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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1108833 times)

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10800 on: June 20, 2020, 11:58:06 am »

I'm still confused. Being rich doesn't make you more likely to be a paedophile. More likely to be able to fund and hide your perversion, perhaps.
Exactly, it just reveals who's a complete arsehole by handing them keys to impunity

TD1

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10801 on: June 20, 2020, 02:08:52 pm »

Sometimes I wonder what I'd do with absolute power (insofar as a mortal can have it). Then, more worryingly, I wonder what absolute power would do with me.
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Poetry Thread

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10802 on: June 20, 2020, 02:10:22 pm »

Sometimes I wonder what I'd do with absolute power (insofar as a mortal can have it). Then, more worryingly, I wonder what absolute power would do with me.
Everyone pay your Dwarf Fortress tax or 12 years dungeon

TD1

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10803 on: June 20, 2020, 02:19:46 pm »

“And now at last it comes. You will give me the Power freely! In place of the Dark Lord you will set up a Dwarf. And I shall not be dark, but ambitious and terrible as the Morning and the Night! Fair as the Sea and the Sun and the Snow upon the Mountain! Dreadful as the Storm and the Lightning! Stronger than the foundations of the earth. All shall love me and despair!”

He lifted up his hand and from the ring that he wore there issued a great light that illuminated him alone and left all else dark. He stood before the nations seeming now tall beyond measurement, and bearded beyond enduring, terrible and worshipful. Then he let his hand fall, and the light faded, and suddenly he laughed again, and lo! he was shrunken: a stout dwarf, clad in simple white, whose rough voice was harsh yet sad.

“I pass the test”, he said. “I will diminish, and go into the Forums and remain DwarfyOne.”
XXXX

"I would use this Authority from a desire to do good. But through me, it would wield a power too great and terrible to imagine."

XXXX

Honestly, my ambition would be great, my intent honourable. But justice is subjective, and what liberates some oppresses others; it is not a mantle I'd willingly bear.
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Life before death, strength before weakness, journey before destination
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10804 on: June 20, 2020, 02:20:57 pm »

They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper

da_nang

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10805 on: June 20, 2020, 03:32:40 pm »

Beating the simulation by rolling over into 0x7FFF...
« Last Edit: June 21, 2020, 02:35:20 am by da_nang »
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thompson

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10806 on: June 21, 2020, 01:43:14 am »

Sometimes I wonder what I'd do with absolute power (insofar as a mortal can have it). Then, more worryingly, I wonder what absolute power would do with me.
The real issue would be maintaining power. You’d need an aristocratic class of corrupt sicophants who you could bribe with wealth and power of their own in order to keep you on to and prevent any upstart from usurping you. Then you’d need the odd purge to cleanse out the disloyal and instil a sense of fear in the others so that they remain content to serve beneath you. If you’re not a complete asshole, you’ll just wind up like Lenin while a real asshole takes the reigns. This is the fatal weakness of autocracy.
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Iduno

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10807 on: June 21, 2020, 10:42:30 am »

So, is Cameron just making shitty decisions because he thinks that way people will remember him as something other than a pigfucker? Does he not know he can be "That pigfucker Cameron, who ruined the NHS" etc.?


Everyone stop bullying Americans, it's time to bully Europeans

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ChairmanPoo

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10808 on: June 21, 2020, 11:10:27 am »

So, is Cameron just making shitty decisions because he thinks that way people will remember him as something other than a pigfucker? Does he not know he can be "That pigfucker Cameron, who ruined the NHS" etc.?


Everyone stop bullying Americans, it's time to bully Europeans

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
You know Cameron has been out of goverment for almost four years now, right?

What does he have to do with anything? As far as I know he´s in his house cooking bread.


« Last Edit: June 21, 2020, 11:13:55 am by ChairmanPoo »
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scriver

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10809 on: June 21, 2020, 11:12:40 am »

Que no los bocadillos
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ChairmanPoo

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10810 on: June 21, 2020, 11:14:14 am »

Que no los bocadillos
Scheisseeeeeeee 

Fixed now
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10811 on: June 21, 2020, 01:04:50 pm »

God fucking damnit.Today there was a demonstration against the lockdown measures in the Hague. It had been forbidden by the government because they expected more people to show up than deemed safe because of corona.

Instead, people organised a 'picknick' and came anyways.The mayor gave in to the protestors, and allowed them to have a demonstration after all (from 13:00h to 13:30h).

This all went peaceful, until football hooligans came to riot.Police used water cannons and cavalry charges to disperse them and around 100 people have been arrested.

I am okay with that. If some rednecks come and turn a peaceful demo into riots, sure, put a water cannon on them and book them (note that dutch police are in no way comparable to US police. Dutch police serve the public and are your friend).

But what I am not okay with, is that a Volkskrant reporter, who happened to ride his bike a few blocks away from the demo, was coerced towards the demonstration site by the police, and when he got there, he was arrested by the riot police. Even after showing his press card, he was not released and is still being held.

And that pisses me off.  Free press is one of THE pillars of our free democracy.  Not sure what to do, I am toying with the idea to call 112 (911) to report the mayor of the Hague for endangering democracy (a charge which falls under the terrorism laws nowadays).
(why the mayor you might wonder, that's because in the Netherlands, the mayor is the chief of police)


Keep your stinking fingers off our reporters!
« Last Edit: June 21, 2020, 01:13:00 pm by martinuzz »
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http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10812 on: June 22, 2020, 06:02:13 am »

Wait, so they forced the reporter to join the riot and then arrested him for being there? wut? There's entrapment and then there's this

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #10813 on: June 22, 2020, 06:12:43 am »

Police forced the reporter to join the peaceful protest and then other (riot) police arrested him for being there.  There were no riots at the Malieveld, there was a sit-in.
The rioting football hooligans were rioting somewhere in the city center.
At the end of the day, over 400 people were arrested.
In a statement, our prime minister did not condemn the demonstration, but he did add that 'football hooligans who had used tons of cocaine'  ruined the peace.
« Last Edit: June 22, 2020, 06:15:11 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479
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