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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1060881 times)

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2085 on: May 05, 2016, 06:10:51 am »

EDIT: Also, btw, EU to fine countries 'hundreds of millions of pounds' for refusing to take refugees.

I've generally been on the side that having immigration, when your native reproduction rate is low, is good. However, the way EU handles immigration as of now is complete catastrophe.
Apparently EU (read Germany) is now going to fine people for refusing to take on Germany/Sweden-invited refugees. The cohesion of EU is sure to improve after such measures!

brexit when
Spoiler: Soon (click to show/hide)

*EDIT
Our progressive mayor candidate called moderate Muslims Uncle Toms
ayyyyyy lmao fam who thought the leftists calling BAMEs race traitors was just a University and media thing, shariah law got next level progressive potential
« Last Edit: May 05, 2016, 05:34:16 pm by Loud Whispers »
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Morrigi

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2086 on: May 05, 2016, 02:13:47 pm »

I... What? What the Christ?
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2087 on: May 05, 2016, 05:32:35 pm »

Lmao Zac Goldsmith just lost the election because one of his strongholds basically eliminated all of their voters from the registry due to a technical gaffer

Looking like it's gonna be a Sadiq London all the way
Quote
Sadiq Khan shared a platform with five Islamic extremists at a political meeting where women were told to use a separate entrance, the Evening Standard can reveal.
Labour’s candidate for Mayor of London took part with an activist who has threatened “fire throughout the world”, a supporter of terror group Hamas, a preacher who backs an Islamic state and a Muslim leader accused of advocating attacks on the Royal Navy if it stopped arms being smuggled into Gaza.
Invitations said “all welcome” but made clear that women would be segregated at the door, stating: “Ladies’ entrance on Lessingham Avenue next to the snooker club.”
Also on the platform was a controversial Surrey vicar and conspiracy theorist who has claimed Israel could have been responsible for the terrorist attack on New York’s Twin Towers.

B A N T E R

Interesting thing is that Sadiq Khan is essentially the man who's been running the Labour Party for some time. He's the guy who made Ed Milipede win over his far more charismatic brother (thus dooming them to landslide defeat in the general election) and then he's the guy who nominated Jeremy Corbyn to win over literally everyone else. I suspect him choosing Corbyn is a cunning ruse to make Labour lose even more, so that when he leaves with a proven track-record as London Mayor he himself will be able to bid for leadership of Labour and eventually, leadership of the United Kingdom. Ultimate nimble navigator

Honestly he seems all right, London represent, CLIMB SADIQ CLIMB, THE DREAM IS REAL

smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2088 on: May 05, 2016, 06:02:01 pm »

Lmao Zac Goldsmith just lost the election because one of his strongholds basically eliminated all of their voters from the registry due to a technical gaffer

Looking like it's gonna be a Sadiq London all the way
Quote
Sadiq Khan shared a platform with five Islamic extremists at a political meeting where women were told to use a separate entrance, the Evening Standard can reveal.
Labour’s candidate for Mayor of London took part with an activist who has threatened “fire throughout the world”, a supporter of terror group Hamas, a preacher who backs an Islamic state and a Muslim leader accused of advocating attacks on the Royal Navy if it stopped arms being smuggled into Gaza.
Invitations said “all welcome” but made clear that women would be segregated at the door, stating: “Ladies’ entrance on Lessingham Avenue next to the snooker club.”
Also on the platform was a controversial Surrey vicar and conspiracy theorist who has claimed Israel could have been responsible for the terrorist attack on New York’s Twin Towers.

B A N T E R

Interesting thing is that Sadiq Khan is essentially the man who's been running the Labour Party for some time. He's the guy who made Ed Milipede win over his far more charismatic brother (thus dooming them to landslide defeat in the general election) and then he's the guy who nominated Jeremy Corbyn to win over literally everyone else. I suspect him choosing Corbyn is a cunning ruse to make Labour lose even more, so that when he leaves with a proven track-record as London Mayor he himself will be able to bid for leadership of Labour and eventually, leadership of the United Kingdom. Ultimate nimble navigator

Honestly he seems all right, London represent, CLIMB SADIQ CLIMB, THE DREAM IS REAL

Which London though? ;)
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2089 on: May 05, 2016, 06:16:26 pm »

Greater London, not the City of London

Orange Wizard

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2090 on: May 05, 2016, 07:37:42 pm »

Please explain to me why these people are allowed to meet without having the Home Office slobbering all over them?
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Wolfhunter107

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2091 on: May 05, 2016, 07:46:09 pm »

Greater London, not the City of London
What's the difference?
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Orange Wizard

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2092 on: May 05, 2016, 08:00:38 pm »

City of London is the middle bit, Greater London includes all the crappy districts around it.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2093 on: May 06, 2016, 02:02:12 pm »

Greater London, not the City of London
What's the difference?

