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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1108710 times)

smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4950 on: February 24, 2017, 04:18:45 pm »

Lol at Dutch bureaucracy. Starting next year, mandatory military service will no longer be for men only, but also for women.

But since our military service has been adjourned indefinitly in 1997, nothing will change in practice. There's no military service, we only have a professional standing army.

It does mean however that if at any time in the future military service is resumed, the feminists will be happy.

Why were women exempt in the first place, there is a lot more work in the military than just front-line duty.

I think he meant the draft, just means that women won't be exempt from the draft or mandatory military service if they ever reinstate it.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4951 on: February 24, 2017, 04:21:28 pm »

For some reason the argument the Defense department used was that women had 'too much distance from the job market'.
Basically Defense department was an old bastion of christian-machistic tradition, until we got our first female minister of Defense 8 years ago.

I think he meant the draft, just means that women won't be exempt from the draft or mandatory military service if they ever reinstate it.
Correct. I wasn't sure whether to use draft or not. Is it called draft during peacetime?
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4952 on: February 25, 2017, 05:49:00 am »

Damn, shortage of nurses I reported about earlier is no joke.
A hospital in the southwest of Netherlands has had a pemanent job opening listed for years now, for emergency room nurses.
The last time they had an applicant, was 3 years ago. Ever since, half a dozen or more nurses have quit their jobs (retirement age, mostly).

So now they're forced to work with interns. 1 out of 3 emergency room nurses is an intern, despite national recommendation being maximum 1 out of 6.

What's worse, the economy is growing. The Netherlands has come out of the crisis well, and economic prospects are looking up. We even have a national budget surplus this year. That's bad, because when economy is doing well, less people choose the healthcare profession.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Antioch

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4953 on: February 25, 2017, 06:16:42 am »

Damn, shortage of nurses I reported about earlier is no joke.
A hospital in the southwest of Netherlands has had a pemanent job opening listed for years now, for emergency room nurses.
The last time they had an applicant, was 3 years ago. Ever since, half a dozen or more nurses have quit their jobs (retirement age, mostly).

So now they're forced to work with interns. 1 out of 3 emergency room nurses is an intern, despite national recommendation being maximum 1 out of 6.

What's worse, the economy is growing. The Netherlands has come out of the crisis well, and economic prospects are looking up. We even have a national budget surplus this year. That's bad, because when economy is doing well, less people choose the healthcare profession.

If you haven't had an applicant in 3 years, MAYBE you aren't paying enough.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4954 on: February 25, 2017, 06:28:05 am »

That's not the issue (at least not for that specific hospital. In general, yeah nurses could be better paid across the whole country to make the studies more attractive). The issue is, there aren't enough nurses. That hospital isn't the only one with shortages. What is a factor though, is that it is in the province of Zeeland, which is the least attractive province of the Netherlands for young people.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Grim Portent

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4955 on: February 25, 2017, 07:49:08 am »

Are the courses needed for nursing qualifications subsidized in the Netherlands? One of the easiest ways to increase the number of nurses available is to make it cheaper to learn to be one.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4956 on: February 25, 2017, 07:57:53 am »

Are the courses needed for nursing qualifications subsidized in the Netherlands? One of the easiest ways to increase the number of nurses available is to make it cheaper to learn to be one.
Everyone can get government funding for any study. However, it's a loan, so you'll need to repay it. And the past 2 decades saw so many budget cuts that it's not enough to pay studies and cost of living. Students without rich parents will need to have a side job next to their studies. I wasn't kidding last week when I wrote that prostitution is a thing amongst female students.

Making studies cheaper would help a bit. Increasing wages in the lower healthcare sector would probably also help. Main problem is that student influx can't keep up with population aging causing increased healthcare demand. We need more immigrants.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

da_nang

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4957 on: February 25, 2017, 08:30:58 am »

Alternatively, more babies.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4958 on: February 25, 2017, 08:49:18 am »

Or less old people. As a side bonus, that would help reducing our CO2 emissions. /s
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Grim Portent

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4959 on: February 25, 2017, 09:24:07 am »

Alternatively, more babies.

More babies requires more nurses to help deliver and provide post natal care. It's a self worsening problem.

What you need is to make nursing training cheaper so you get more home grown nurses half a decade down the line, but you also need immigrant nurses to make up the difference in meantime. Immigrants are a patch job when it comes to educated workers, unless you get rid of enough other people their age that they don't just make the next age bomb bigger.

Soylent green is always an option to deal with the elderly problem though. /s
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There once was a dwarf in a cave,
who many would consider brave.
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he went out for a sock,
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scriver

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4960 on: February 25, 2017, 10:04:53 am »

Alternatively, less people trying to make a living out of degrees with no openings rather than educating themselves in areas where jobs exist.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4961 on: February 25, 2017, 12:29:17 pm »

I have a friendly EU related joke for Polish forumites

TheBiggerFish

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4962 on: February 25, 2017, 12:29:51 pm »

Ha!  Nice!
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4963 on: February 25, 2017, 04:45:38 pm »

Speaking of Poland, the owner of the Polish transport company that owned the truck that drove into a crowd in Berlin during christmas, has asked Germany on Polish national TV to please give his truck back, fast.
The owner (and brother of the dead Polish truck driver killed by the terrorist), Ariel Zurawski, claims that the loss of the truck has left him unable to do his work, and if he doesn't get it back soon, his company will be declared bankrupt.
He says he does not want to claim money from the German government, he just wants his truck back so he can resume his business and not go bankrupt.

Chances are slim though he will see his truck again. It's still evidence in an ongoing anti-terrorist investigation. And when that's done, a German museum has already called dibs on it to display it, claiming it has societal and historical value.

After the TV broadcast, people from around the globe are spontaneously offering donations.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4964 on: February 25, 2017, 05:08:53 pm »

Under what fucking bullshit does a German museum have any right to steal things?
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