young one chews and scratches everything; destroys things for fun. I am very patient but he is immune to training or domestication; I'd give him away if he did not love me so much. But he must stop eating my foot every 4:00 A.M. ;-;
Used to have a cat like that. If I could swap the dog to get her back I'd do it in a heartbeat.
Scratches on my ankles, being bitten on the ear and ambushed are all preferable to the dog imo. Bea never damaged my stuff, and I'm much more comfortable with even unfriendly cats (she was friendly, but also aggressive) than with any dog.
Dunno about crocs, but baby gators are actually remarkably adorable. It was highly illegal, but we had one as a pet for a while when I was young. They love head scritches.
dealing with them when they grow up isn't something you want to worry about, though
also did i mention it's illegal?
Round here the issue would be the climate more than anything, though I doubt they're legal here without a license. Scotland isn't a good place for crocodiles most of the year, and being cooped up in a house almost every day of the year is no life for a croc of any kind.
I do like crocs though, and would actually seriously consider one of the smaller species as a pet in the right circumstances, so maybe it wasn't the best comparison.
Perhaps a tub of roaches? But then I've kept roaches in the past and liked them more than the dog, so that's also not a great comparison.