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[Transcendant]

A lot of us have problems with stress and anxiety. I do.

I'm trying to figure out some of the ways people meditate or relax or something. I hear stress is terrible for you and I'm trying to reduce that. I think we could all use some less stress.

Any ideas?

[LordBucket]

ways people meditate

Meditation is directed thought. To meditate you either:

A) Think about a thing
B) Don't think about "a thing

For example, let's say your meditative focus is...the sun. Think about the sun. If you find yourself not thinking about the sun, think about the sun instead. Repeat. Perhaps you're visualizing the sun. Perhaps you're intending/thinking yourself as "being" the sun, or being "one" with the sun, you and the sun, together as a single entity.

The specific focus is up to you. Your observed experience is a popular choice. As is God, or specific aspects of God, or specific divinities, Krishna, Lakshmi, take your pick. Some schools of thought propose that some specific foci tend to promote rather specific results. Others are more vague about specific benefits.

Alternately, there is the "don't think about a thing" method. For example, elephants. Don't think about elephants. Think about anything you want other than elephants, but don't think about elephants. Contrary to the claims of some people, who presumably don't engage in this form of meditation, not thinking about a thing is an entirely learnable skill. usually, however, the "don't" think foci tend to not be specific. Instead of "don't think about elephants" the more common choice is don't think about anything. Suspend all thought whatever. Suspend all judgement. Simply be a passive lens through which your observation passes without distortion by thought.

or relax

Oh. That's much easier:

1) Alcohol, xanax, or other sedatives
2) Sleep
3) Post-sex
4) Hyponosis, self adminsitered or otherwise
5) Exercise
6) Alternated muscle tension/relaxation
7) See a masseuse
Etc.

I hear stress is terrible for you and I'm trying to reduce that

Well, any of the above might help. But personally, I've found that eliminating the causes of stress is an excellent method. What is causing your stress? Psychotic roomates? Move. Don't like you've job? Find a different one. Family pestering you? Break off contact. Etc. No more stress. Though sometimes this is easier said than done. But consider the possibility. Avoiding and enduring are both options. Sometimes avoiding is easier.

[i2amroy]

usually, however, the "don't" think foci tend to not be specific. Instead of "don't think about elephants" the more common choice is don't think about anything. Suspend all thought whatever. Suspend all judgement. Simply be a passive lens through which your observation passes without distortion by thought.

Note on this one, but a lot of meditative practices that have this as an eventual goal tend to do this by doing the first one (i.e. think about a thing) and focusing on something that you do subconsciously (like say breathing). After all if all you are thinking about it breathing, you will, be definition, not be thinking about anything else. The idea is then once you get really good at just thinking about breathing all you have to do is let your subconscious take back over handling your breathing (which is still hard, but not too hard because that's what it does the majority of the time) and therefore take the step to going from thinking about breathing to thinking about nothing.

I'm going to fully endorse Lord Bucket's suggestion about trying to eliminate possible sources of stress first; a lot of what most people suffer can be cured by just small lifestyle changes, and that actually treats the roots of the problem rather than just attempting to cover up symptoms. That said if you wanted to learn how to do just some simple meditation stuff the steps are pretty easy:
1) Sit in a comfortable chair. Make sure your weight is fully distributed across your legs, the goal is for you to be able to sit perfectly still without moving for long periods of time. Lying down also works, but risks falling asleep (which while I find worked pretty good at getting rid of nightmares for me, it kinda defeats the whole "remain in a calm but conscious state" thing ). Center your head on your shoulders, and rest your hands in your lap (lots of people espouse various hand postures, but all that's really important is that they are in a comfortable, relaxed position that you can hold for hours if need be). Sound wise I find having just a bit of white noise (a trickle of water, just the hum of the lights, etc.), helps me, but ideally you want it to be as quiet as possible short of that.
2) Close your eyes (if you are having trouble with falling asleep this isn't required and a half closed or unfocused view will work, but closed helps block out all that data the best).
3) Focus on the bridge of your nose as you breath through your nose. Breathe normally and count either your in or your out breaths (not both).
4) Every time you get to 8, start over at 1 again on the next breath. If you lose count, or find yourself thinking about anything other than your breath, start over at 1 again.
5) Continue until you are done! When you're done work your way out slowly, then give yourself a slow stretch and head on your way. Make sure to give yourself a bit of time to get out of it, a shrieking alarm or just stepping straight out into a loud area can undo quite a bit of your work pretty quickly if you don't give yourself a few minutes to work up to it.
6) Optional: For longer periods and as you get more practice you can consider working on stopping the count and just being. It's a surprisingly difficult state to hold though, so don't be afraid to revert back to a count if you find it difficult to hold without thinking about anything (I know I certainly still do).

