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[FallacyofUrist]

"You do understand I have to arrest you for that citizen you just murdered correct? Yes. Murdered. Did you think he was free experience points? You objectified and murdered someone. Someone with a wife. And three children named Votor, Kali, and Vati. How do you think they'll feel when I have to deliver the news that their pappy was just murdered? Votor's birthday is tomorrow! You murdered his hero and father a day before his seventh birthday. How do you think he'll feel? There was going to be a party. With real cake. But you murdered his pappy. Please. Tell me again who the evil one is? You horrible people."

+1. Also:
"Now cease this insanity before it becomes necessary for me to invoke the power of the spirits that advise me..."

[Dorsidwarf]

"You do understand I have to arrest you for that citizen you just murdered correct? Yes. Murdered. Did you think he was free experience points? You objectified and murdered someone. Someone with a wife. And three children named Votor, Kali, and Vati. How do you think they'll feel when I have to deliver the news that their pappy was just murdered? Votor's birthday is tomorrow! You murdered his hero and father a day before his seventh birthday. How do you think he'll feel? There was going to be a party. With real cake. But you murdered his pappy. Please. Tell me again who the evil one is? You horrible people."

"You do understand I have to arrest you for that citizen you just murdered correct? Yes. Murdered. Did you think he was free experience points? You objectified and murdered someone. Someone with a wife. And three children named Votor, Kali, and Vati. How do you think they'll feel when I have to deliver the news that their pappy was just murdered? Votor's birthday is tomorrow!

You murdered his hero and father a day before his seventh birthday. How do you think he'll feel? There was going to be a party. With real cake. But you murdered his pappy. Please. Tell me again who the evil one is? You horrible people."



"pffffffffffff"

"Yeah, no, I can't keep a straight face any more. It was just another damn troll. On the other hand you did kill it, which is illegal under the Preservation of Endangered Species Act (newly revised)."


"But really. If you cross that threshold I will kill you. There are no sneaky ways out this time."

...



                      "FOR THE FREE LANDS!"
         "Victory approaches!

Oh man. Here we go.

"Your loss"



Let's find someone else to be while the Gatekeeper brutally kills this band of would-be heroes.



They'll do.



So, who might this be?

-> Make a suggestion.

[Dustan Hache]

I guess that is the evil king, watching the battle from his window.

[~Neri]

Nah. That's Bob. He's the spymaster. Class Generic. He simply.. Slips from perception. He's so generic you won't notice him if there's a slightly interesting pattern on the wall. Great for spying. Currently he's on break.

[FallacyofUrist]

No! NO! Be The Gatekeeper, as he will clearly perish without our guidance!

[Nunzillor]

He should've just had that beer.

I guess that is the evil king, watching the battle from his window.

+1

[Dorsidwarf]

You are...

I guess that is the evil king, watching the battle from his window.

No!



You are not the king. He is king. Not you. You are not even royalty or in the line of sucession or related at all why would you say that.

Nah. That's Bob. He's the spymaster. Class Generic. He simply.. Slips from perception. He's so generic you won't notice him if there's a slightly interesting pattern on the wall. Great for spying. Currently he's on break.

You are the Spymaster of Äbar, Bob. You have managed to keep this position through the immense upheaval caused by the assassination of the previous king and ascension of King Hrith, by virtue of being un-naturally bland, generic, and in-the-background.

Currently you are watching, with some regret, the Gatekeeper kick the stuffing out of the latest band of heroes here to overthrow Hrith.

No! NO! Be The Gatekeeper, as he will clearly perish without our guidance!

Sure, you suppose. A shame when you've only just started being the rightf-


Uh...





Let's not be the Gatekeeper right now.
Please.
Anyone else.

[~Neri]

Lets be George! Bob's miscreant little brother who lands himself a night in the dungeons every other day! Usually for unruly behavior and drunken brawls.

[NJW2000]

Lets be a slime herder. Every day pushing those gigantic stupid semi-sentient slime moulds about, for measly pay and it's not like there are any perks like the swimmingpool guardgoblin, yeah right Bert doesn't spend all day ogling those Uruk-Hai ladies in his stupid bermuda swimming trunks, anyway, slime herding makes your clothes stink, the things hate you and try to digest you if you so much as nod off a second from all the toxic fumes, and its the lowliest rank. Animal herders like you used to be respected, but now those goddamn beastmasters are getting all the attention and cool megabeasts and ladies and cash, while you have just get slime, slimes, more slimes, and maybe the occassional giant slime or bat, or undead slime (self digesting organisms never smell good, believe me), or maybe even a stupid bat-slime - now there's an idea!

[Dorsidwarf]

I was hoping to stay as Bob a little longer, but we can be the Miscreant or the Herdsman if you want to be, I guess!

[NJW2000]

I thought Bob was busy throwing up.

In that case, go disguise ourselves as an NPC and spy on some heroes outside.

[Dorsidwarf]

Spoiler: AN (click to show/hide)

I thought Bob was busy throwing up.

In that case, go disguise ourselves as an NPC and spy on some heroes outside.

I tend to do all the pictures a while before posting them, so the update was done before I got this!

Lets be George! Bob's miscreant little brother who lands himself a night in the dungeons every other day! Usually for unruly behavior and drunken brawls.

You are now George. You are in prison.
This is usually because of what you call "Resistance against the bloody opressors" and the town guard calls "drunken unruly brawling".
Last night you were not drunk. You meant to break that troll's face. Not that you admitted that to the turnkey, of course.

CLANK

Speaking of which, here he comes. Now's the cha-



...
Well then.

Those cobbles look awfully fast!



A FEW MILES AWAY, AND SLIGHTLY MORE IN THE PAST


                         "Such a beautiful kingdom, isn't it?"

[~Neri]

>Duck!

[Dorsidwarf]

>Duck!

You cannot order the KING because he is too busy becoming king.


"So kind of you to give me this opportunity."



"YOUR MAJESTY"

"No! Get away!"



"P-please!"

"Too late."









You are now George again. Everything looks wrong, and you seem to be floating.

[Nunzillor]

Look around for something that isn't void.