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[Kagus]

Y'know, I'd really rather like to not be... Whatever the fuck it is I am. I'd much prefer being someone/thing with a passion.

Doesn't even necessarily need to be a job... Jobs, yeah, sure employment's the first thing someone categorizes you by... but a passion, that's something that transcends barriers. It defines you whether or not someone else wants to define you by that metric.

I have no definition. I am a functional vehicle transporting... nothing. Nothing at all. I just *am*, but what I *am* is an empty silver platter. Serving up the finest opportunities for the potential of something that could have taken that place.


No direction, no strong interests... Only a smattering of light information on a smattering of topics; just enough to pose the right questions in order to make myself sound interested and educated. Coupled with a body that could've been considered attractive in its prime and with the right attention and care, I would've made a pretty good 17th century courtesan. Missed career opportunity, really.

[Hanslanda]

Are we soul-twins Kagus?

[Rockeater]

I got that feeling that I wouldn't have finished my major in any serious place and I waited too long before starting my master so I don't know anything I suppose to know.

[Kagus]

Are we soul-twins Kagus?

Possibly... I'd have to ask the shrooms to confirm.

EDIT: Actually come to think of it, I did end up absorbing my twin in utero. And you're slightly younger than I am, so...

[Yoink]

passion

Take it from me, underground heavy metal is a great, very rewarding thing to be passionate about. You don't even need to play an instrument or anything!
Plus, you live in Norway. I'm pretty sure you can't throw a skolebrod off a rooftop without hitting some amazingly kvlt band on their way to their next demonic ritual of decibel destruction.

[Kagus]

Yeah, plenty of metalheads around here, although most all of them play an instrument of some kind. Possibly just the instrument of "fists", attached to a healthy fascination with getting into fights, but there's usually some form of active participation with the hobby. Shame it's not something I really have any strong feelings about, and that both my guitaring and my fisting are mediocre at best.


Buh... Trying to rack my brains for something I'm actually "good" at, passion or no, is proving to be a rather discouraging endeavor... What with all the many topics that capped out at Novice+ which I have to search through.

[Doomblade187]

Yeah, plenty of metalheads around here, although most all of them play an instrument of some kind. Possibly just the instrument of "fists", attached to a healthy fascination with getting into fights, but there's usually some form of active participation with the hobby. Shame it's not something I really have any strong feelings about, and that both my guitaring and my fisting are mediocre at best.


Buh... Trying to rack my brains for something I'm actually "good" at, passion or no, is proving to be a rather discouraging endeavor... What with all the many topics that capped out at Novice+ which I have to search through.

Attempt combining the various skills to create hybrids?

Just a game logic thought.

[George_Chickens]

I kinda, uh, basically ripped all the skin off my lower lip and now it hurts like hell.

Sometimes, I pull on it so hard, I rip the skin.

[TamerVirus]

I kinda, uh, basically ripped all the skin off my lower lip and now it hurts like hell.

Sometimes, I pull on it so hard, I rip the skin.

[Iduno]

My back is all kinds of fucked up. There's a huge knotted muscle just above my butt, I wake up with my left leg numb and tingling, and I spend all day with pain shooting up and down from my toes to the knot. The universe can't let me spend too long being healthy, or I might start enjoying myself or *gasp* furthering my interests.

Get a heating pad? It isn't a complete cure, but you'll be back to 80% of your normal in no time.

At least it works for me everytime I destroy my back/shoulers.

[Kagus]

Oh hey, I managed to fuck up my upper back/lower neck a couple weeks ago by sleeping in what was clearly an illegal fashion.

It had just about worked itself out, but then I had a bad day yesterday and I kicked a snow pile to try and blow off some stress. Naturally, kicking things with my foot results in injuring my neck. As one would expect.


Also, fuck. Basic living matters should not be this terrifying to do. Why do I have to get myself so worked up over getting a rental place?

[Yoink]

I have ze cold. I had ze cold yesterday but now it is worse.
I am no longer human but a fountain of mucus.

[Kagus]

Went to the viewing, the place seems nice enough but the guy leasing it out is just weird. I mean, he seemed nice enough, but he stopped talking for maybe 2 seconds out of the 30 minutes I was there.

The place honestly seems fine enough, but... I dunno. Wee bit turned off of it. Didn't really help that he was firing off personal questions constantly so I never really got a chance to ask about stuff (he'd then fire off an "Oh yeah! You didn't ask about X, lemme show you that" like, dude, there hasn't been a single break in the conversation for me TO ask about that).


I'm just tired and intimidated. Not looking forward to the logistics of moving and having to arrange for new stuff. Frustrated that this is going to take as long as it likely is going to take.

[Yoink]

Hopefully there's nothing sketchy about the place. Is there a way you can check and make sure that guy is the owner/whatever and able to legally rent out the place?
Not trying to scare you off, but I don't know what the rental market is like over there but I've heard of scams happening. Unless it's some sort of verified listing, I guess.



My mild sad: it's one of those mornings where I have woken up feeling like I barely slept. I was probably cold during the night due to inadequate distribution of blankets, and my cold doesn't seem to have gotten much better.
I probably shouldn't go to work but I really don't wanna call in sick again. Doing it once (technically twice since I realised I had an appointment on the next day I arranged to go in) was stressful enough.

[Kagus]

Hopefully there's nothing sketchy about the place. Is there a way you can check and make sure that guy is the owner/whatever and able to legally rent out the place?
Not trying to scare you off, but I don't know what the rental market is like over there but I've heard of scams happening. Unless it's some sort of verified listing, I guess.

I mean, he's got the keys to everything and is apparently renting out the apartments to the side and above the one in question (yes, this is apparently a triplex, of all things), so I'm inclined to believe him. I also got the impression that he really was a decent enough fellow, just one with high RPM and no fucking filter. The whole tour was basically "Oh you're on welfare? So what kind of condition is it; is it physical or is it more psychiatric? Oh yeah, I used to work with a guy with the social anxiety. Nice enough guy, did his job pretty well, intelligent and all, just sometimes didn't show up to work or would sleep in and stuff. And you're getting help from people? Are they professionals? Are you talking to a psychologist? There's nothing wrong with talking to psychologists y'know. Honestly, more people should do it. I guarantee you; everyone in the world has been through something or other during their life. I'D go to a psychologist, but I can't afford one! So my wife takes the load, hahaha... So how's your social life? Is it okay to be around people? Are you around enough people?", and it was honestly just a bit much.

Contacted another listing, gonna nail down a time for the viewing. This is incredibly awkward. I really don't enjoy telling people that I'm on the dole, even if it does mean that my income is about as rock-solid reliable as it can get.


Anyways, mostly just mild-sad because I had another evening chatting and spending time with the chick I definitely was not supposed to be developing feelings for, and developing more feelings. Which hurts not just because it's a fucking shitty thing for me to do when I still haven't axed things with my girlfriend, but also because I really don't know if she feels the same way back or if she's just being her usual friendly, extroverted self.

And because I'm feeling this way, I act like a complete dork around her when I'm drinking. Which just exacerbates the everything.