[FallacyofUrist]

Eat chocolate(in small amounts). Read good books. You don't need to do complex stuff in order to relax.
For that matter, posting on Bay 12 could help a bit.

[dwarfhoplite]

I need to run about 20 km a week to stay sane.

[ChairmanPoo]

Allright. Picture yourself going inside your cave, looking for your power animal...

[Sheb]

I like the Headspace website myself. I think they have a ten day free trial period.

[Salmeuk]

When I tried to meditate I practiced visualizing a simple shape, then following a spsrk of light that traveled along the edges of that shape in a rythmic sort of fashion. My mind always jumps to random things that are extremely interesting yet horribly distracting, and simply trying to focus on a single object or notion was too difficult. The moving light helped me feel restful while keeping my mind from getting to distracted. I suppose. My best advice is to do what feels best for you, and if some mantra or technique fails to work don't feel anxious about that (notice these self-reinforcing loops of anxiety before they getcha!).

[Neonivek]

Generally speaking different people have different methods that work well for them.

Though Meditation is rather cookie cutter on the surface, if you do your research you can find something that works for you.

[wobbly]

I like breathing techniques for their portability. I mean you breathe all the time right? It's useful to have a relaxation technique that can be used in actual stressful situations as well as a controlled environment & breathing slower works well in both situations.

[Urist McScoopbeard]

Try some handy-dandy meditation and/or hypnosis files. They really work well.

[Truean]

Imagery. Your imagination is powerful and influences feelings.

If and when you are in a bad place and/or with a bad person, sometimes your imagination can take you to better places. It's imaginary stimulus to get a better response for you.

There are several options. Zen is popular and useful. Japanese gardens, zen sand, marble spaces, well designed outdoor and indoor spaces may help. Art assists here.

I don't know if this is helping. I hope so. If you'd like more information, just ask for it in a post below this.

[Helgoland]

Stress and anxiety? Walks. Long, night-time walks. Walking helps me think, and I usually walk until I'm done thinking for the night. And if it takes three hours, it takes three hours - I don't give a damn.

Also drinking socially. And then talking about serious issues once I'm in a one-on-one situation with a close friend and we're both drunk enough. That helps too.



Ooooooh, and praying, actually. Only very occasionally, though - when I really, really need to stay sane, when I'm seriously drunk, or when Sheb is around. I... don't really know how to contextualize that. Probably should figure that one out.

[itisnotlogical]

What I do is I count breaths between heartbeats. Breath in five beats, wait five beats, breath out five beats, wait five beats...

I also find it effective to maintain a deliberate pose. Standing with your hands behind your back, a yoga pose, planking, as long as its something that you're deliberately doing. I have no idea why it helps, but it helps me.

[quekwoambojish]

Here are some suggestions from a student well being meditation thing I went to:

1.When contemplating a particular thought, visualizing it as a cloud in the sky. You can let it pass by and not bother you, or look at it and see if the cloud maybe takes an interesting form.

2. If you're having trouble focusing, monitor your breath, and consider how gravity acts on all things (or if you're super cool think of how waves of gravity effects all things). Doing this by the beach, with the white noise of the waves, and getting to see the wave peaks crash from the nature of gravity is very interesting.

3. Eat light foods, and look up comfortable beginner postures. Soreness and a noisy stomache can be a nuisance.

4. Find a secluded place, or a group that meditates. Being self conscious is a terrible distraction.

*This isn't 'professional' advice, but we'd sometimes have group meditation sessions on my campus for student well being.