We have the Lord Mayor and the Mayor, the Lord Mayor being mayor of the City of London and the Mayor being the mayor of London which is all of London around the City of London. The City of London and Westminster used to be two rival cities, but then they fused and just became one big London, but the City of London retained its rights in the Magna Carta (hence why the government is in Westminster, not the City of London). Oh yeah and 50 years ago the Westminster borough was awarded city status again, so London is technically 3 cities.
The City of London is basically pure, distilled shekel magic: finance, broking, insurance, legal, fund managers, banking and tech startups. Greater London is more diversified into everything. Whilst Greater London is more powerful and wealthier than the City of London, the City of London reserves certain powers and is probably wealthier than any two of the financial centres in Greater London combined, depending on how you measure it - so it's still pretty powerful. Oh yeah, and the City of London is a democracy ran by businesses (by Livery Companies, think evolved guilds, where the guilds are basically representations of the associated businesses), I think it might be the only one in the world where that is de jure the case.
There are Livery Companies of:
Mercers (general merchants), Grocers (spice merchants), Drapers (wool and cloth merchants), Fishmongers, Goldsmiths (bullion dealers), Skinners* (fur traders), Merchant Taylors* (tailors), Haberdashers (clothiers in sewn and fine materials, eg. silk & velvet), Salters (traders of salts and chemicals), Ironmongers, Vintners (wine merchants), Clothworkers, Dyers, Brewers, Leathersellers, Pewterers (pewter and metal manufacturers), Barbers (incl. surgeons and dentists, since people used to have surgery/dentistry by the most experienced human cutters... Barbers), Cutlers (knife, sword and utensil makers), Bakers, Wax Chandlers (wax candle makers), Tallow Chandlers (tallow candle makers), Armourers and Brasiers (armour makers and brass workers), Girdlers (belt and girdle makers), Butchers, Saddlers, Carpenters, Cordwainers (fine leather workers and shoemakers), Painter-Stainers, Curriers (leather dressers and tanners), Masons (stonemasons), Plumbers, Innholders (tavern keepers), Founders (metal casters and melters), Poulters (poulterers), Cooks, Coopers (barrel and cask makers), Tylers and Bricklayers (builders), Bowyers (long-bow makers), Fletchers (arrow makers), Blacksmiths, Joiners and Ceilers (wood craftsmen), Weavers, Woolmen, Scriveners (court scribes and notaries public), Fruiterers, Plaisterers (plasterers), Stationers and Newspaper Makers (journalists and publishers), Broderers (embroiderers), Upholders (upholsterers), Musicians, Turners (lathe operators), Basketmakers, Glaziers and Painters of Glass, Horners (horn workers and plasticians), Farriers (horseshoe makers and horse veterinarians), Paviors (road and highway pavers), Loriners (equestrian bit, bridle and spur suppliers), Apothecaries (physicians and pharmacists), Shipwrights (shipbuilders and maritime professionals), Spectacle Makers, Clockmakers, Glovers, Feltmakers (hat makers), Framework Knitters, Needlemakers, Gardeners, Tin Plate Workers, Wheelwrights, Distillers, Pattenmakers (wooden-shoe makers), Glass Sellers, Coachmakers and Coach Harness Makers (now for cars), Gunmakers, Gold and Silver Wyre Drawers (threadmakers for military and society clothing), Makers of Playing Cards, Fanmakers, Carmen (vehicle drivers), Master Mariners, City of London Solicitors' Company (lawyers), Farmers, Air Pilots, Tobacco Pipe Makers and Tobacco Blenders, Furniture Makers, Scientific Instrument Makers, Chartered Surveyors, Chartered Accountants in England and Wales, Chartered Secretaries and Administrators, Builders Merchants, Launderers, Marketors, Actuaries, Insurers, Arbitrators, Engineers, Fuellers, Lightmongers (electric lighting suppliers), Environmental Cleaners, Chartered Architects, Constructors, Information Technologists, World Traders, Water Conservators, Firefighters, Hackney Carriage Drivers (licensed taxicab drivers), Management Consultants, International Bankers, Tax Advisers, Security Professionals, Educators and Arts Scholars.

I believe every single trade known to mankind that is not illegal by British law is represented. My favourite are the wax workers because they contribute much to bee conservation <3
Also the Monarch has to ask permission to enter the City of London, as in the past the Merchants were always worried about the Monarch walking in with a load of troops and then taxing the shit out of their wool. Nowadays this is not so much a fear, as the Queen has enough wool.

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2095 on: May 07, 2016, 01:27:35 pm »

Apparently this protest in Poland against the authoritarian government was the largest protest in Poland since the collapse of the Sovjet Union. In Warsaw, about 250000 people took to the streets.
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Sonlirain

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2096 on: May 07, 2016, 02:33:40 pm »

Sooo... a priest from a village that's pretty near my home town said that he will grant absolution to people that kill those protesters.
Fun times.
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Antsan

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2097 on: May 07, 2016, 03:20:49 pm »

Anarchists Clash With Police Near Austrian Border
http://abcnews.go.com/International/wireStory/anarchists-clash-police-austrian-border-38952949
So, they're Anarchists. How do they know that? How does it relate to the incident reported?

Sooo... a priest from a village that's pretty near my home town said that he will grant absolution to people that kill those protesters.
Fun times.
Wow, that's fucked up.
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Loud Whispers

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« Last Edit: May 07, 2016, 03:50:50 pm by Loud Whispers »
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Sergarr

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related news thread
« Reply #2099 on: May 07, 2016, 03:54:24 pm »

Sooo... a priest from a village that's pretty near my home town said that he will grant absolution to people that kill those protesters.
Fun times.
woah

Well, I knew that the religious types in Poland were kinda crazy, but this is getting kind of too crazy for comfort.
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