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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1099595 times)

Dorsidwarf

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3570 on: August 05, 2016, 04:50:08 pm »

LW stop being quotable I'm going through signatures too fast even with two slots dedicated to you.

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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3571 on: August 06, 2016, 03:47:21 am »

At least 13 people dead in pub 'le Cuba Libre' in Rouen, France.
Not terrorism this time though. The ceiling caught fire when people tried to light candles on a birthday cake. From the burning ceiling, toxic fumes were released from the material used for sound isolation, and at least thirteen young people age 18-25 died.

Some people from the surrounding area reported that there had been explosions. The police denies that though. They say the people likely mistook the sound of windows popping from the fire's heat with explosions.
« Last Edit: August 06, 2016, 03:50:48 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

andrea

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3572 on: August 06, 2016, 03:59:13 am »

how did the roof catch on fire from birthday candles? did they try to light them with a flamethrower, or was it just EXTREMELY flammable?

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3573 on: August 06, 2016, 04:01:16 am »

I guess they forgot to impregnate the sound isolation foam, which is pretty flammable.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Orange Wizard

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3574 on: August 06, 2016, 04:03:17 am »

I guess they forgot to impregnate the sound isolation foam, which is pretty flammable.
Hehehehe

sorry

ahem

ha
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3575 on: August 06, 2016, 04:38:41 am »

The mayor of a Dutch town has decided to cancel the sheltering of 4 male Syrian refugees, in a street where a young couple live that were witness to, and survivors of the terrorist attack at a tourist beach in Tunesia. The couple are too terrified of groups of muslim men, and the prospect of the 4 men coming to live in their street was sending them into daily panic attacks. After personally visiting the couple and speaking with their doctor, the mayor decided that it would be too detrimental to the couple's wellbeing, and cancelled the deal.

The mayor is now considering either cancelling the shelter altogether, or instead putting a Syrian family with children there instead of 4 men.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3576 on: August 06, 2016, 05:57:56 am »

Meanwhile in Turkey, a US citizen, employed by NASA, has been arrested in Turkey for 'having ties to the Gulen movement'.

I guess Kerry, who will be going on an official visit to Turkey at the end of this month, will have one more thing to talk with Erdogan about.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

hops

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3577 on: August 06, 2016, 07:24:28 am »

Oh, fucking great, I move to Germany at the moment people start being Nazis again.
« Last Edit: August 06, 2016, 07:27:00 am by Cinder »
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Teneb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3578 on: August 06, 2016, 10:21:32 am »

At least 13 people dead in pub 'le Cuba Libre' in Rouen, France.
Not terrorism this time though. The ceiling caught fire when people tried to light candles on a birthday cake. From the burning ceiling, toxic fumes were released from the material used for sound isolation, and at least thirteen young people age 18-25 died.

Some people from the surrounding area reported that there had been explosions. The police denies that though. They say the people likely mistook the sound of windows popping from the fire's heat with explosions.
Oh hey, it's like people don't see if similar shit happened in other countries to prevent further tragedies.
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hops

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3579 on: August 06, 2016, 10:43:30 am »

It's a bad idea to entrust building standards to the builder. There are some areas that restrictive laws would be bad, but building safety isn't one. Of course, that would be associated with higher costs, but it's better than people dying and your capital investment exploding in a fiery inferno.
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3580 on: August 06, 2016, 02:40:49 pm »

A guy shouting allahu akhbar charged two police officers with a machete at the Charleroi police station in Belgium. One of the officers was seriously injured in the face and she was rushed to hospital, the other officer was only lightly injured. A third officer shot the perpetrator, who has died in hospital not much later. The Belgian prime minister has returned from his holidays and says "there seems to be strong evidence pointing at this being an act of terrorism".

Slightly sad that so many Jihadis get killed instead of arrested. That's a possible loss of much information on terror networks, which some humane western torture could have divulged.

(or perhaps they only say they were killed and they are being interrogated in a blacksite for the rest of their officially non-existing lives)
« Last Edit: August 06, 2016, 02:47:40 pm by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Rolepgeek

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3581 on: August 06, 2016, 03:12:41 pm »

Torture does not usually work. Building rapport is a more effective means of obtaining information; the innocent say anything to stop the pain, the fanatical give you nothing of value. But of course, building rapport with a terrorist is unthinkable, and the only acceptable means of trying to stop further deaths is with pain.

Especially not with individuals being radicalized. I don't think you need to be armed by financial backers in order to get access to a machete
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3582 on: August 06, 2016, 03:52:38 pm »

True, machete guy probably had no intel. Guys with AK47s and or bomb vests though would at least know where they got those.

« Last Edit: August 06, 2016, 04:01:47 pm by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Rolepgeek

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3583 on: August 06, 2016, 03:57:41 pm »

Slightly sad that so many Jihadis get killed instead of arrested. That's a possible loss of much information on terror networks, which some humane western torture could have divulged.

I'd much rather they were killed than released after a handful of years in a cushy prison cell, only to take another crack at the whole terrorism thing (with the increased knowledge and contacts that comes with a stay in prison, naturally) upon release.

Yeah man prison sure is comfy. Terrorists sure do usually get released after 4-5 years.

Well, maybe in Europe. In US we have the PATRIOT Act to worry about, and prisons run for profit. Maybe you guys are more humane than you might prefer.
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MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #3584 on: August 06, 2016, 03:59:16 pm »

True, machete guy probably had no intel. Guys with AK47s and or bomb vests though would at least know where they got those.
Honestly, I doubt that would give you very much. The world is full of dealers without direct connections to terrorist orgs, they probably use them more than some underground terrorroad.
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