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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1109190 times)

TempAcc

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4770 on: February 01, 2017, 04:00:11 pm »

DISTRUPTION HYPE
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Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4771 on: February 01, 2017, 04:27:45 pm »

The French don't do polling by religion, but I wouldn't make too much of a few anecdotes. If we look at the 2012 results, Le Pen seriously underperformed in the areas thos journalists visited.
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4772 on: February 01, 2017, 04:30:55 pm »

Can I still copyright "Le pen, du vin et du boursin"?
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4773 on: February 02, 2017, 03:36:43 am »

You can try. Although that's a bit lamer than the bunch of right-wing MPs that organized regular "apéro saucisson vin rouge" (pork sausage and red wine snacks) to stick it to the muslims defend French value.
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4774 on: February 02, 2017, 03:48:51 am »

Why would an innocent word joke be lamer than a racist fuck initiative?
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4775 on: February 02, 2017, 03:53:03 am »

Because Le Pen is not pronounced anything like Le Pain.


The Penelopegate of Fillian is continuing and starting to erobde his lead in the polls. Polls for the first round are now 27% for Le Pen, 23% for Macron and 20% for Fillion. Excellent news.
« Last Edit: February 02, 2017, 05:07:28 am by Sheb »
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4776 on: February 02, 2017, 07:53:45 am »

In an as of yet unique case, a charges have been pressed in the Netherlands against the Dutch bank Rabobank, and it's top management, accusing them of being accomplice to murder, and other crimes against humanity committed by the Mexican drugs cartel, prompted by a US investigation into moneylaundring of cartel money by a daughter company of the bank, Rabobank N.A., situated in Calexico, a US town near the border of Mexico.

The case is unique, because instead of just focussing on moneylaundry, the case is also about the effects on the Mexican population.
Criminal justice lawyer Göran Sluiter, who filed the case on behalf of SMX Collective, says: "moneylaundry is a crime with victims. Drug organisations are extremely violent, and moneylaundry is essential to their ability to function".
SMX Collective is an organisation which fights for human rights in Mexico, with one of it's founder's, Fernando Hernández, living in the Netherlands.

Sluiter and his clients decided not to wait for the results of the US investigation into the daughter company. They say they do this to prevent what happened during the Libor case from happening again.
Back then, the Rabobank was fined 774 million dollar for manipulating interest fees. However, when a criminal case was filed in the Netherlands, it was dismissed, because 'there has already been too much investigation into the matter, and there are juridical shortcomings in those other investigations'.
To prevent that argument from being used again, Sluiter decided to press charges now, and not wait for the results of the US investigation.

According to Hernández, financial institutions like the Rabobank play a key role in the success of the drug cartels. He has asked Sluiter to sue both the bank as institute, as well as it's senior staff (as natural persons), for being accomplice to murder, and crimes against humanity.

Sluiter: "the Rabobank must have known of the drug cartel's prescence. Despite this, they have closed their eyes. By knowingly laundrying criminal money, they have made themselves member of a criminal organisation".

Official Rabobank spokesman Eijpe refuses to answer the question whether Rabobank was aware of the prescence of drug cartels in Calexico. Former employees of Rabobank N.A. have not responded to interview requests.

http://www.volkskrant.nl/binnenland/aanklacht-rabobank-medeplichtig-aan-moord-en-misdaden-drugskartels~a4456671/
« Last Edit: February 02, 2017, 07:55:38 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Sheb

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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

Sheb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4778 on: February 03, 2017, 04:39:42 am »

That Fillion thing is getting tastier by the day. Now some French TV channel dug out an interview Penelope Fillion gave to the Sunday Telegraph in 2007 where she says "I've never been his assistant or anything like that" and "I don't take care of his communication".

Her lawyer, making an impressive act of bad faith is trying to claim the 45-minutes interview was taken "out of context".

Some on the right are trying to convince Fillion to step down, to be replaced by one of the front runner, Alain Juppé (Prime minister in the 90's, condemned to a deffered prison sentence and some year of ineligibility for paying party workers with funds from the City of Paris) or Sarkozy (Former president, hasn't actually be condemned for anything yet, but is being charged in at least a couple case of corruption, illegal campaign financing and the like).

Fillion has vowed not to step down, and claim the decision to press charges are politically motivated (he might have a small point: prosecutors in France are notable dependent on the executive), but then the whole thing was broken out by newspapers in the first place, and the case against him seems so strong that it'd be strange if it wasn't investigated. However, the scandal of corruption goes well beyond Fillion, is not so much an extreme case as a representative of the way the French right-wing operate in Parliament. At least a dozen MPs have decided to change assistants since the start of Penelopegate.
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4779 on: February 03, 2017, 04:51:37 am »

A French soldier guarding the Louvre had to shoot a person trying to attack him with a knife. The man has been brought to hospital with critical injuries.
A police source told French media that the man tried to enter the museum's underground store with a briefcase.

The French minister of internal affairs Tweeted that it was a 'serious incident'
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4780 on: February 03, 2017, 01:34:01 pm »

Surprised that you didn't mention reports about the man apparently shouting 'Allahu Ackbar'.

I wonder if that'll affect the election polls.
Probably won't, but it will undermine the French state further

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4781 on: February 03, 2017, 04:49:48 pm »

While halfway through the day, media reported that the man's nationality was still unknown, and that he was no longer in life-threatening condition, it has now become known that the man is a 29 year old Egyptian who lives in Dubai, who had come to France on a tourist visum in januari.
His condition has been scaled up to life-threatening again. He has been hit by 5 bullets, the majority of which hit the gut area.
So at least 3 gutshots. I'd say expect him to die.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4782 on: February 03, 2017, 08:22:44 pm »

While halfway through the day, media reported that the man's nationality was still unknown, and that he was no longer in life-threatening condition, it has now become known that the man is a 29 year old Egyptian who lives in Dubai, who had come to France on a tourist visum in januari.
His condition has been scaled up to life-threatening again. He has been hit by 5 bullets, the majority of which hit the gut area.
So at least 3 gutshots. I'd say expect him to die.

Don't underestimate the miracle of modern medicine! Though yeah, a gut shot would be pretty bad.

Also, he's an Egyptian, therefore, we must ban all refugees from Egypt! (just playing Trumpian logic here).

Anyway, those 81 Dutch parties have been trimmed down to 28. The article lists a couple of fringe parties, including one that is an attempt at representing the 'stay at home' or 'none of the above' vote.

Having such a protest party would be interesting here in the US, especially given our FPTP system.
« Last Edit: February 03, 2017, 08:25:45 pm by smjjames »
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Flying Dice

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4783 on: February 04, 2017, 04:05:15 pm »

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smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #4784 on: February 04, 2017, 10:19:41 pm »

Any French Bay12ers around? I know Sheb is Belgian, though I don't know if he's of Walloonian or Flandersian (Flanderian?).

Marine Le Pens plan to FAITES DE NOUVEAU LA FRANCE!,  or the highights of the 144 points anyway. I fed 'MAKE FRANCE GREAT AGAIN!' to google translate, so, pardon me if the translation is off.

In the 'national identity' portion, what is meant by the 'national novel'?
« Last Edit: February 04, 2017, 10:21:18 pm by smjjames »
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